So, I am a big dork and have actually been keeping track of how each person died. I decided to post all the deaths (edited in some cases for easier reading) for anyone who might have missed out. There were some great stories and we have a few serial killers in our midst, myself included :) Thanks to emirc2363 for starting the game. And if anyone has some creative ideas for how a character should have died, feel free to comment!!




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Todd Packer (killed by R-S-Lee): Todd Packer gets really drunk and attempts to hit on Madge in the warehouse. Long story short, Todd Packer ends up being the eleventh person that year to be crushed to death by a bailer.

Meredith (killed by emirc2363): Meredith Palmer is in her home. She has had five too many Apple-tinis and her Sex and the City DVD has finished. She thinks it would be fun to chop up some strawberries for a late night snack. In doing so, the very sharp knife slips and slices her arm, slicing a huge artery and leaving her to die from a huge blood loss. Her son finds her the next morning, but he’s rather happy, because now he can inherit her money. The end.

Roy (killed by ccarter219): While visiting Darryl at the local Hooters, Roy spots Jim and Pam as they are being tossed out of Chili's. Thinking that now is his chance to really get at Halpert without his trusty, mace-toting protector around, Roy storms across the middle of a busy street and is struck by Creed, who has "borrowed" Michael's car while Michael sleeps off a sugar high in the warehouse. Mistaking the thump beneath the wheels for a highway cone, Creed drags Roy twelve miles, then abandon him and Michael's car in the alley behind a soup kitchen.

Katy (killed by swifferkramer): One day Katy goes to another business to sell purses and meets a guy there and hooks up with him (because she's a skank) and they go home to have sex. Later, the man kills her and steals all her purses.

Karen (killed by chel1395): After "The Office" documentary aired, the country falls in love with Pam. One crazed fan takes it quite personally when Karen calls Pam "kind of a bitch" so he hops on a bus to Scranton to find Karen. He walks in to Dunder Mifflin and starts screaming at Karen. Dwight pulls out his nun chucks and starts swinging them around to scare off the guy. Unfortunately, Dwight was eating a greasy burrito just moments before and the nun chucks slip out of his hands, fly backwards, and hit Karen. She is rushed to the emergency room. The entire office staff go to see her at the hospital, where she seems to be doing better...until Creed steals the ventilator helping her breath. Creed buys a new suit (with the money he got hawking the ventilator) to wear to her funeral.

Kelly (killed by growaPEAR): Angela is upset that Dwight is not the Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton because it means Kelly will not be fired. She decides to take matters into her own hands. After days of praying she decides the best way to off Kelly is to send Kelly a faux copy of PEOPLE magazine. All the articles claim her favorite celebrity couples have split (e.g., Brad and Angelina, David and Victoria, Ellen and Portia, etc). After reading this, Kelly is mortified (because who would want to live in a world with out Brangalina) and kills herself.

Jan (killed by R-S-Lee): Jan tries to take back her corporate job by force. Luckily for Ryan Howard, a SWAT team sniper manages to prevent her from throwing the young man out of a window.

Oscar (killed by R-S-Lee): Late one night, Oscar finds himself kidnapped by a man named "Jigsaw". For more details into his gory death, you may want to watch "Saw IV".

Ryan (killed by hannahdawn4): Ryan is brutally murdered by what doctors can only assume was being talked to death. After breaking up with Kelly, she talks for about 3 weeks straight. After she dies he thinks he’ll be all right, until he decides to date Katy. After only one day of her talking, his head implodes. Apparently a person can only take so much.

Angela (killed by supercalo23): Angela was planning a company party as the head of the party planning committee. After becoming angry with the others for their ribbon choices, she decides to take things into her own hands. While attempting to hang up the streamers she slips, gets her neck caught and hangs herself.

Phyllis (killed by happygolucky11): Phyllis is busy making a sweater for her husband, Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration. All of a sudden, her needles "accidentally" stab her in the heart. She dies 12 seconds later.

Creed (killed by caintil31): Creed goes to a party and he smokes a bunch of marijuana. While he's high, he runs into a nearby forest where he gets mauled by a bear.

Darryl (killed by ccarter 219): Michael goes down to the warehouse to invite the guys upstairs for ice cream sandwiches with the office crew and finds a forklift parked in a corner, against the wall of the warehouse. Deciding that the forklift should be parked on the opposite wall, Michael climbs aboard and proceeds to move it. Caught off guard, Darryl steps in Michael's path and is stabbed by the lift.

Kevin (killed by caintil31): During the 2nd annual Dunder Mifflin Office Olympics, Kevin, in hopes of keeping his title, tries to see how many M&Ms he can fit in his mouth. He breaks his record but then chokes on the M&Ms and dies.

Andy (killed by CMichels06): Andy was trying to put Jim’s calculator in jello for payback when his phone rings (tweedely tweedely deet). However, he can’t find it and hits the wall so hard that he breaks a carbon monoxide pipe and chokes to death.

Stanley (killed by happygolucky11): Stanley was excitedly waiting for Pretzel Day when they announced that they couldn't serve them because of a shortage of pretzels in the world and they're feeding them to the starving kids in Asia, Africa, etc. He gets mad and throws himself off the building, not realizing the castle isn't there from when Michael was going to jump. Sadly, he doesn’t survive.

Michael (killed by chel1395): Michael is convicted of vehicular (forklift) homicide for Darryl's death. He ends up in a maximum-security prison (because he annoyed the judge) and immediately takes on the persona of "Prison Mike" to look tough. He quickly finds himself a Dwight-replacement in a squirrelly guy named Cueball. He puts himself in charge of the "Safety Training" seminar at the prison and decides to use his previous method from Dunder Mifflin. With Cueball's help, he rents a bouncy castle and pretends to throw himself off the prison roof. Michael jumps, but the bouncy castle is no longer bouncy. Unfortunately, the other inmates spent the day bouncing on the castle and tore a big hole in it. Michael dies, pretending to kill himself. Cueball throws himself off the roof as well, but is only paralyzed from the neck down. He now runs the Dunder Mifflin branch in Albany.

Dwight (killed by 28spike28): He was at the 173rd Annual Beet Festival and he was challenged to a beet-off and chocked on a piece of beet.

Toby (killed by bribeim): After the tragic death of Dwight, Toby saw no more reason to keep all the boxes of complaints Dwight had made against Jim. While trying to reach the final box at the top of the warehouse ladder, Toby accidentally slips and falls to his death.

Pam & Jim (killed by RandomGirl15): Realizing their office love would never be fully understood by society, Jim and Pam decide that they can only be together in heaven...and that's where they go, as far as the authorities know. I however think I saw a pair of people who looked a lot like Jim and Pam on a beach in the Bahamas...