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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Episode 6: Percy's "Finest" час

May 21, 1951

Ты already know this, but bare with me. Percy fixes tracks on the Union Pacific. He usually works with his best friend Jeff, but today that would change.

Percy: *walks along station*
Pete: Percy, I have some bad news.
Percy: What is it?
Pete: Jeff isn't feeling well, and took the день off. So we got Ты another пони to work with.
Percy: Uh, ok. Where is he?
Pete: He's right here.

The new пони was a black stallion, and walked rather quickly to the two ponies. His voice made him sound like he smoked 10 packs of cigarettes.

BS: Hello. My name is.. Douchebag.
Pete: Uh, yeah. You're working with Douchebag until Jeff feels better.
Percy: Ok. Come on Douchebag, I'll Показать Ты around.
Douchebag: Ok. *follows*
Percy: *walks to servicing facility* Sometimes we get to service engines here, but we mostly fix tracks.
Douchebag: Uh huh.
Percy: Over there is our truck. We drive it around the tracks, but if we're lucky we get to ride on a railcar.
Douchebag: Where are the keys to the truck?
Percy: I have them.
Douchebag: *steals keys*
Percy: Hey!
Douchebag: *steals truck*
Percy: I cannot believe this is happening. *runs to railcar*

As Douchebag was driving away, he nearly hit a train

Hawkeye: Whoa! Who was that?
Percy: *driving rail car toward Hawkeye's train* NO! *stops*
Hawkeye: *driving 39 miles an hour*
Percy: Come on! I have a theif to catch!

But luckily for Percy, the truck stalled

Douchebag: Grrrrr. How do I fix this?! *turns key* It didn't start *turns key*
Hawkeye: *passes Douchebag*

Meanwhile at the switch

Percy: *sees the end of Hawkeye's train* Finally *drives onto mainline*
Douchebag: *starts truck*
Percy: This пони is еще obnoxious then Gordon
Douchebag: *driving at 25 miles an hour*
Percy: *catching up*
Douchebag: *doing 30*
Percy: *catching up*
Douchebag: *doing 35*
Percy: *catches up* Douchebag!! Stop the truck!
Douchebag: No!
Percy: I now see why they call Ты Douchebag!
Douchebag: *rams Percy off rails*
Percy: *Flying after Douchebag*
Douchebag: *drives on train tracks*
Percy: *lands on truck*
Douchebag: Get off!!
Percy: no
Douchebag: *swerves to left*
Percy: *nearly falls off*
Douchebag: *Swerves to right*
Percy: *falls off*
Douchebag: Hahahaha. *sees train* AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *crashes*
Orion: Oh my god! How many times am I going to crash into things?!

Douchebag was hurt, but his injury wasn't serious.

Pete: How is it not serious? Ты ran into a train!
Douchebag: I know! Don't rub it in for crying out loud!
Pete: So Ты crashed a truck into a train on your first day. wow, you're fired.
Douchebag: Whatever.
Pete: And you're fired too
Percy: Me?!
Pete: Yes you!
Percy: What did I do?! That idiot украл, палантин the keys from me, and just took off after I told him not too!
Douchebag: Desperate, so desperate.
Percy: I am not! That's what happened!!
Pete: Just get outta here.
Percy: *flies away* I can't believe this is happening

Percy went to the station when he saw Red Rose.

Red Rose: Percy? What's wrong?
Percy: I got fired.
Red Rose: *gasp* Why?
Percy: Apparently I let a new worker steal a truck, and crash into a train.
Red Rose: That's terrible.
Percy: Yeah. If only Jeff wasn't sick.
Red Rose: Wait a minute. Ты just gave me an idea!
Percy: What?
Red Rose: Where's Coffee Creme?
Percy: I don't know.
Red Rose: Alright. What about Gordon?
Percy: He doesn't come back from his break until tomorrow.
Red Rose: Shit! Do Ты know where Jeff lives?
Percy: I think so.
Red Rose: Than go find him.
Percy: I'm on it! *flies off*

While that was going on..

Orion: Sir, did Ты really have to огонь Percy? He was chasing Douchebag, then got rammed off the tracks.
Pete: Ты saw this happen?
Orion: Not all of it, but I saw how Percy got hurt.
Pete: How did the truck push his тележка, корзина off the rails?
Orion: It went fast, and rammed his тележка, корзина by the side. He was pretty desperate to stop Douchebag. He even fell off the truck when trying to stop him.
Pete: And why did I огонь him?
Orion: Yeah, why did Ты огонь him?
Pete: Because he let that пони take the truck in the first place. Now if I saw how Douchebag got his hands on the keys, I wouldn't have fired him.

There was nothing еще Orion could say. He just returned to his train, and continued to the station

Meanwhile, Percy was still looking for Jeff. Percy flew along the streets of Cheyenne, and suddenly saw Jeff coming out of a pharmacy.

Percy: Jeff!
Jeff: Percy? What are Ты doing? I'm not feeling well.
Percy: I know, but listen. Do Ты know how Ты got sick?
Jeff: My doctor сказал(-а) it was from a filly I accidentally bumped into. She had some kind of virus.
Percy: When was it?
Jeff: Near my house.
Percy: No, when was it?
Jeff: Last night.
Percy: Alright. Time travel away.
Jeff: Uh, Percy? I don't know any time traveling spells.
Percy: Great. Our only hope is Coffee Creme.
Gordon: *stops nearby* или Ты can count on me.
Percy: Gordon? But you're not supposed to get back until tomorrow.
Gordon: Yeah well I didn't want to get late so I decided to leave early. Anyway, that's not the point. I heard Ты got fired, and needed some help.
Percy: Who told Ты this?
Gordon: Orion. He called me at the airport when I got back, and I came looking for you. Where are we heading?
Percy: To May 20, 1951. Cheyenne.
Jeff: On the intersection of West 25, and Carey Avenue.
Gordon: Got it.

As his horn lit up, Gordon concetrated on time travelling to last night.

Gordon: Well, we're here.
Jeff: There I am, and there's the Filly with her parents.
Percy: Let's stop you. *runs toward past Jeff*
filly: *walking towards past Jeff*
Future Jeff: Look out!
Past Jeff: *backs away from filly*
Parents: What are Ты doing shouting like that?! And why do Ты look exactly like this stallion?
Future Jeff: Time traveling unicorn here saved my life.
Gordon: That's me.
Parents: Come on Mary Sue *walk with filly*
Gordon: Well, we saved yourself from getting sick, and Percy is no longer fired.

The three ponies time travelled back into the morning of May 21, 1951

Percy: Good morning Pete
Pete: Morning Percy, Hi Jeff.
Jeff: What's good Pete?
Douchebag: *walks up*
Pete: Oh, Ты don't have to be here today Douchebag, Jeff is feeling fine.
Douchebag: Good. Cuz I'm not coming back here again *walks off*
Jeff: Is that the пони that was going to replace me?
Pete: Yeah. I thought Ты сказал(-а) Ты weren't feeling well.
Jeff: I tried calling Ты this morning. I feel better now.
Pete: Alright then. Get to work Ты two.
Percy: Yes sir *walks to servicing facility*
Jeff: *follows*

The End

On the Далее episode of Ponies On The Rails...

Pete tells a story of his past.
The film pretrays the British military as similar to Nazi's.
Killing prisoners of war and wounded soldiers, and burning a church filled with innocent townsfolk.

Stephen Hunter, a historian of the era, said: "Any image of the American Revolution which represents Ты Brits as Nazis and us as gentle folk is almost certainly wrong. It was a very горький war, a total war, and that is something that I am afraid has been Остаться в живых to history....[T]he presence of the Loyalists (colonists who did not want to Присоединиться the fight for independence from Britain) meant that the War of Independence was a conflict of complex loyalties."[37] The historian Richard F. Snow, editor of American Heritage magazine, сказал(-а) of the church-burning scene: "Of course it never happened—if it had do Ты think Americans would have forgotten it? It could have kept us out of World War I."
#1: Mark Wahlberg:
I am still yet to see ANY movie where I don't enjoy this guy's perfamance, he is good at EVERYTHING..
(except the shitty movie cover of Max Payne)..

#2: Seth Marfarlene:
He has done it all.
Movies, voice acting, singing, just about anything.
And he's good for all of it..

#3: LIAM NEESON:
Same as I сказал(-а) for Mark.
I'm still yet to find a bad performance by him..

#4: Ice Cube:
He raps, he acts, he's good at BOTH.

#5: Jim Carrey:
He is actually GOOD as a serious actor.
I respect that..

#6: Will Farrell:
Everyone hates him.
I don't get that..

#7: Brucie Willis:
He is сказал(-а) to be a bit of a dick in real life.
But so is Farrell.
I just like them anyway..

#8: EMINEM:
(same as Ice cube).

#9: SAMERAL JACKSON:
posted by Canada24
ALMOST A месяц LATER:

Inside a prison.

"You ok, kid?"

"Yeah, I'm ok. I'm sorry about your brother" Niko said, ironically sense he secretly killed him.

"[if Derrick is dead] Ah... me and Derrick had quite a few problems, but he was my brother... and it hurts. Poor fucking bastard. He believed in something once, which is better than me... I guess. Ah fuck, I'll miss him. [if Francis is dead] Gerry Ah... me and Francis were never exactly close, but he was my brother... and it hurts. Poor bastard. He believed in something once. That's a hell of a lot better than me, I guess. Fuck, I'll miss him" Gerry...
continue reading...
Shortly after finishing the battle and getting back Maureen's stolen items. Niko, knowing their both lonely, and need to Переместить on from Kate. Ended up asking Dash out.

"Oh.. Jee Niko.. I. I don't know... I mean.. I'm a mess!.. I'm a homeless, ill tempered, mess" Dash said, sadly.

"Oh come on.. Your a beautiful girl, who needs someone to care for you" Niko insisted.

"Well... I guess that's true.. But I try not to get close to people.. Just gets them hurt или killed" Dash сказал(-а) sadly.

"I'm the same.. But Roman says I shouldn't let Kate's accident stop me from getting close to people.. And I've decided.....
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#5: PRINCESS LUNA:
Princess Luna has a problems that a lot of us have. Family problems for the most part. She's always in the shadow of her sister. She's not appreciated for what she does. She's an lone wolf, alone for the most part. Lot of ponies judge her from her past and not what she is now. Unable to except her new self..

#4: TWILIGHT SPARKLE:
I never noticed at the time.
But she reminded me a bit of myself.
Never really having the time for friends.
Till I met them..

#3: ZUKO: THE LAST AIRBUNDER:
Zuko feels like an real person who goes through a lot in the world. His father abandoning him from...
continue reading...
posted by Canada24
Why dose everybody hate Roman Bellic.

Sure he probably isn't the best ROLE MODEL.

He drinks, swears, gambles, lies to his cousin about his "american lifestyle", and is sometimes a dick.

But for the most part.
Roman is so sweet.

He calls Ты a bit too much.
I get that.

But think about it.

He hasn't seen his own cousin in years.
I for one enjoy hanging with..

But I would let Roman haters go.

But there's a certain running joke that annoys me.

the joke of
"Cousin. Let's go bowling".

It's not even true.

Roman dose call me a lot.
But it's NEVER for bowling.

I only went bowling with him once so far.
And it was me who asked 'him' to go.

Every other time I am obsessed with asking people to go eat somewhere..
#1: Led Zepplin - Immigrant song:
Most people don't even have to LIKE Led Zeppelin to recognize the famish scream moment.
It's in so much Фильмы and other things, that Ты don't have know who the band even IS..

#2: Lep Zepplin - Kashmir:
Well, actually it's еще of the intro than the chorus.
Again.
You don't even to like или even KNOW Zeppelin to recognize the main guitar.
it's known as the James Bond theme song..

#3: Nivarna - Teen spirit:
We all know the chorus, don't we :).
I myself don't even know any Nivana song BUT this one.
So that kinda speaks for itself, don't it..

#4: Европа - final countdown:...
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Been seeing it about four months now, and it's the most "quotable" series EVER...

-------------------------------------------------------------------

#1:
(live audience scene):
Peele: What I often do.. I take note of things my girl dose wrong, and call her on it at the right times.
Key: (pretending to be the girl) Jordon, why'd Ты leave the toilet сиденье, место, сиденья up?
Peele: сука WHY WAS Ты LATE LAST NIGHT, AND I DIDN'T SAY NOTHING!?


#2:
(live audience scene):
Girl in audience: (laughing too hard)
Key: Ma'am... Breath.


#3:
Key: (texting angrily) do Ты even WANT to hang out!?
Peele: (texting calmly) Like I said...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hello everypony.
Master Sword: It's such a beautiful day, and nothing can ruin it.

Then, it started raining.

Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I wish I brought my umbrella with me.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I can't believe this is actually happening.
Master Sword: Well, it could be worse. Oh wait, it is.
Tom: Why?
Master Sword: There is no crossover parody today. Instead, we will be having a musical performance...
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Everyone knows about Squidward torture.
But I recently started noticing that Spongebob gets tortured himself...

Even modern Spongebob doesn't THIS much punishment..

------------------------------------------------------------

#1: THE SPLINTER:
Spongebob immediately got himself a splinter. Throughout the episode, Spongebob tries to not deal with it. but couldn't due to his thumb's injury. Should he used his other hand instead? (PLOTHOLE!) So, he decided to hide it, but Squidward (who told him nothing but lousy crap of hiding it and didn't solve anything) and s. Patrick only WORSENED the situation....
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#1: ABRIDGED ALEXANDER ANDERSON:

The abridged version of Alexander Anderson is vastly different than his Аниме counterpart. Like the original, he is a devoted servant of God. Unlike the original, he is ALSO shown to be downright insane. And speaks with an stereotypical Irish accent..



#2: ABRIDGED JAN VALENTINE:

This verison of Jan is almost exactly like his original counterpart. Who, itself, is very dark humored and comic relief, but also very disturbing and perverty. In this verison, he appears to "fuck anything that movies" as he says he'll skull fuck both sir ingeriga, and the...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
This is a parody of My Little Pony. The voice actors for the mane 6 are..

Ice Cube - Twilight Sparkle
Kath Soucie - радуга Dash
Sargent Schultz from Hogan's Герои - Pinkie Pie
Wally from The Cleveland Показать - Fluttershy
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity
Ashleigh Ball - Applejack

Now, let's begin. радуга Dash was with Fluttershy in a parking lot full of Buicks.

Rainbow Dash: Now, what have we learned?
Fluttershy: Nothing.
Rainbow Dash: No! We learned something.
Fluttershy: Lots of control.
Rainbow Dash: Good.
Fluttershy: Screaming, and hollering.
Rainbow Dash: Yes, and most importantly...
Fluttershy: Passion....
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
This is a parody of My Little Pony. The voice actors for the mane 6 are..

Ice Cube - Twilight Sparkle
Kath Soucie - радуга Dash
Sargent Schultz from Hogan's Герои - Pinkie Pie
Wally from The Cleveland Показать - Fluttershy
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity
Ashleigh Ball - Applejack

Now, let's begin. The pegasus ponies were putting storm clouds into the skies of Ponyville.

Rarity: *Watching the pegasi working* Why are they doing that?
Applejack: Because they're alcoholics fucking with Mother Nature. *Points to one of the pegasi* Эй, asshole!! Get the storm clouds out of here!! We're supposed to have blue skies...
continue reading...
#10: THE KILLS - GET OUT:
Yes, this a racist family trying to brainwash him into being somekind of mindless sex slave (well actually Chris is just wanted for his eyes, to give to a blind man).. But the level of utter brutality from Chris. Who seems to be the nicest guy ever. leaves Ты kind of disturbed..


#9: AMERICAN HISTORY X - CURB STOMP:
This was recommended by WindWaker.. Though I'm not sure how to feel about this.. I Любовь Edward Norton. Even in the hulk movie, so its even worse..


#8: JOHN WICK - DOG SCENE:
Before we see all the fun exciting stuff. First we have to get super attacted to the...
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#10: TREVOR PHILLIPS:
Trevor was described as a difficult person to deal with: extreme, unhinged, impetuous, psychopathic, unpredictable, sociopathic, and prone to violent outbursts and destructive rampages - in the секунда trailer he smashed an unknown person's head into a bar counter and was then seen setting a house on огонь and walking out of the area without a care in sight.

But Trevor is lowest.. Cause Trevor is honest about it and will never Показать hypocrisy and he will also have his own charm along with his own principals (his principals being different from Michael's)..



#9: THE GOVERNER (Comic...
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I actually put this.. Only for it to get me suspended from the site :(


SATEN TWIST:

Jerk with a сердце of Gold: Sword can sometimes come across as an uncaring jerk, espically in older seasons, but is actually a very kind hearted, loyal person, and very protective to those he cares for.

Characterization Marches On: Saten started out kinda crazy and not the most likeable.. He eventually became the only sane one in many ways, least in comparison to the misadventures he’s involved in..

-----------------------------------------------

DERPY HOOVES/TWIST:

The Stoner: At least at times..

Action Girl: Aside...
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#1: BRANDON WHITTAKER:
He is serprisingly "easy" as long as Ты have really good food, like wine, and streak.
Have the нож gloves and when he jumps out of the stall, attack away.
Or, even еще easy. Get a sniper and a pistol, stand near the entrance, wait till he leaps out of the stall, and than have him chase Ты out of the bathroom, he can only go so far, so wait till he jumps at you, dodge it, and shoot at him when he's running back to the bathroom.
And than just finish him off with the pistol when Ты run out of sniper bullets (if done properly, Ты won't lose any health)..


#2: SEYMOUR REDDING:...
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#1: KIRILL (John Wick):
John Wick probably thought Kirill would just be another body for his kill count. But Krill single handedly OWNS John.
Yeah.. Mr Wick (a mix of Chuck Norris and Max Payne) gets his жопа, попка handed to him..


#2: BADD (Kill Bill):
The character known as THE BRIDE, is known as the world's deadliest woman soldier. And she sneaks upto kill Budd, who was on her kill list, not knowing Budd was expecting her. And when she bursts though the front door, hoping to catch him off guard, she herself is the one caught off guard, Budd shoots the Bride, without needing to do very much, just sit...
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#1:
Max Payne: So I guess I'd become what they wanted me to be, a killer. Some rent-a-clown with a gun who puts holes in other bad guys. Well that's what they had paid for, so in the end that's what they got. Say what Ты want about Americans but we understand capitalism. Ты buy yourself a product and Ты get what Ты pay for, and these chumps had paid for some angry gringo without the sensibilities to know right from wrong. Here I was about to execute this poor bastard like some dime store Энджел of death and I realized they were correct, I wouldn't know right from wrong if one of them was...
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#1:
Rick: [after stabbing Shane for trying to kill Rick] Damn Ты for making me do this, Shane! This was you, not me! Ты did this to us! This was you! Not me! NOT ME!!... (sobs) Not me!...


#2:
Rick: Dale coud - could get under your skin. He sure got under mine, because he wasn't afraid to say what he thought, how he felt. That kind of honest is rare and brave. Whenever I'd make a decision, I'd look at Dale. He'd be looking back at me with that look he had. We've all seen it one time или another. I couldn't always read him, but he could read us. He saw people for who they were. He knew things...
continue reading...