Hi sinners! Well this is the chap before the big finale XDDD LOL Mmm not much to tell so…

Stupid, stupid woman. Why does she play a game with me? I mean what the hell was that? The porch discussion I mean. Why does she suddenly blame me only? I am so mad I’m slamming every single door of my house and then I start throwing picture frames to the floor.

Pictures of my wife and me, my children, my friends. They all crash.

There has always been a special blue frame that carried one of my Избранное pictures. It crashes against the floor and as I realize that I bent down to pick it up. It’s Ты and me. We were making cakes with Robert and out of boredom we started a flour war. We played like little kids. And we ended up covered with flour. The picture brings good times, I remember Robert taking it and then me carrying Ты in my arms while Ты poured syrup in my nose.

Why were we baking that time? I don’t remember but I already knew that I loved you.

I didn’t want things to go like they did on the porch. I wanted to Kiss Ты and hold Ты in my arms and be with you. I didn’t want to spit Screw Ты but Ты called me a cheater and a liar. I am not a liar with you. I Любовь Ты way too much to lie over my feelings.

I should talk to you, maybe I should call, but Ты won’t answer I think. I am calmer now but I feel like crying I know that I have now really screwed up and with Rick in our way it will be harder. I don’t know what to do. Ты won’t want to talk to me and I’m scared I have really Остаться в живых you.

But why do Ты say I never loved you? That’s what gets me angrier. Don’t Ты realize I have been there every time and then suddenly Rick’s here for a месяц and a half and Ты tell me “He was here”. Screw you. Five years count way еще than one month. But then again I did put Ты through pain. But I mean, com’ on I had memory loss! And that brainless wife of mine didn’t tell me anything. I would have stayed with you, all the time.

I sit down still holding the picture who’s frame is now broken. We’re broken just like the frame. And I’m not a good carpenter, maybe time is and when it passes, it will bring us back together. I caress the picture and pray that a carpenter appears soon.

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Tears еще tears and tears and tears again. I can’t believe I broke in front of Rick and he then сказал(-а)

“You Любовь him not me “and then he left.

Невероятное how screwed I am. I take my Избранное picture and glance at it for what seems the millionth time.

We are covered with flour. And I’m being carried by your arms while Ты look into my eyes. I’m smiling because I’m throwing syrup at your nose. And your smiling because… well maybe because Ты like having syrup at your nose. I remember that after that I wanted to lick it but Robert was there too so maybe it wouldn’t have been the greatest idea.

Those were good days. I wish we could go back to them. I’m mad at Ты and I feel like I hate you. I’m scared of hating you. I shouldn’t because I also Любовь you. Who understands? But well Ты hate me now. I think I should give Ты time and I’m still mad although how could I be so dump? I mean Jo didn’t say Ты had memory loss when I talked to her at the hospital.

Our relationship it’s like baking a big cake. We have to mix a lot of things together so it can make a perfect combination but if we screw with just one ingredient, the cake won’t come out being perfect. And I don’t look for a perfect relationship. I mean we’ll always screw with some ingredient but I want it to have just the necessary ingredients and that would be Ты and me and love. No one else should matter but life won’t allow us that. We have to mix press, work, wife, kids. I hate it. But I Любовь you.

I guess that if we can try bake another cake right? I guess we could put away some ingredients and try to make a smaller one. Preparing it step by step. Until it’s almost perfect. I want that. But I guess Ты don’t. I should just give Ты time. That’s all this cake needs. Time