The Lightning Fart: A Parody of The Lightning Thief

I don't know where to begin....all I know is that Rick Riordan wrote about my real-life...My name is Jason Pabon ( firstname: Jason...lastname: means Peacock of Hera, или Bird of Hera--coincidence?)...I grew up in Cicero...next to the Olympic Theater (Olympus?).....coincidence mother's name is Maia (noticed same name as Hermes' mother lesser goddess)....My whole life I've had weird dreams about the greek gods before I even knew who they were! Later Arcadia Circle, ...visitied Crete, IL...I made a painting of Hermes; messenger of the gods in high school....I was the fastest long distance runner...