Jim: Was that you mom?
Dwight: No. That was my sensei.
Jim: Oh, thought it was your mom.
Dwight: I am now sempai, which is assistant sensei.
Jim: Assistant to the sensei, that's pretty cool.
Dwight: Assistant sensei.
Jim: Okay.

and later in the same episode

Jim: Hey, Dwight. As sempai, do you ever think there's gonna be a day where humans and robots can peacefully coexist?
Dwight: Impossible. The way they're programmed...
Dwight: You're mocking me.
Jim: No, I'm not.
Dwight: Well, let me offer you a little piece of advice. I am not afraid, to make an example out of you.
Jim: Well, that's not advice. What advice sounds like is this. Um, don't ever bring your purple belt to work because someone might......steeaal it.
Dwight: Okay, give that back to me.
Jim: Okay, say please.
Dwight: No, that is not a toy.
Jim: Please.
Dwight: Please?
Jim: Good. And it absolutely is a toy. Arigato.
Dwight: Arigato. This is not a toy. This is a message for the entire office so that everyone could see that I am capable of physically dominating them.

characters- Micheal

someone has replaced all of my pens & pencils with crayons. I suspect Jim Halpert

Characters karen, dwight, michael, jim - Women's Appreciation

Karen: Look, it's really simple. We just want you guys to treat us with respect.
Michael: See? That's what we're talking about. Did you hear that, Dwight?
Dwight: Yes. Did you hear that, Michael?
Michael: No, Dwight. Respect. R-E-S-P-svee-T. Find out what it means to me. All right, you know what? That's it. Conference room, five minutes. Women's appreciation.
Jim: Wait a second, how are you qualified for that?
Michael: Oh, I don't know, James. Did I come from a woman? Have I slept with a woman? More than one?
Dwight: [eating banana] Mm, less than three.
Michael: That is not current.
Dwight: You know what? Why doesn't Oscar run the meeting? He's a homosexual.
Jim: Why don't you run the meeting? You play with dolls.
Dwight: Those are collectible action figures and they're worth more than your car.
Michael: You know what? I am the expert. I will conduct it. I know the crap out of women.

Jim and Dwight a benihana christmas

Jim: as ranking number two i am starting 'the committee to determine the validity of the two committees' i am the sole member. the commitee will act on this now.
Dwight: okay this is stupid.
Jim: could you please keep it down, i'm in session. i have determined that this commitee is valid.
Dwight:what? no, no, wait, wait, wait. Permission to join the validity committee.
Jim:permission denied.
Dwight: damn it

Dwight and Jim product recall

Jim: Question? what kind of bear is best?
Dwight: That's a ridiculous question
Jim: False. black bear.
Dwight: That's debatable, there are basically two schools of thought...
Jim: Fact. Bears eat beets. Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica.
Dwight: Bears do not...what's going on? what are you doing?

baysage what episdoe was that?

that snipit is from Conflict Resolution. Micahel is reading off a list of complaints about Jim from Dwight.

characters - michael and dwight.
episode - hot girl


michael: "look out, cocks in the hen house."
dwight: "cocks in the hen house!"
michael: "don't say cocks."
dwight: "okay."

(or something along those lines.)

also, i love the part where pam is reading jim's palm and tells him he has nice teeth.
now THATS true love.

Pam-Jim- Casino Night.....one of the most heartfelt things ever and it was the saddest and most definitely the best conversation ever in my opinion.


Hey.
Hey, how’s it going?
Good. Especially after I took all your money in poker.
Yeah. Uh … hey, uh, can I talk to you about something?
About when you want to give me more of your money?
No, I …
Did you want to do that now? We can go inside. I’m feeling kind of good tonight.
I was just … um … I’m in love with you.
What?
I’m really sorry if that’s weird for you to hear, but I needed you to hear it. Probably not good timing. I know that, I just …
What are you doing? What do you expect me to say to that?
I just needed you to know. Once.
Well, I um … I … I can’t?
Yeah.
You have no idea …
Don’t do that.
… what your friendship means to me.
C’mon. I don’t want to do that. I want to be more than that.
I can’t. I’m really sorry … if you misinterpreted things. It’s probably my fault.
Not your fault. I’m sorry I misinterpreted uh our friendship.

Pam-Karen-The Return...a very simple and short conversation, but one of my favorite because it proved something that I had begun to doubt.


Jim: Hey.
Karen: Do you still have feelings for her?
Jim: [long pause and then he nods] Yes.