(Spin-off of the Card таблица Dating skit by Richard Jeni)
I say when Ты meet your other self Ты don't want a ужин table, what Ты want is a card table! A 1p and a 2p meet up at a card table, write all their emotional problems on little cards, and take turns slappin' em on the таблица and being honest. First time they're scheduled to meet, the first guy's got his card, he goes:
2p: "Hello it's nice to meet you, my name is Oliver, and I'm a baker!"
1p: "Hello, my name is Arthur, and I'm a WiZaRD!"
2p: "Uh, okay then... Well, my turn-"
1p: "I used to lock my brother in the closet when he was three!"...
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