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We're all familiar with the term damsel in distress and we usually think about a female character that's tied to the train tracks by a villain with a curly-q mustache, and has to be saved by the dashing hero. I wonder where the idea first came from. We've always seen this with female characters because female damsels in distress have been around since the dawn of literature itself. However, during the mid или late 1900's, we've discovered that there are male characters that have to constantly be saved as well. What's the term for male damsel's in distress? There isn't one, even though some people...
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These are my вверх 15 LEAST Избранное Знаменитости and just like with my вверх 15 Избранное Знаменитости Список I'm only basing this off who they are as a person, but I will talk about their talent as well. I will also tell Ты how attractive I think these people are because there are very few on here I find ugly and some I find very attractive, I'm just going to mention it just to Показать that I'm not biased like some people. This one person who did a Список like this pretty much just сказал(-а) they were all ugly and even compared them to animals. Anyway, this is my Список and please keep in mind this is just my...
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posted by FlufflyHands
Everyone is putting stuff up about Walmart, I was smart enough to think of CVS :D (I made these up on my own with no one elses help btw)

1. Resort the medicine aisle

2. Run around like an idiot until Ты are told to stop, once the person who stopped turns around do it again, repeat this process until your told to leave, then run out like an idiot

3. Go up to the cash register and tell the clerk that someone is "poaching" medicine, then run out of the store

4. Take the magazines Ты see and tear them to pieces, then go up to the front (were the cash register is) and throw the pieces up the air and...
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posted by OmegaLeader
(Found it on the internet thought it was pretty interesting.)

You call your victim and Ты want to confuse them. No laughing или anything, just a normal voice like someone would call you. Me and my Друзья do this a lot.


Script:
You call the person...

Person: Hello?
You: Hello?
Person: Uh, hi. Who is this and what do Ты want?
You: What? Oh no no no no no! It is Ты who is calling me. Ok, so what did Ты need?
Person: No no I didn't call you. Ты called me. Wait, who is this??
You: NO! I didn't call you! Ты are the one who called me! Now i ask one еще time who are Ты and why did Ты call my at this...
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posted by awesomeblossom1
Here's some of my fave "I wasnt that drunk" jokes hope Ты like :)
"I wasn't that drunk"
"You saw a ginger girl eating blueberries and screamed 'No Foxface! Not the berries!'"
"You ran into Walmart and when Ты heard someone talking on the intercom, Ты fell to your knees and said, 'God has spoken!'"
"You grabbed my parakeet, threw it at my sisters piggy bank and yelled, 'ANGRY BIRDS!!!!!'"
"You told me to give Ты a ride Главная and the part was at your house"
"You asked your girlfriend if she was single"
"You gave a midget a гриб and yelled 'GROW MARIO GROW!!!'"
"You were cutting open pineapples...
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posted by Jasonfan44
It's an iPod app.

1. Men are 6 times еще likely to get struck by lightning then women

2. On average, adults watch double the amount of TV as teenagers do

3. The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA".

4. At the height of its power(400 BCE) the Greek city of Sparta had 500,000 slaves and only 25,000 citizens

5. The state of Florida is bigger than England

6. Approximate number of facial expressions Собаки can make: 100

7. A улитка can sleep for 3 years

8. It is illegal for tourists to enter Mexico with еще than 2 CD's

9. Muhammad is the most common first name in the world...
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posted by Me_Iz_Here
There are a lot of creeps on Omegle. Whether you're just bored, trolling, или being a creep, Ты will definitely run into a pervert on Omegle. So here are some comebacks Ты can use.

Stranger: Horny?
You: Yes.
You: BECAUSE I'M A UNICORN!

Stranger: ASL.
You: Sorry, I don't speak American Sign Language.

Stranger: 17 M looking for horny females
You": 85, M, looking for other gay men.

Stranger: Wanna chat with hot girls? Go to "Babesofomegle . com"
You: No thanks I don't feel like seeing whores like you.

Strangers: Wanna fuck?
You: How the fuck are we gonna fuck if you're so fucking far away and I'm not gonna fucking tell Ты where I fucking live so we can fuck Болталка strangers.

Stranger: Ты like dick?
You: Yes, I do like Dick. He's very nice. I don't get why people make fun of him for his name.
You: Ты ARE talking about the person, right?

Other ways are to just repeat the same thing over and over again, или copy everything they say.
posted by fanfly
A while back I wrote an Статья about link. I've decided to follow it up with a tutorial on how to make icons! They're actually much the same- the major difference is size.

You will need an image editing program. I use Corel Paint Магазин Pro but I think most people use Photoshop.

There's also the following online programs but I've never used them and this tutorial isn't necessarily meant to be used with them because I have no idea what these programs are capable of doing.

link
link
link




the Size of Your Иконка Matters


Now this part is extremely important and I can't tell Ты how many Иконки I've seen that...
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posted by vlad_todd_fan
This is A TRUE STORY AND IF Ты DON'T PASS THIS ON Ты DON'T HAVE A SOUL!!!

My name is Chris,
I am three,
My eyes are swollen..
I cannot see.

I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
What else could have made,
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy,
Would still want to hug me.

I can't do a wrong,
I can't speak at all,
Or else I'm locked up,
All день long.

When I'm awake,
I'm all alone,
The house is dark,
My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come home,
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get,
One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car,
My daddy is back,
From Charlie's bar

I hear...
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Ok so me and my friend Любовь the mall but what makes it еще fun are the following

-When your Остаться в живых looking for a store ask them in a british accents! here's an example "Pardon me, could Ты please point me in the direction of ______" (if u are british do it in a differnt accent like american austraian ect.)

-When Ты go into a store adress your friend by a differnt name and have a weird personality

-if Ты go into one of those store that plays the Музыка REALLY loud, sing along like there's nobody else in the store but Ты and ur friend.

-Have weird conversations about Болталка things. like terrorists или something

Have fun with Друзья at the mall!
1. Q."Can I screw you?"
A.I would say: "No..."

2. Q/M."Would Ты mind if I read this?"*Holds up some porn magazine*
A. I would say: "I don't give a da**..."

3. Q/M. *Hugs Ты and takes a little something off Ты would like him not to*
A.I would slap him and say "Don't do that, da** it!"

4. Q. "Are Ты sure we can't f***?"
A. I would say: "If Ты say that agin...I swear I'm going to get ticked..."
5. Q. "That somehow arouses me..."
A. I would say:"Get aroused all Ты want, not like I care if Ты are или aren't...As long as Ты don't jump around..."

6. Q. "I want to sign your shirt..."
A. I would say:...
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posted by TDAPlayer158
link

60. Matthias
59. Thaddeus
58. Asia
57. Ananias
56. Syria
55. Ephesus
54. Esau
53. Mt. Zion
52. An-ti-och
51. King Nebuchadnezzar
50. Macedonia
49. Jacob
48. Moses
47. Judah
46. Abraham
45. Kerith
44. Sapphira
43. Ahab
42. Rehoboam
41. Jeroboam
40. Baasha
39. Mahar-shalal-hash-baz
38. Maale-akrabbim
37. Isaiah
36. Je'ho'sha'phat
35. Ahaziah
34. Queen Athaliah
33. Pastor Eric
32. Zechariah
31. Joel
30. Pastor Ian
29. Jeremiah
28. Brad
27. Abijah
26. Ahijah
25. Uzziah
24. Thessalonians
23. Jerusalem
22. Titus
21. Tabitha
20. Thaddeus
19. Pastor Kerry
18. Tirshatha
17. Dalmatia
16. Simon-Peter-Leaka-tepha-lika
15. Hezekiah
14. Barrabas
13. Tarpelites
12. Demetrius
11. Deuteronomy
10. Exodus
09. Leviticus
08. Ezekiel
07. Gethsemane
06. Mary
05. Gabriel
04. Matthew-Mark-Luke-Johnaliqua
03. Gettah Hepher
02. Kadesh Barnea
01. JESUS
not by me n thnx for readinnnnnnnnnn........♥♥

ll around us, everyday, there are two groups of people that many believe to be different. Not so! Teen-agers and Seniors have a lot in common. If it's accidentally putting their shoe on the wrong foot или putting their foot in their mouth, there are instances of conduct that are very similar in both groups.

For example:

Both groups like to hang out at fast Еда restaurants and shopping malls.

Both groups have developed their own "walk."

Both groups like to wear clothing that doesn't fit well.

Both groups seem to have questionable facial hair.

Both...
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posted by ilovepenguins
I didn't write this!


Sell used bus tickets. Claim they are for half the price.

Get on the bus, grinning widely. As soon as the bus begins to move, burst into song. When Ты arrive at the Далее stop, stop singing. Step off the bus backwards, still grinning widely.

If Ты are seated between two passengers, yawn loudly, strech, and put your arms around them.

Greet passengers with a big hug, handshake, smile and say ³Hi, call me Norman²

Put a leash on a friend and walk him/her onto the bus. Insist he/she is a dog and should go for half fare.

When arriving at your stop, do not push the button to...
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50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time Ты turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him или her that you’ve Остаться в живых your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he или she has anything...
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1. Ты can do whatever Ты damn well please.

2. Shave your legs and the razor is never dull from his face.

3. Not only is your razor not dull, who needs to shave at all now?

4. Ты can leave bra and other unmentionables in view.

5. Ты can slump around the house in any old thing.

6. Ты don't having to think about birth control, calendars или ovulation. Mother Nature can visit whenever she likes.

7. Ты can go out and flirt as much as your сердце desires, without a worry in the world.

8. The toilet сиденье, место, сиденья issue -- need I say more?

9. Free drinks at bars! Men seem to know when you're single and tend to...
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posted by Mallory101
" Watch out for the idiot behind me!"
Moooooove, I'm trying to speed!
If you're rich, I’m single!
0-60 in 15 minutes!
A clean car is a sign if sick mind.
100% Irony Free
Adrenalin is my drug of choice.
Adults are just kids with money.
Baby on bored
HOME SCHOOL. Smarter than ever.
I talk to strangers
I Think Feminists Are Cute!
Keep honking, I am reloading!
Pain is inevitable misery is optional.
To All Ты Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
Tennis players have fuzzy balls.
Your honor student deals the best drugs.


The fastest way to a fisherman's сердце is through his fly
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re...
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posted by thatguywashot
1.Pull aside an unruly child in a preschool Sunday School class and say: "If you're bad in here, you'll go to Hell."

2.A week beforehand, find a member of ACT-UP. Tell him the scheduled sermon is entitled "Why God Sent AIDS to Punish Homosexuals".

3.Put stray Собаки in пальто closets.

4.Un-tune the piano.

5.Replace the pianist's sheet Музыка with "Stairway to Heaven".

6.Going through all the hymnals, mark song 666.

7.Find an empty seat, and ask the person Далее to it: "Is this сиденье, место, сиденья SAVED?"

8.Toss around a giant пляж, пляжный ball before service, like at Grateful Dead concerts.

9.Ten минуты before it starts, find...
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posted by My8thUsername
A/N:Okay, I have seen a lot of these around, so I decided to look through through all of them an make my own Список of вверх Five 'Roses Are Red' Poems. Just cause I wanted to. Basically, everything I do is 'just cause I want to'. Except homework.

5.A/N:Best disclaimer EVER! Well, one of them...
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Me no own
So Ты no sue

4."Roses are red, violets are blue."
That's what they say, but it just isn't true.
Roses are red, and apples are too,
But violets are violet. Violets aren't blue.
An оранжевый is orange, but Greenland's not green
And pinkies aren't pink. So what does it mean?...
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posted by EmzLovesCheryl
Hey, this is my piece for my drama exam, without the stage directions. I started Письмо it out on here as a way of learning it, then I thought, why no post it? I may as well, it's going to do no harm. :D
So here it is, its rather depressing though. So if Ты don't need to be depressed right now, then I suggest Ты don't read it. :)




[Give me a break. You’re going to go back to your Друзья and either forget all about us или tell a story about the hideous freak Ты met tonight. Ты don’t know me, if Ты did, you’d never think we’d be friends. I don’t have Друзья - except my brother....
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