posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: January 3, 1960
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 9:00 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific
Pete was in his office Чтение a newspaper. Hawkeye, and Stylo entered the office to see him.
Hawkeye: We heard very good news from Snowflake.
Stylo: Tell us it's true.
Pete: *Sad* It's true. Gordon quit the Union Pacific.
Hawkeye: Why are Ты sad about it?
Stylo: This is a time to celebrate.
Pete: Have Ты forgotten that we need engineers on this railway? We're running low on ponies that can drive trains, and Gordon made things worse for us!
Hawkeye: He actually made things better. You're forgetting who you're talking about.
Pete: Yeah? Well take a look at this. *Shows Pierce, and Stylo the newspaper* Gordon blew his own brains out, and all of a sudden, his suicide makes the front page.
Hawkeye: *Sees the newspaper* HAHA! Yes! This is the greatest день ever!!!
Stylo: Now we really need to celebrate!
Pete: Do Ты realize what this will do to us? Read the paper.
Hawkeye: An оранжевый unicorn formerly working on the Union Pacific quit his job in anger, then went to his house, and shot himself in the head.
Pete: Now everypony is going to assume that all of us that work on this railway are suicidal nut jobs.
Hawkeye: There is one thing Ты can do.
Pete: What's that?
Stylo: Ask some help from the Southern Pacific.
Pete: *Thinks* There is one пони I can get from the SP to help us.
In Los Angeles, Nikki just finished driving an express train. She was waiting for it to depart, and while doing so, she was playing poker with three stallions inside the station.
Nikki: I am going to raise the stakes to ninety.
Stallions: *Put in 90 dollars*
Stallion 1: There are thousands of dollars in here gentlecolts, *Looks at Nikki* And lady. Now, *Shows his hand* Three of a kind, aces.
Stallion 2: Ты beat me, two pairs. Eights, and Kings.
Stallion 3: Four of a kind Jacks.
Nikki: *Shows her hand. Four of a kind kings* My kings beat your Jacks.
Stallion 3: *Pushes the money to Nikki* Well done. *Hears the phone ringing* Excuse me. *Goes to the phone* Bruce Arvantidas. *Listens to the phone* Yes. She's here. She is? Well, I'll let her know right now. *Hangs up* Nikki, Ты got a call from your boss in Ogden. Ты are working in Cheyenne for the Union Pacific.
Nikki: For how long?
Stallion 3: Michael did not tell me. All I know is that somepony named Pete is running short on engineers. He needs more.
Nikki: I'm on my way.
Meanwhile in Cheyenne.
Pete: *In the train yard* Gonzo!
Mike: *Arrives* Yes sir?
Pete: You're getting a temporary promotion. Can Ты drive a train?
Mike: Of course I can sir.
Pete: Good. Go to Ogden, and deliver a freight train of livestock, and metal.
Mike: Okay sir.
Pete: It's all set up for you. Climb into that diesel over there, and get going pronto.
Mike: *Runs to the freight train*
Pete: And follow the speed limits. If Ты go too fast, your train will crash, and if Ты crash your train, I'll огонь you.
Mike: Don't worry sir. I won't crash your train. *Drives the train passing a red signal*
Mirage: *Blows the horn on his train, and applies the brakes, nearly hitting Mike's train*
Pete: *Sighs nervously, and looks at the sky* Why aren't Ты helping us?
Snowflake: *Opens a window in her yard tower* Sir, are Ты talking to yourself?
Pete: Nope, I'm trying to get an answer from god. He's screwing us over, and we haven't done a damn thing wrong. Except for the swear word I just сказал(-а) out loud. *Walks away*
2 B Continued