I set number seventeen down.

Seventeen.

Seventeen bottles of пиво I have drunk in the past 37 minutes.

Seventeen.

I pick up number eighteen, twist the кепка, колпачок off, and pour it down my throat. It’s tasteless.

I lean my head back against the Стена from where I sit on the floor of my basement.

I see a football. Danny’s football. It used to be Danny’s football. Now it’s just some football my son used to hold, used to play with. It probably smelled like him. Part of me wanted to go pick it up, the other part of me didn’t wanted to be reminded of the last time we played football together.

I pick up number nineteen, and out of the corner of my eye see (Y/N)’s old dolls, something we thought we could use for our little girl someday.

But that’s not going to happen.

I know what happened. I saw their mangled, bruised, broken, dead bodies after their accident.
I pick up number twenty.

Johnny’s Perspective

Oh God how was I going to say this.

The rest of my life depended on this.

She was just perfect. In every way possible. She was beautiful. Kind. Sweet. Funny. Understanding. Just (Y/N).

And I needed to tell her.

Tell her how much I needed her, wanted her, and had to have her. It was a feeling beyond comprehension. It was love.

I needed to tell her I loved her.

So here I am, sitting in the lot, looking at the stars with (Y/N). Doing something I Любовь with the one I love.

I look over at her, her eyes gleaming from the light of the fire.

“(Y/N)?” I ask as I grab her hand.

“Yeah?” She turns to face me.

“I-I think…” I start.

“Just say it,” she smiles.

“I Любовь you.” I blurt out.

She looks surprised for a second. But then she grins.

“I Любовь Ты too.”

“When I look at you, a thousand feelings hit me. Lust. Happiness. Longing. Hope. Faith. Grace. Beauty. Humor. All these words are you, especially this one; love. I Любовь you. еще than Ты will ever know. I can’t go a день without think about you. Not day, еще like a minute. If I could describe how much I loved Ты in word I couldn’t. Infinite doesn’t even come close. Not all. When you’re gone, I’m physically hurting. My сердце drops, my insides go all numb. I can’t think. I’m worrying about Ты when you’re not with me. I couldn’t live to see Ты fall without me catching you. You’re an angel, but every Энджел needs a guardian angel. That’s where I come in. I’d do anything to save you. To be with Ты forever.” He gets down on one knee.

“This was my mom’s,” he mutters. “(Y/N) (Y/L/N), will Ты marry me?”