| &# 34; No, Ты didn&# 39; t get me! It&# 39; s an electric drill!... |
|
"No, Ты didn't get me! It's an electric drill! Ты get me, Ты kill me!"
|
| I can&# 39; t choose! Thay&# 39; re all just so funny!!! |
|
I can't choose! Thay're all just so funny!!!
|
| &# 34; I&# 39; m not so good with the advice... Can I interest... |
|
"I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest Ты in a sarcastic comment?"
|
| &# 34; What did I marry into?&# 34; |
|
"What did I marry into?"
|
| &# 34; What kind of scary жопа, попка clowns came to your... |
|
"What kind of scary жопа, попка clowns came to your birthday?"
|
| &# 34; Marriage advice? Really?&# 34; |
|
"Marriage advice? Really?"
|
| &# 34; If you&# 39; re not careful Ты may not get married at... |
|
"If you're not careful Ты may not get married at all this year"
|
| &# 34; Joey was born, and then 28 years later, i was... |
|
"Joey was born, and then 28 years later, i was robbed!"
|
| &# 34; If I were a guy... did I just say if I were a... |
|
" If I were a guy... did I just say if I were a guy?"
|
| &# 34; Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian...&# 34; |
|
"Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian..."
|
| &# 34; Well maybe Ты don&# 39; t marry this one ...&# 34; |
|
"Well maybe Ты don't marry this one ..."
|
| &# 34; No, i want a flubby gut and saggy man- breasts!&# 34; |
|
"No, i want a flubby gut and saggy man-breasts!"
|
| &# 34; Someone on the subway licked my neck! Licked my... |
|
"Someone on the subway licked my neck! Licked my neck!!"
|
|
|
"I knew it! "
|
| &# 34; When I walk outside naked, people throw garbage... |
|
"When I walk outside naked, people throw garbage at me."
|
| &# 34; All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I... |
|
"All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men"
|
| Yeah, and I get my ya- ya&# 39; s from Ikea. Ты have to... |
|
Yeah, and I get my ya-ya's from Ikea. Ты have to put them together yourself, but
|
| &# 34; I have no name!&# 34; |
|
"I have no name!"
|
| &# 34; Yes, Ross. Pressing my third nipple opens the... |
|
"Yes, Ross. Pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magi
|
| &# 34; David, I&# 39; m pretending to read here!&# 34; |
|
"David, I'm pretending to read here!"
|
All these quotes are brilliant, but this one cracked me up when he said it XD
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