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So, this is probably the last thing I'm going to do for Мулан месяц : A review, или ,in another words, my praise to Mulan.

Here are some Болталка thing I noticed while I was watching the movie for the 7th time this month.

 I'm bad-ass
I'm bad-ass
The movie starts with the Храбрая сердцем Chinese soldier. He lights the fire, which is for some reason, very risky. Many people complain how in this movie, Chinese nation is obsessed with honor, pride and things like that, but I don't see nothing wrong about. It's a positive thing, they are portrayed nicely, better than being portrayed as violent, ignorant and with no electricity.

Than we see Emperor giving some orders. He speaks really funny,why does he has to cut words in such unnatural way: "Send-my-troops-to protect-my-peo-ple".

The movie finally moves on our main character. We see Мулан Письмо notes, her lazyiness brought her to the point she's being late. This is just so like me. I always write notes for test 10 минуты before the school.

Далее we see are her bland mother and eccentric, a bit suicidal, grandma blabbing about some nonsense. And than great Chinese tune announces "Honor to us all".

 I'm bigger bad-ass
I'm bigger bad-ass


During this song Мулан shows how awesome and smart she is, taking doll from bully boy, kicking the жопа, попка of that man who was playing that... game.
 pins-eating lady
pins-eating lady


She has to dress up in fancy clothes and make up which is obviously killing her.

Than her grandma starts to sing about something serious and meaningful which doesn't Форс-мажоры her at all, she's born to be goofy. Мулан starts to sing with really high-pitched voice. What I wonder is why does all those girls know where they're suppose to go and what to do and only Mulan's completely lost?

Мулан eneters in mathcmakers... house? или office. She spills the lake of tea, but matchmaker is obviously blind.
 Yeah, what could possibly go wrong now
Yeah, what could possibly go wrong now


Мулан tries to stop mathcmaker from drinking cricket. Oh, Mulan, why did Ты do it? Just let her eat the damn, useless bug.
 Mathcmaker- having a seizure или something
Mathcmaker- having a seizure или something
Matchmaker's not so small butt sets on fire, and Мулан shows her obvious ignorance in physics by trying to put the огонь down with the fan.

So Мулан is embarassed, she goes Главная and starts to sing "Reflection". I Любовь emotions in the beginning and I Любовь the temple scene with billion of her reflections., but I have to admit, song is little bland and I don't really like the lyrics.

She is still upset so her father shows up and comforts her. He is such a great dude. Than goes scene with inviting civillans to the war.
We see stupidly long scene with dramatic score, as Fa Zhou is walking to recieve his invitation like he is God personally. Мулан embarasses herself again.

Did I metioned how awesome house Fa's have? They have damn river and bridge in the yard. They have armory and room for training. I bet they have spa too.



Now comes my Избранное scene decision. There goes the thunders, and rain and tears, and dum, dum, dum, awesome score, flashes in the temple, very beautiful.



As Мулан leaves, the ancestors wake up. Ancestors are hilarious.
 They should've known that this could never work
They should've known that this could never work


But greater evil wakes up with them : Eddie Murphy. Now to be clear, I like Mushu, and I think he is mildly funny, but his voice annoys me. So he destroys Stone dragon, and pretends to be him... and the boss (main ancestor) believes him. What? Are Ты retarted ? How come that Ты don't recognize that voice.?!



Meanwhile, we have unnecessarily long scene about Shan Yu being just bad-ass. Skip a scene, skip a scene...

Мулан tries to figure how to enter the army, stating she needs a miracle and the miracle shows up. While miracle is blabing, my mind wandered somewhere else.
 Tee-hee!
Tee-hee!

Мулан certainly has really small feet. If not, they would do foot binding to her, and she wouldn't be able to even walk properly, not to say run. If she, however, really has small feet, it would be hard for her to hold the balance on that roof. Gah, this movie is so horribly inconsistent.

____________________________________________________________________________

I'll post part two tomorrow
 OMG!
OMG!
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1- Ariel
Let's start with Ariel, the most famous princess in fanpop. In the Дисней version, Ariel was finally getting the prince she wanted to be with. But in the original and Disney-inspired tale written by Hans Christian Andersen, the ending was bad. Ariel...
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