Riku114 Wall

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Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Shit man. Im starting to fall down the rabbit hole of Marvel. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Yall I dont want to gain another HUGE series to keep track of :v звезда Wars added to it and :v Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like Im feeling urged to go back and actually fully watch the Iron Man Фильмы rather than half assing them too :v Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
That's good though. Embrace Marvel, Riku. Ты know Ты want to !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Fun story time. I dont really remember the details too well, but like... three или four years ago, I was having some kind of a high anxiety day. I dunno if it was a panic attack that I didnt know of, an anxiety attack, или some traumatic shit или anything, but I was experiencing high anxiety and was excessively zoned out as to cope with it, and some guy came to like... touch me, hug me, или pat me или something Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
So like... I had a секунда или two of panic where I shoved him up against the railing of the upper floor and was like... a секунда или two away from instinctually pushing him over the railing of the секунда floor before I snapped out of it and somehow managed to play it off as a joke Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like I dont know HOW I played it off without any Вопросы asked cos I pushed him like a good 5-10 feet to get him to the railing and I wouldnt be shocked if I had a crazed look XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Nah I didnt look sad. I have a resting сука face no matter what emotion Im feeling Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
RIP all my classes from today вперед tho XD My brain officially went from like 90% checked out, to like 100% checked out for the rest of the school год when I finished my AP Government test (even tho I still have an AP Econ test on Wednesday XD) Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
Awesome. Be lazy time? Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Lazy is life Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, the sheer degree of which I like Stephen Strange is.... STRANGE.

Like I watched the movie, enjoyed it a lot, but he wasnt all too high on my list, but out of no where suddenly Im just as hyped to see him on screen as the long term Marvel Избранное of mine - Loki?

And I just get that natural "Hes a favorite" feel, but I dont know exactly why..?

I mean Imma make Wanta watch it and I wanna watch it to analyze and see why I might like him XD But still. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
My memory is iffy but maybe I kinda relate to him? Who knows. I know I do have some similarities Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I really dont have the ability to be comfortable saying I like a character just cos I like them. I need to be able to know what in specific I like :v Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Ты know, if Ты think about it, being a hero, a famous hero, just honestly isnt fair. Its borderline toxic. At the point that someone becomes a famous hero, the pressure to constantly be the hero and be responsible of helping others and saving the день just would consume the life of the 'hero'

Sure they are saving people and being great people, but it comes at the cost of their limited existence.

When Ты think about it like that, Ты have to pity superheroes Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
oh they undeniably have it pretty bad. Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
As an idealist, I can assure Ты gets rough having the pressure to always remain upbeat XD Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
IKR if I was a ‘hero’ I’d probably like idk Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
I think I adequately fucked with Riku's mind right before she went to sleep. I'm satisfied with that Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Why does Faba not have a Flygon? Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I AM BEING SHAMED FOR HAVING AN ESTIMATE OF 300-450 ENGLISH SONGS PICKED OUT ON THAT LIST.

FIRSTLY, THATS ONLY LIKE THE вверх OF THEM EACH

SECONDLY, I ADMIT IM A Музыка JUNKIE, BUT COMPARED TO SOME PEOPLE I KNOW AND ZANHAR, IM A CUTE BABY Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
THIRDLY, I HAVE AN INSTUMENTAL PLAYLIST PROBABLY 9X LONGER, A JAPANESE PLAYLIST ABOUT THE SAME LENGTH (guessing), AND A KOREAN PLAYLIST THAT IS PROBABLY A BIT SMALLER Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
THIS IS NOTHING мотыга, мотыги Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
*cough* My irl Друзья have no place judging me :v Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
My USB currently has 225 songs in the English folder. Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, people in my school make fun of me for only listening to 'weeb' music, but truth is I probably like еще English songs than most of the people saying that. Im a Музыка junkie. Its just I have so much I like that downloading all of it is overwhelming :v Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ #Relatable !!!! Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
Музыка is just really nice. Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Without this Музыка I don’t know how I would’ve fought this - Lane Boy |-/ Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Ha. My English teacher had us 'read' like six Книги in preparation for the AP Exam essay, then I did my mock on Romeo and Juliet (one that wasnt one of the six) and I сказал(-а) Id probably do it on the AP Exam cos I know that one better than I should

She сказал(-а) I shouldnt because its been a while since I read it and since it doesnt cover all the topics that well and should study the other Книги (not that I even studied R&J) Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
But fuck that XD Totally wrote my essay on Romeo and Juliet XD I know that piece too well solely cause its famous, cos I read Tybalt two years назад and really liked his character еще than I should have, watched an Аниме version of the play (which btw, had the plot changed a lot, I recommend the anime), and cos its jsut a good piece to analyze off of since a lot of stories can take a lot of inspiration and similarities off of it Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Even one of my side stories has a lot of parallels I didn't really intentionally do Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSS !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Despite never really watching the movie или anything, Ive always been attached to the idea and things themed / inspired from Alice in Wonderland Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Same honestly. Have always found its whole concept fascinating !!!! Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Me too! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Im sorry Im like.... on a tired high.

I only got 3 hours of sleep for a really busy день XD

If I say weird stuff, enjoy XD Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
TIRED RIKU! DON'T APOLOGIZE! COME OUT FURTHER! DO MORE! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
If I talk too much I might start casually talk about murder или shit. Im in a demented tired :v Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
A tired high? Oh so that’s what Ты call it. That happens to me as well. So excuse any crazy stuff I say... I’m out of it a lot Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Seriously Riku needs to stop being all ansty about it and accept my offer to let her stab me with one of her knives. I mean sheesh. It's a flesh wound. MAYBE liver injury at worst. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Keep talking weird shit like that and itll be in the head Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
jk jk Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, I am not going to lie. I am 'crazy' and 'insane'. I used to be even еще so, but honestly even now I still can be. I've gone to the point of naming myself something else. I've talked way too excessively with people in my head, one of which tried to convince me I was a god before I realized I was getting way too off the rocker.

I've thought of excessively sadistic things with no guilt или shame to back it up. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Personally, I strongly accept that part of me. The closer Ты get to me, the еще creepy and unsettling things Ты might find my mind causing. But its honestly something I accept of myself. I am definately working out of it since it isn't a GOOD thing to be like this, but its not something Im going to let harm my esteem или hold against myself Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I dont disclose too much of specifics of how... off... I can get at times since theres no need for that to spill out onto here, because I always sound like a psycho edgelord and I find that cringey, and because personally I dont like to attribute it to my в общем и целом, общая character. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
But yeah thats just kinda a ramble Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I want sleep Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ты NEED sleep !!!! Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
Sleep? Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
ya deserve sleep so much Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
"If that's the case, then Ты owe it to yourself to pick apart the games Ты LOVE, not just the ones Ты hate."

Любовь that. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Person: Im so stressed out Imma pull out my hair!

Me, a person with Trichotillomania: https://tinyurl.com/y8fvjeqz Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Honestly, I'm not the type to be like "OMG Ты ARE MAKING LITTLE OF MY DISORDER" because Trich is pretty poorly covered and that is a common saying, but I still kinda just take a pause whenever I hear it Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Cos like... сука I doubt Ты are literally gonna pull out your hair :v Stop appropriating my culture Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Jk jk Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I just find it funny-ish whenever I hear that line Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
I text Riku too much. Confirmed. RIP Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Ha I bet ya do! Y’all are so close! :) Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
*deep breath* *sigh* Honestly, searching for a roommate is a pain in the жопа, попка with my family issues and vulnerability issues and just my в общем и целом, общая trust issues and stuff. Like I know I'll be fine regardless and I'll make Друзья and all just fine. Its just my brain being stupid about it while I'm waiting for a reply combined with how this whole "I cant just get this done with" stuff does not fit with me who likes to get things done with before moving onto the next. Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Good luck buddy. Try not to listen when Ты tell yourself stuff like that. You’ll get through it and everything will work out. :). [Wow. Listen to me, little motivationist. I’m trying.] Stay Alive |-/ Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Nah, to be honest, the things that concern me are genuine issues I need to keep in check. Some of the issues I have with making irl Друзья are deep rooted with family issues of mine and I actually genuinely do sabotage them myself with how my anxiety and stuff reacts to certain things. Its a work in progress and all and I know Ill get through it XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Its just a stinkin pain in the asssss Больше года
2ntyoneplts сказал(-а) …
Hi I’m back! A few days is like a год when Ты live here Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Welcome back Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, Im waiting for еще information on Osoro Shidesu specifically from Yandere Simulator. Cos honestly right now she kinda borders relatable, but there is so little actually дана out on her character.

Im super interested tho. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
She looks interesting. Has a pretty cool appearance too !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
So got back from Infinity War.

Not nearly as depressing или sad as like.... 99% of people make it out to be. Maybe its the fact I bathe in tragedy или because I write stories and tragedy as much as I do, but it didnt really hit me too hard.

Also rather predictable if Ты ask me. Like I wasnt shocked или surprised with anything other than the abrupt ending. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
With that being said. I loveeeed the movie. It was great and I honestly like how the first like... half of the movie had my избранное XD Thor, Loki, Dr. Strange, and Guardians of the Galaxy. Just awesome XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Oh and Stark. Thats the other one. XD вверх Five Marvel Characters. ((Yes GoG is counted as one imo XD)) Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Great to know. Looking вперед to seeing it myself !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
My dad pissed me off. My dad just wants us to keep breeding my bird and wonders why we arent letting Smokey breed and every time we tell him its not healthy for them, its abusive to make them breeders for money, and that it adds to the problem that most parrots go to shitty homes, he just scoffs.

I called him out at constantly scoffing at it and hes like "You could make money"

So like. Fuck that greedy жопа, попка bastard. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ill stuff that asshole in a cage with a woman and force them to have children for money. See how he fucking likes it. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Not really but still. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I dont HATE him as much as I sound like I do. I just refuse to forgive him или give him any leeway или even truly see him as my dad / family until he gets his behavior straightened a bit and honestly and genuinely makes amends and realizes how shitty of a person he was / still sometimes is Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, smart charismatic people are some of the last people Ты want to trust. They can analyze people way too well, and with charisma, they can pull strings way too well to make things happe-

.... oh shit wait. Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Lol! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Also a Болталка fact

Birds are literally dinosaurs

I raise baby Динозавры Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Also, Ты doubt it until Ты hear what baby cockatiels sound like. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
link Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Also Болталка fact about Riku

On an average, I make sure to get at least 30-60 минуты of bird Видео within each day.

It makes me happy. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
On another note, as I begin talking of my plans for the future and all, the rate of which my Любовь and knowledge on birds began to become well known rapidly sped up

At this point, I can now expect that if I hear any talk of birds between two people and there seems to be disagreement или uncertainty of facts, that within five минуты Ill hear "Hey Riku! Ты are the bird expert, give us some info on this topic!" across the room Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
It’s expected by now I imagine:) Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Im just shaking my head here at this argument between two people over Akashi.

One side is arguing "Akashi doesnt care for team work and bringing people together and only cares about winning." The other side is arguing "No, Akashi is all for team work and bring people together. Its one of his strongest characteristics and his main role in his team."

And Im just like.... Neither of Ты are right или wrong. Ты are just ignoring an entire half of his character. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like I dont even know how they just ignore one side или the other. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Honestly I really need to see "The Last Game" since there is a lot еще interaction between Bokushi and Oreshi. Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
GONNA WATCH INFINITY WAR TODAY.

#HYPE Опубликовано Больше года
BlindBandit92 прокомментировал(-а)…
It was a great movie. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ #ThanosDemandsYourSilence LOL !!!! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Annnd my dad didnt understand me when I сказал(-а) we had to leave early cos itd be busy / sold out XD So going tomorrow! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Decided to take the trumpet solo in the Game of Thrones theme for Zeppie cos she seemed happy enough that we were playing it, I figured Id do that in her name as well. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, Im tired as hell despite me constantly sleeping at least an час или two early most nights.

I am really just a permanently exhausted and tired bun.

I just want a good night to sleep and all.

.... did I not have a weekend to rest или something? I dont really remember 5 days back XD Опубликовано Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
take care of ya riku =( and try to sleep if ya can , want to see ya healthy Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ This, pretty much. Make sure Ты rest whenever Ты are able to. Still hyped for #RelaxedRikubun at some point !!!! Больше года
2ntyoneplts сказал(-а) …
Эй, this probably sounds really weird but I Любовь Ты guys. Feel free to ignore this if Ты want. Most people either feel very uncomfortable или just don’t understand.
Stay Alive |-/ Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Its cool dood XD Больше года
nightiee прокомментировал(-а)…
Ты too Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Most people could feel uncomfortable but I doubt that they wouldn't understand. Your feelings are much appreciated. Right back at Ты !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
So in my school we have this thing called a Senior Exit Project required to let us graduate and all where we have to present a powerpoint to a panel of teachers about our plans and all

I dont get why everyone is freaking out, trying to memorize it, and some barely passing it.

I did little to no preparation other than setting up the power point and just by talking about what I did for my Job Shadow and why I wanna do what I wanna do, I got a perfect score on the mock Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Relax. Talk genuinely and tell them what Ты feel and mean. Its not that hard. I get the shy introverts struggling with it, but even some of the large known extroverts are stressing out Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Good job. I bet you’re glad that’s over thou! |-/ Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly if I watched Madoka Magica again I feel Id relate to Kyoko еще than I did the first time Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
I could see Ты relating a LIL bit to Mai from Ghost Hunt Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Kyoko has always been one of the Characters that interested me the most in this Series. I am pretty curious about which Character I could mostly relate myself when I finally continue and go even further with this Аниме !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Yeah honestly though, I am such an extrovert.

Now that Im not a ball of anxiety, depression, angst, and massive distrust, I find that a lot of my goals surround people and having them around me and being a speaker and stuff.

Im not even an ambivert. Im a strict extrovert XD Just a highly selective one at that. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
link Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Wow 5hats pretty cool Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
❤️ Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Alright Im back. And with an emote of my own. -x- Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
LOL Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Good to know. Welcome back !!!! Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
welcome back wanta! Больше года
sunny
TheLefteris24 сказал(-а) …
Attention everyone! ''Rikubun'' has been added to the Список of Nicknames available for Riku. I would like to make this Official. Fluffy Rikubun will certainly be referred to as such from now on.

KANPAI !!!! Опубликовано Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Got it :^; Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Uh what was that I just did?! Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ Are Ты talking about the Emoji Ты made? It certainly seems unusual. A Typo, I guess? Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Yup. LOL Больше года
2ntyoneplts сказал(-а) …
<3 thanks for the hope Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Keep the hope alive. <3 Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Preach 🙏 !!!! Больше года
nightiee прокомментировал(-а)…
Keep the мотыга, мотыги alive Больше года
2ntyoneplts прокомментировал(-а)…
Oh Satan! XD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I always wanna write but dont have the energy and/or the creative flow XD Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Gosh Im tired XD Im still good and all tho guys. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Sorry about all the trauma talk out here lately XD I usually like to keep things fun and all, but Ive been too busy to be full on obsessed with anything, and dealing with trauma has been one of my largest focuses and goals these days XD

I dont any of Ты mind but I wanted to put that out there. Опубликовано Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
don`t say sorry riku we understand it totally Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ !!!! Больше года
BlindBandit92 прокомментировал(-а)…
riku it's your club. You're entitled to do anything Ты want. It's a blog of sorts. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
XD I know. I just wanted to put it out there Больше года
sunny
TheLefteris24 сказал(-а) …
Also......

HAIL HYDRA !!!! Опубликовано Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
xD leftie Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
XD !!!! Больше года
sunny
TheLefteris24 сказал(-а) …
#PidgeonLivesMatterToo !!!! Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
#PigeonLivesMatterToo Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ Preach !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
So I asked my therapist out of curiosity and all, and I do have PTSD apparently. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
I see. It makes a lot of sense when thinking about it !!!! Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Just gotta keep urging Riku to shoot someone in broad daylight. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Aye Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Riku: The Highly Selective Extrovert. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I actually saw that while scrolling Tumblr and I think that Описание fits me VERY well XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Better than Ambivert tbh XD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
WOW MY DAD JUST DID THE MOST CARING THING I EVER HEARD HIM DO IN ALL MY CHILDHOOD

HE OFFERED TO GO ON A WALK WITH MY MOM TO GET HER OUT OF THE HOUSE WHEN SHES DISTRESSED COS OF MY SISTER Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
omg

My mom and dad are watching a horror Показать about where parents go crazy and try to kill their children and my dads like "Its like your husband" Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
At least we now know hes aware Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
I... Kinda have my concerns about your father watching Horror Shows... Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
^Eh... hes a child Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
What I planned on doing:
-Get all the last Z Crystals in Pokemon
-Write another piece to my stories
-Write RPs
-Relax
-Play Hitman and other Steam
-Take today off to relax and have fun as I rejected activities to do so

What I got done:
-Six scholarships
-Researched and planned out еще of my college stuff
-Got my Health homework done
-Researched Болталка stuff
-Finished two essays for an application
-Finished everything I can do right now for Davis Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I had a super productive day, but Im not satisfied since I barely got anything at all I planned today done XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I did one post to the RP and like... Kinda took some Flight Rising time but thats not really there either? XD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
UC Davis: For a chance at a $1000-4000 scholarship, write an essay on your leadership experiences and how it affected Ты and will continue to help Ты in the future

Me: *flips through 900 things I could talk about cos leadership has played a major role in my life and Im super thankful for it and very passionate over it* Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Dude, Id write a 14 page essay on Leadership for free сука Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like I literally might even be dead if I never found myself in a leadership position some how. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
PLUS IF THEY ACCEPT ME THEY WILL BRING ME IN FOR AN INTERVIEW AND I LIKE THAT KIND OF STUFF ESPECIALLY IF ITS ON THE TOPIC OF LEADERSHIP Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Personally, I dont really believe too much in not chasing what I want. Its part of the reason I cant sit and relax too much, but if I determine I want something, I weigh out how badly Im willing to want it, then charge full on ahead.

I make excuses from time to time, but if I cant get something done in the long run, its often capable to blame myself for not taking action. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
At least partially blame myself that is. There is a level of rationality to how much one can and cannot control Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, I personally wonder where I stand on the trauma scale. I know I probably fit under the "traumatized" title, but I dont really know if I actually fit one of the trauma disorders. Its something Ill probably ask my therapist или psychiatrist about at some point. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I'm probably a lot better now. Had a really bad moment related to shitty stuff of the past and all but direclty after a lot of the depression and massive amounts of anxiety withdrew for the most part. Ive been shakey when I wake up for the past few days, but I think Im good so for anyone worried или concerned, I should be fine.

Thank Ты so much to everyone who watched out for me and helped. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Some part of the whole fiasco with Wanta 'triggered' something I think and it kind of let еще of my really bad mental state thats usually disappears when Im online carried in Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Im back to normal I think. And now that I see a massive unprocessed wound, Ill probably take goals to addressing it in my Далее therapy session and individually on my own. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
It is certainly good to know about the progress that has been made and will continue to do so. For the both of you, I hope. Always here when needed, Riku. We Любовь Ты too !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
We officially have a baby bird. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
NOICE! A NEW MEMBER IN THE FLOCK! CONGRATULATIONS, FANPOP'S LOCAL BIRDKEEPER !!!! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
We might have two Больше года
GDragon612 прокомментировал(-а)…
congrats riku our birdmum =D *throws confetti and open a bottle of chamapaigne*, for the non alcoholics сок xD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
#StartingTheHitmanSeriesFromTheLastGame Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly though.

Akashi I am officially going to call my Избранное character from now on. He super deserves it. He absolutely does deserve it. Outside of loving the character, he has always been consistently a significant figure in helping me process and work through issues, helping me make the right decision, calming down, self reflecting, etc.

And fun fact, his Видео can calm down one of my poor mental states so quickly and successfully Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
That I have this thing on my phone called "Emergency Akashi" since I could be in a really bad mental state and if I recognize it, Akashi Видео can almost always return that bad mental state to AT LEAST a neutral или calm and managable mental state Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Even if his character sucked ass, the fact one fictional item could have helped me so much through my mental health journey and all, it alone is deserving of it Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Yeah Im doing better now but honestly, I still need to take time to chill. Who knows I might wake up and have another bad time или something. I cant be sure but Imma take it somewhat easy. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I apologize if it takes me a bit to get back to being my old energetic and peppy self I like to be on here and usually am.

The Последнее events through me into a bad loop and pool that might take a while to fully get out of.

Im alright though. I just don't feel in the right place to have the energy and exorbitant positivity I usually do. Its not anything Wanta did или anything Im pretty sure.

Thank Ты to everyone that has been putting effort into this situation and helping me out. Опубликовано Больше года
Zeppie прокомментировал(-а)…
Take all the time Ты need. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
It is understandable really. Take your time, Riku !!!! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Feeling better ish rn Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
A little Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Figuring out which Akashi Иконка to use when Ты have so many is hard. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Literally every time I want to display a new Иконка showcasing избранное of mine. It takes a while !!!! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
For me I have to like the Иконка and have that feeling like my mood at the moment likes the Иконка either cos it represent it или because it soothes или it just feels fitting at the time Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Its liking it and then finding one that I feel is kinda nice at the moment and like the look of how it looks when I post Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Same here XD Relatabilty is a major factor when I am going to display an Icon. It makes things all the еще harder honestly with such a variety !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I can always rely on Akashi and KnB to neutralize shitty mental health crap. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Болталка Anxiety: "I want to die."

Me: How about no Ты over-dramatic sensitive edgelord? Take your damn жопа, попка medicine Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I don't have time this morning to read through the uh... five или six messages since on early start days I always wake up for just barely enough time to work through my regular routine.

But I see there is a lot of misunderstanding the in meaning and intent of the words.

And also, I figured with how often Ive talked about my issues with relationships with other people before addressing it with them to Ты specifically, that Ты knew the difference between mine and Zeppie's stance Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I dont believe in going directly to the friend if the situation is serious или important enough. Doing that is how Ты make bad, emotional, and irrational ideas off of current feelings. For major and very important issues, it is best to go to other people for Совет and a секунда opinion. Ive always lived by that and only kept my avoidance of following it for Zeppie in specific since she gets majorly hurt by it otherwise. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I wanted to say that one for everyone who reads this. Больше года
BlindBandit92 прокомментировал(-а)…
Honestly I might be out of turn. But if something is really important. I wouldn't make an exception. It might seems like I would be a dick или something. But I rather be a dick than let a problem fester with no easy way или solving it. Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
Feel free to say your peace as much as Ты like, Blind. Riku apparently won't talk to me about it for another час so...*shrug* Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Everyone gets all upset when things that aren't directly related to the story in Pokemon games are not post game. I loved Присоединиться Avenue from Black 2 and White 2. I loved where they placed it and found it entirely relevant and helpful Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Ты know, one of the shittiest things about mental health, especially as a kid and teenager, is that it steals away your childhood.

A lot of people have good memories of their high school life, they remember the fun with their friends, they remember all the fun risks and activities they did...

But when it comes to mental health, Ты just kind of have all those times stolen.

I personally realize... As a senior, I'm far too late to regather them

But Ill cherish what I have. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ill be happy that I have it right now and not let what I have left go to waste because of what I already Остаться в живых Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I do wish I could have my childhood back, heck I wish I could REMEMBER my childhood again, but theres no point in crying over spilt milk. Past is past, its time to accept it and Переместить on. Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I owe people in my highschool еще credit and appreciation than I give them since I've spent most of my time around them being a reserved, angsty, emotionally-scared child.

Like one of my Друзья from 7th grade... never really opened up at all to him. Apparently I was a huge inspiration and role model for him. We talked a lot but it was really one sided

или the trumpet brother of mine I'm not dating. He dealt with so much of my stupid jokes and I Любовь him. Hes family. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Those two really helped me out even if it was no where near direct. Honestly, they both opened their doors to me if I ever needed to escape my house even though they dont even know the tiniest tip of the iceberg of how horrible my house can and could get Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ill be honest. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
For the first time, Ill say it. I will miss them. I will be sad. But its not bad. Its kind of nice. Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Geesh. Lucy - The Eternity She Wished For is a super sad story

#FeelsBad

#Sad Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
College: Has your dad been physically present in California for at least three years-

Me: Not emotionally present but sure I guess hes been physically present Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
"And squaring numbers are just like women, if they are under thirteen just.. do them in your head" ~ Bo Burnham Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Thats actually going to be my клубы new quote Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
True, I suppose !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
My body is so damn worn out XD

Going to the fitness center for like 45 минуты is always good for when the brain is being stupid. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
#Relatable !!!! Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
It is great to know Riku. Exercise will do Ты pretty good !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Heres to never having heard your dad ever say the word "love" "care" или "proud" to Ты in a positive way over the seventeen almost eighteen years of being alive.

Heres to him instead liking to get violent and yelling when anyone even remotely asks for him to say something remotely similar to it

Heres to him getting your therapist to give up after thirty минуты of being asked to compliment you. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
At the very least I get "good jobs" here and there for doing good things regarding his money and my money. Its something. Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
TFW Ты get hit by a sudden wave of mild depression and anxiety and are about to post about it

Then realize Ты forgot to take your anxiety medication this breakfast and thats probably part of it. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, I dont think I can watch the new season of Сверхъестественное или really much of any of it until I deal with my issues entirely.

It brings back bad flashes of really bad coping mechanisms and mental states I used to way too heavily relate to back when I practically binge watched it.

Sam and Dean are strong members of my relatable character list, but theres a reason for it. Some of those Цитаты hit way too close to Главная and their dynamic feels too personal. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like anyone else get that 'flash' feeling in their head when something reminds them of something unpleasant или tempts to bring Ты back into a Назад bad mental state? Like Ты dont actually fall back to it, but Ты feel the pull for a секунда in your head and its kinda uncomfortable but not immensely so? Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Like a mini panic of a warning? Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
XD this is just a Вопрос for anyone XD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
@Me a год назад saying "Am I the only one that wonders when my signature would randomly become something fancy? Like adults seem to always have one (parents and all) and some of my classmates have one then theres me thats all like "What is cursive?"

Yes, it did happen. I dont know when but it did Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly going through my Стена for an Статья is interesting cos firstly, this Иконка makes all the posts super hilarious and secondly, because Im really realizing how horrifically depressed I was.

Even еще shocking since I actually tried not to post it on here too much and to keep it subtle.

Honestly super concerned for my past self Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Me: Okay I literally wasted an час of my time doing the most stupid and wasteful things. Before I can feel comfortable doing osmething slightly unproductive but also not stupid and wasteful, I have to do something fully productive. *groan* Ugh fine Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Flights Rising is literally the largest waste of my time but I still do it so much XD Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
That's me with whatever Болталка app has my interest for the месяц XD Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, I have a weird relationship with change. I hate change coming into my life up until it hits me and there is no return. Cos once I jump straight into it или get run over by whatever change came my way, I just kind of go 100% into it and embrace it to the point I Любовь it.

Im someone really happy and comfortable with my natural normal schedule, but Im also someone who likes to take change as an opportunity to massively fix things. So its just interesting. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Im officially committed to UC Davis XD

God I have to many massively long trips coming up in the future Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
That is great to know. Wish Ты all the best Riku. Have a good progress most of all !!!! Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Pokemon knew what they were doing when they let Ты name your rival. Honestly it's the most cathartic release. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
IM FINALLY Главная AFTER A 15 час ROUND TRIP OF DRIVING OVER A LIKE 35 TRIP OVERALL.

IM FINALLY NOT SITTING

...

and Im back at my computer. :) Nice. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Maybe even 16 hours idk XD Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Welcome back XD !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, being a "leader" is a great feeling and isnt something Id really ever want to give up. I always Любовь having a team that I can work with and helping them / maximizing their potentials and getting work done and all.

Plus the respect and ability to influence another person's life positively is always nice. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Watching a PS4 gamer try PC Gaming for the first time is hilarious. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Currently off in Davis checking out UC Davis today and tomorrow. Took like... an eight час drive to get here but Im here. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
link

Please do take and enjoy.

Wanta and I put a lot of work into it XD Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
I certainly did enjoyed it. Well done, to both of Ты !!!! Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Riku confirmed that Professor Oak is a Totem Pokemon in Pokemon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon and can be unlocked with a sticker. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
There is something really wonderful about learning about yourself in all ways possible. Looking deep inside yourself and finding all the good, bad, weaknesses, and strengths and accepting them. Its really wonderful to be honest.

I never loved myself еще than when I started doing this.

It hurts like Lucifer's wrath on steroids at first, but the longer and longer Ты do it... the еще magical and wonderful and secure and confident Ты feel. Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
It is certainly wonderful recognizing that. As I сказал(-а) before, pretty admirable !!!! Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Seeing Ты making those positive remarks alone feels pretty satisfying to me as well :') !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
God Im tired XD Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Being tired honestly isnt good for my mental state Im guessing. Go wonder XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Im alright tho. Its just amusing the amount of intrusive thoughts Ive been playing baseball with Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
#StrikeAllThoseHomeruns Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Relatable XD !!!! Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Riku is oppressing me! Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Never name your Pokemon after mental issues.

Duskull used Foresight.

Codependance was identified.

Me: "...." Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
:v Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly, if I got into Harry Potter, Id probably fall in Любовь with Snape. The issue however is that Harry Potter is everywhere. After звезда Wars and Kylo, I fear having two Популярное series holding characters I Любовь Опубликовано Больше года
BlindBandit92 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ты would Любовь Snape. Snape would be hands down your favorite. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
He currently is from the little, tiny bit I know from the series XD Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^^ I agree about Snape as well. He certainly is your kind of Character XD !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Jeesh. Yuki Kajura is an amazing composer. Pandora Hearts OST, Fate OST, Madoka Magica OST, Sword Art Online OST, Tsubasa Chronicles OST.

Those are all some of my Избранное works geesh.

*knows еще Аниме osts than animes* Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
I have listened to some of them and I agree that there are quite a few amazing Tracks. Pretty interested to check out the rest !!!! Больше года
BlindBandit92 прокомментировал(-а)…
You've listened to the fate ost even though Ты haven't really seen the anime? LOL Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ты continue to sin, Riku. Not that I cannot understand that but still LOL !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
I decided and I am committing to it.

I am going to process through my trauma and try to see if I can clear the fog on my memories and bring back, experience, remember, and accept what happened for everything it is.

Its not going to be fun, but I want to be able to pull myself back together before I leave off to college.

Honestly the hard part is though I only get really bad over my trauma when its abruptly brought up. I dont really get connected to it much on command Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
The thing about trauma though, especially at a young age, is that it steals away a lot of yourself and a lot of your ability to be an entire person. Ты forget a lot. Ты loose your history and your past. Ты loose your childhood. Ты loose your sense of identity. Ты become a grandly incomplete person Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I really cant be me at my full potential until I work through it fully so as much as I hate it, I want to do the most with my life. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
That is quite an admirable way to look at things, Riku. Making peace with the past is a major step towards one's Improvement. I too believe Ты can do it. There is no doubt about that !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Honestly one of the things i appreciate the most in Друзья and people close to me are people who have experienced stuggle and can manage and handle it well.

I really appreciate and like that since they usually do good with Совет and keeping me under control when Im at my worst. c: Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I often, especially in thr past, need people who can handle and keep things in a good perspective while keeping me from doing anything stupid off of stress или anything Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Cos I can lack self control at times and have too many demons on my shoulder. Its kinda why I like Lefteris a lot. Hes my "positive echo chamber". Hes full of nice health lines to encourage positive growth. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
I am all about encouraging one's Growth XD It helps when I feel myself strongly relating with сказал(-а) person. I am always here for you, Riku ^_^ !!!! Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
DUDE. POKEMON GENERATIONS LOOKS SICK.

THEY A ADDRESSED POKEMON BLACK 2 AND WHITE 2 SCENE SO NICE.

IMMA WATCH IT. Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Wantadog's depressing introspective about Love.

Любовь is nice when Ты think of it like "Oh two people who were meant for each other" but sadly the case is that when they say true Любовь is one in a million, they mean it. 90% of relationships are not true love. 90% of marriages are not true love. 90% of true Любовь CASES are NOT true love. Odds are no one here has even seen "true love" in action. Опубликовано Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
"Love is not equal" Больше года
wantadog прокомментировал(-а)…
I won't dismiss someone else's relationship, but my statement on the main post holds true. Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
^ I'll have to agree with it !!!! Больше года
wantadog сказал(-а) …
Three cheers for depressing yourself by asking for the impossible Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Also, Im a really strong advocate for taking medication for mental health issues, especially when it starts to get too extreme.

Taking medication for anxiety, no matter how much actually thinking about taking it gave me еще anxiety, was probably one of the best decisions of my life

It lowered how bad my anxiety got to a manageable level. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Personally before I got it, I got the horrible feeling like I was going to kill my real self off. It felt like a half assed indirect suicide. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I actually got super suicidal over it I think. But it really helped in the long run. Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
I mean I was already suicidal during that time, thats why my therapist was like "You really need to see a psychiatrist and get medication", but it made it worse Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Ive been on medication for like.... ten months I think now. Its been helpful without a doubt Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Its interesting how Psychosis and Dissociation are commonly seen talked about in the same areas. They are strictly different, but I can see where a lot of the similarities come in play.

Psychosis is a break away from reality, dissociation is a cut off from reality. Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Baujel is such a wonderful character Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
The only issue I have to be honest with Письмо his character is that I by no means depict him by his actual age XD There is no way a kid would act this way at his age XD Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
But sh.. this isnt a formal Письмо peace. I dont have to be that realistic. Its just hobby Письмо and its a side story to depict things. Maybe Im Письмо it how he remembers it so it comes out as еще mature since people have trouble fully making themselves as immature as they were when they think back to their past experiences :v Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
tfw Ты have symptoms of a large portion of mental health issues but write a character whose main issue is the ONE Ты dont so Ты gotta research :v Опубликовано Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
Okay I decided. I will Любовь Lusamine begrudgingly Опубликовано Больше года
TheLefteris24 прокомментировал(-а)…
Riku: I hate you... But I Любовь you... But I hate Ты !!!! Больше года
Riku114 прокомментировал(-а)…
Accurate Больше года
Riku114 сказал(-а) …
But for people that struggle to realize the difference between "OCD" ins a colloquial sense and OCD in a literal diagnosis sense, the single phrase of "If I dont do _____, then ________ will happen / ____ might happen" paired with genuine anxiety if the latter statement occurs to the point it locks Ты into doing the first statement. Опубликовано Больше года