Дебаты What's your prejudice?

Cinders posted on Oct 15, 2007 at 05:50PM
I was worried about posting this as a pick, or posting this at all, but it's true that we all have at least one. Now I'm not saying you hate a certain group of people, or indeed even if your prejudice determines how you act towards a person at all, but you cannot deny having a little bit of misgivings towards a certain group of people. If the movie Crash has taught us anything, or indeed Avenue Q's (in)famous song, "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" has displayed in a lighter tone, prejudice towards race, religion, sexuality, gender, political beliefs, etc still exist in modern society.

So basically, I'm asking when you meet a person and learn that they are (insert prejudice here), do you become a little more reserved? Maybe a little scared? A little arrogant? A little nervous?

My prejudice (and I admit it freely) is Christians. Until I learn how Christian they are, I become reserved, I have certain misgivings, but I smile and treat them well, "like a good Christian should."

That doesn't mean I'm not friends with devout Christians! I think Christianity is beautiful in principal, but often judgmental in practice. As Ghandi said once, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

Anyways, I know you all have other prejudices. Maybe towards Arabs, or liberals, or conservatives, or blacks, or whites, or scientologists, or Mormons, or gays, or the transgendered, or Mexicans...

Is this a bad topic? I'm just curious. Because anyone who says they are completely unbiased, and unjudging of those different from them is either lying or has never met anyone truly different from them.

Please, no one be offended. Christians are cool. I'm just saying, I'm wary of them. I'm sure you're wary of a certain group of people too.

To judge and fear the different is inherent in our nature, a primal instinct that teaches us survival of the fittest. If they are different, then they are our enemy, and threaten our species. That's our evolutionary logic. But it's intellect, it's compassion, that allows us to overcome this instinct, and allows us to rise above the animalistic urge to fear the different. Once we recognize that we have a prejudice, we can deal with it.

I hope I haven't offended anyone. I know I'm treading on thin ice. This may be politically incorrect, but I believe the world needs more of that.

And as I said to MajorDork, being politically incorrect is telling a racist joke to someone belonging to that race in jest, making light of a stereotype, all in good fun (A little white girl telling an Arab joke to a room full of Egyptians-- and having them laugh at her because they have to respect her audacity). Being racist and hurtful is believing the stereotype of the joke, spreading the stereotype, and advocating for exterminating the race in one form or other (IE, Ann Coulter's plan to "perfect" all Jews and make them Christian).

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Больше года TweenaCat said…
No worries. I have similar feelings too and I'm pleased you have the courage to express them. As DrDevience and I were saying in that pick about crimes realting to religion and race, hating a religion is entirely different from hating a race because people CHOOSE their religion. They do not choose their race.

I am not afraid of Christians and I don't dislike them but if I find out one of my friends belongs to that religion I would look at them in a different light. Some types of Christian are fine and I'm not bothered about them. And I'm not going to lie, Catholicism is my prejudice. I disagree with almost everything that Church says.

Sorry if I offend anyone. One of my best friends ever is Catholic. I just disagree with her beliefs. If you look at my comment on that soapbox article you'll see what I mean. Sorry to be so vague but I hate repeating myself and I don't know how to link.

Talking of which, how do you link from this page? I'm not very good with these things
Больше года DrDevience said…
"I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." - Pretty much my sentiments exactly.

I think Jesus (as he is portrayed in print) was a cool dude. I have, however, only met 2 people in my 50 years on this Earth who actually followed him. Those 2 people I have a great deal of respect for. But, yes, when someone feels the need to let it be known to me that they are a self-proclaimed xtian, I automatically begin mentally cracking my knuckles.
Больше года Kegel said…
I'm having somewhat the same prejudice as I grew up with people in my class who felt the need to try to convert me, reminding me also that I'll go to hell otherwise. So nowadays I am somewhere deep inside still waiting for that to happen when somebody tells me they're Christian, but I have noticed that most people are more reasonable.

A stupid prejudice I have is with Muslim women who wear a head scarf. When I meet any, I feel a bit as if they'd scold me for not wearing one because every woman should wear it or something like that. I feel stupid having that feeling.
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2ntyOnePilots commented…
^ understandable Больше года
Больше года kateliness2 said…
I'm prejudice against those who think that your religion decides your political leeway. It is my belief system on my God and my savior, but dictates nothing on how I feel on issues. I do happen to be pro-life, but that is a personal choice. I have no evil sentiments towards homo/bisexuals that people associate with Catholicism. I also have no sentiments of that kind towards Atheists -2 of my best friends are Atheists. I think women should be allowed to be priests (pastors, whatever floats your boat :), even though it is firmly stated in my religion that they shouldn't be allowed to be. I am against capital punishment, when Catholicism (and most other Christian religions, I believe) are fine with it.
I'm just using myself as an example, but I know plenty of people who are like me.
I judge those who judge me when I say that I am Catholic.
Больше года katiemariie said…
I judge people based on their prejudices. I know I should try to help them overcome their irrational fears and be a good friend to them in the mean time, but I really just want to make funny of them behind their back.

I am prejudiced against drug users. I've been hurt by a lot of drug addicts in my family. I tend to overcompensate for my past enabling tendencies by being too harsh on drug users.
Больше года fairykiya said…
I am prejudice towords gays and athiests.
Больше года Cinders said…
See? I like that we're talking about this. Because if we can admit it, then we're not denying it.

kateliness, fairykiya-- I can understand why you would be wary of atheists who are wary of you. It goes to show the perpetuating cycle of prejudice. You feel that they'll be too quick to judge you as stupid or foolish for believing in God, and you think that they won't want to understand you. I can understand that, truly.

Meanwhile, someone like Kegel would be wary of a Christian because she'd be afraid that the Christians will see her as something beneath them for not being Christian herself. She fears they'll try to convert her, and impose their beliefs on her, thus disrespecting her own personal beliefs.

Excellent, excellent discussion! Please, tell me more!
Больше года kateliness2 said…
I'm not wary of atheists at all. I'm wary of people who think that my religion decides my attitude towards people (like atheists or homosexuals) and my opinion on matters. It does not. My church decides my beliefs on the afterlife and God alone.
:)
Больше года slytherin360 said…
im prejudice to gays sometimes because several movies portray them in a way that they are really not. Im also a bit prejudice about the way people dress. sometimes i feel the way someone dresses determines what social class they are in, and how intellegent they are.. but i know that its not true
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Больше года DrDevience said…
Sly - you've been conditioned by the US propaganda machine.

As far as social class, that is so wrong I can't even begin to tell you... one of the World's top billionaires drives an old Volvo. He loves that car. I used to see Liz Taylor barefoot and in ripped up jeans all the time when I lived in Los Angeles... the list is endless.

As far as Gays go, if anything, I am prejudiced towards them, rather than against them. I find their company much preferable to most heteros. They are fun, open-minded, intelligent... again the list goes on. There are always exceptions to everything in life, but as a rule I find them to be more honest.
Больше года Cinders said…
Good points, Doctor D, but slytherin360 was just answering my question, I don't think that any harm was meant. :o)

Thanks for sharing, slytherin360.
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Больше года kateliness2 said…
Sometimes, I do get prejudicial towards people who do drugs. Most of the time no, but I do compare to the stereotypical drug user occasionally.

Not talking about caffeine here.
Больше года swedezilla said…
I'm prejudiced towards people who claim that they're not prejudicial.
Больше года DarkSarcasm said…
You're a brave one, Cinders. =P

The first thing that came to mind when I saw the forum topic was Christians. My family is full of them, so I've had Christianity and all its lovely little ideas and prejudices rammed down my throat since I can remember. Lucky for me, I actually thought about it one day instead of following blindly. The thing that gets me about Christians is how they believe that everyone must be a part of their religion. Lots of religions have similar beliefs, and it annoys me that they can't just let others believe what they want to believe. Anyway, that was just a little off topic... The point is, I'm prejudiced toward Christians because I've seen first-hand how they try to impose their religion on others. I've got some friends who are devout Christians, but we just avoid the topic of religion.

I'm also slightly prejudiced toward gays... but that's because I found out in high school that one of my best friends was a lesbian and she'd been hitting on me for years. It freaked me out. I don't think they're all doomed to burn in hell, I'm just a little standoffish because of that incident.
Больше года Cara09 said…
I am predjudiced towards some christians, depending on their reactions to me being athiest and their acceptance of others. I am also kind of prejudiced towards people who say "like" a lot when the talk, it just annoys me and they sound so stupid, which they aren't.
Больше года nonames said…
i am prejudiced against EXTREME liberals. Definitely not all liberals. But im from san francisco, and many people are extreme liberals because they consider it "the cool thing to do" rather than understanding what its about. An example, People at my high school would go to the protest rallies because "its fun and there are hot guys/girls". They had no idea what it was about or even care....

but, once i get to know them, usually there are no reservations... coincidentally, my roommate is actually a pretty extreme liberal and we get along great.
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Больше года dazl said…
I am prejudiced towards Northern Ireland Protestants, thats a result of living in the South of Ireland as a Catholic. Its a combination of cultural conditioning and knowledge of history. However, as I get older and wiser, I realise that many of those from the North that I have met are actually as fed up with the whole situation and dislike the hardcore extremists who have fed the tension for years. I also realise that Catholics are also to blame, since it takes two to maintain a war.

I find a deepseated prejudice towards the Irish Travelling community. Its the Irish version of gypsies. They recieve a lot of bad press as drunken and rowdy, to the point where they are banned from pubs and many pubs close if there is a Traveller wedding/funeral on. Its a cultural thing since they pull their caravans into parking lots and settle down illegaly. They litter the area they are using, then move on, leaving their rubbish. There have been instances of Travellers settling near Irish beaches and just defecating on the sand. I dislike them immensely and will cross the road to avoid them. I know its ridiculous to hold this kind of prejudice and is a suppression of an ethnic minority, but its the way I feel.
Больше года blisslikethis said…
ahh way to force us to be honest about our flaws Cinders ;)

the first thing that comes to my mind is right-wingers. but i'm not sure if it's a prejudice, or just a deep-seated animosity towards their political beliefs haha. honestly though, i think my biggest prejudice is against people i consider to look, in my own words "monotonously mainstream". you know the type - wearing every conceivable fashion trend, with a pleasantly vapid look on their face.

i find it hard to imagine that anyone who is so obviously caught up in mass-consumerism and popular culture could have any truly subversive thoughts. i know i'll inevitably be proven wrong, and i do try not to hold this against people. i'm always willing to give people a chance regardless of first impressions, but still, that's my prejudice.
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Больше года amazondebs said…
Great forum as think some political correctness is starting to cause problems

and i kinda get what you mean, it's like my sister is a stereotypical "trendy" and will take an entire day just shop yet she won't bother to watch the news or vote, i don't hate them, they just annoy me

my father is very racist so as a kid i did used to be scared of people of a different race however since actually meeting people of a different race i am not anymore however i will occasionally use an offensive term by accident

the stereotype that i tend to judge is the "chav" social group, i don't know why I'm so judgmental of them but if I'm walking alone at night and theres a few of them i will instinctively try and distance myself
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Больше года blisslikethis said…
i've never heard of "chav" before. care to elaborate?
Больше года dazl said…
A chav is a derogatory slang term in the United Kingdom for a subcultural stereotype fixated on fashions derived from American hip hop such as imitation gold, poorly made jewellery and fake designer clothing, combined with elements of working class British street fashion.

Больше года blisslikethis said…
thanks dazl! i've honestly never heard that before.. i'm not sure we have an equivalent. i mean, we have a similar stereotype, but not really a specific name for it. maybe someone will prove me wrong ;)
Больше года ThinkPink20 said…
I've been wondering what a chav is too! Thanks for clearing that up, dazl!

As much as I try to keep an open mind, I am wary of gay people. I don't even know why, but I am. And I know that you're bisexual, Cinders, and more power to you for that. I've read many of your comments and they are excellent. But always, in the back of my mind, something just doesn't click. I'm trying not to be kateliness's prejudice, because I USED to use my Catholicism as a political crutch, but soon I realized, what can they do? So I've started thinking for myself instead of letting someone else think for me. I've been swayed to the pro-euthanasia side of the spectrum, but I can never quite let my guard down around my gay friends. I'm still trying to figure out why.

Also, people who do drugs. I don't respect their decisions to send their lives down the toilet. I probably never will.
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Больше года ThinkPink20 said…
On a lighter note, country music singers. Too twangy for me.
Больше года Cinders said…
That's absolutely fine, ThinkPink. That's exactly why I started this forum. No one is completely non-judging of everyone, and saying that you are is just denying it. It's how we work through things. Thanks for your honesty. :o)

LOL-- country music.
Больше года blisslikethis said…
there are plenty of people who use drugs recreationally who aren't addicts, ThinkPink. unless you meant addicts, specifically.
Больше года ThinkPink20 said…
No, not addicts specifically. In fact, I think I have a TINY bit more tolerance for addicts than recreational users, because they can't help it as much, they've developed an addiction to the drug. But, that is very SLIGHT. My tolerance for both drug-using groups is very, very, very low.
Больше года knifewrench said…
I kind of prejudge homosexuals sometimes. I actually get along with them just as well as I do with heterosexuals but I'm scared that they might become attracted to me, making our friendship a bit awkward.

About the whole Christianity prejudice thingy.... The reason us Christians go on and on about our faith and are constantly trying to convert you guys is because we are really worried.

I get so damn scared that people I care about are gonna suffer. It's like having a ridiculous cure to a terminal disease (which you are 100% convinced will work) but nobody will listen to you.
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Больше года blisslikethis said…
except you don't know, or at least, not in remotely the same way that a surgeon knows that a heart transplant will save someone's life.

and you really shouldn't say something like "i get along with them", which implies that all homosexuals are the same type of person. that in itself is a prejudice.

ThinkPink, why exactly do you have such a low opinion of all drug users? it seems strange to lump them all together considering they range from cancer patients to meth addicts.
Больше года knifewrench said…
"except you don't know, or at least, not in remotely the same way that a surgeon knows that a heart transplant will save someone's life." I'm 100% convinced God exists and I've never thought otherwise, but that subject is for a different topic.
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Больше года Cinders said…
I understand, knifewrench. Faith can be a form of "knowing."

I'm not here to change anyone's opinions, at least not in this thread ;). I just like people having an open, safe place to share things that may be incendiary in other forums and topics.
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Больше года blisslikethis said…
it's still not the same thing, knifewrench. no matter how convinced you might be, there is no hard evidence that non-believers go to hell. not in the same way that it's proven that say, removing a malign tumour drastically improves a cancer patient's chances for survival.
Больше года Lila856 said…
My prejudice is the REALLY religious people out there . i go to church & 80% of the people there are really judgmental & umm "conservative" . & then when they finish they`re like "but hey it`s not my place to judge!"
Больше года kateliness2 said…
Hmmm... I sort of agree with Lila856. Except I wouldn't call it "REALLY religious" people. I think that there's a difference. I consider myself very religious. As in, I wholeheartedly believe and and go to church each week.

But, I get a bit prejudice to those who use their faith as a way to be extremely closed-minded on political issues and very judgmental.

I think we're saying the same thing... but in different ways ;)
Больше года Cinders said…
I think Lila means zealots. As Shane Botwin tells his uncle of a Christian summer camp: "Can you convince Mom that I'm better off sitting at home all summer than stuck in a classroom full of religious zealots proselytizing a form of fundamentalism that's two clicks away from Jihad?"
Больше года amazondebs said…
erm blisslikthis what the term rudebot? ganster? wigger?
basically there a type of social group like you might say mosher or emo or jock or what ever
ha ha ha thinkpink country singers lol

how is saying i get along with them a predujice? if he knows gay people and he gets along with them then that statement is fine
sorry i just hate PC
yeah thats another predujice of mine really sensitive and PC people i'd rarther listen to someone tell me that i have to convert than have someone tell me i have to say happy holidays to cover my grounds
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Больше года dazl said…
I now have a new predjudice: Mature Students.

This has come from extensive experience these last few months.

As a rule, I like people. They interest and amuse me. Most of the college students my age are lovely, friendly and listen to the lecturers instructions to address questions at the end of the lecture.

Yet it seems that mature students are incapable of hearing this simple instruction. They interrupt constantly and ask pointless questions that have no relevance.

They take all the books from the library when it comes to essays and don't return them until two days before the submission date, so the rest of the year has to scramble to research and write an essay in a day.

They glare at younger students for showing up late, yet expect that they recieve special treatment if they arrive late.

Now, this seems to be the norm in my course, although some are nice and will try to help if you have a problem. I accept that some of these people are trying to better themselves, but they don't seem to accept that there are a thousand other students in the course in college starting at the same level, and that mature students are not above them.

So I wind up my rant. I feel better...
Больше года DrDevience said…
Bleedin' Americans...
Больше года Cinders said…
LOL, Daz, that made me laugh.

The grad students and upper classmen I deal with are actually very accepting and most suffer from senioritis, so they're about as lazy as I am. In fact, I'm more inclined to be prejudice towards Freshmen, particularly if they are blonde and female.

There. I said it. I'm prejudice towards blonde fremale American teenagers. I'm sorry, I can't help it.
Больше года dazl said…
Fremale?

As one of your 'Freshmen', or being PC, 'Freshwomen', I can't give out until next year.

I'll give you an example of why I want to round up mature students (by which, I mean any student aged over 23), due to the presence of three students in my Psychology tutorial, which takes place on the North campus.

All the younger students were there on time, waiting. Fifteen minutes later, three mature students walk in. One climbed over everyone to get to the seat she wanted, another walked up to the tutor five minutes later, and interrupted him to know what she had missed in the last tutorial. The third answered a phone call in the middle of the class.

So there, I'm prejudiced. With good reason.
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Больше года Cinders said…
Yes, Dazl, I forgot, I'm prejudice towards "Fremales" too.

LOL, yeah, those folks sound very pretentious.

You're not very blonde, though, or very American as far as I know, so you're safe.

The reason I'm prejudice towards blonde American freshmen is because it's been MY experience that they are giggly, bubbly and ill-informed. Like my ex-roommate my freshman year.

It's sad, but the stereotype she embodied really ruined it for her peers.

That's not to say I haven't met intelligent blonde American freshmen... but... well...

The ironic thing is, I'm American, with blonde highlights, and I was a freshman last year.
Больше года dazl said…
Lol! Break the stereotype, Cinders!

Thats like our Commerce students, or our Law students.
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Больше года blisslikethis said…
i'm with Cinders.. and i feel a little weirded out by dazl's reference to students over 23 as "mature". i'm not that far off :S.

it's strange that you don't notice the difference in maturity (for the most part) between 18 and 21/22/23 year olds until you're the latter. i put off taking first year Econ until last semester, and in hindsight, it made it worse. it was a 500 person lecture filled with giggling, insipid freshmen who made me want to tear my hair out every time they opened their mouths. i understand that it takes time to figure out university etiquette.. but turning off cellphones, coming to class on-time, not asking stupid questions the prof just answered 5 minutes before, and not spending the lecture gossipping about how cute your tutorial instructor is are pretty damned straight forward.

you might just have an anomalous bunch of "mature" students, dazl, because in general, i find that students tend to improve with time.
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Больше года dazl said…
Sorry, bliss, but mature students in Ireland are defined as anyone over the age of 23 taking an undergraduate course. Its to do with the points system to enter university in Ireland, that they apply until you are aged 23. Then entry is defined by interview.

I'm not saying that freshmen are perfect. I'm just saying, in my experience, that mature students are the ones in my course that have me tearing my hair out.
Больше года amazondebs said…
oh why do you think i died my hair brown?
we have so many blondes at college that really embrace the bimbo sterotype! okay i'm going to be really sexest hear now but i general tend to find that "mature" guy students are maybe lazy but okay where as mature girl students just seem to have a very large opinion of themselves when they talk to younger students
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Больше года greekthegeek said…
christians and conservatives.

I'm a Muslim living in Missouri my whole life so maybe you can see my point?
Больше года amazondebs said…
sorry i am do not know the situation in missouri could you embellish a little?
Больше года dazl said…
Is Missouri in the so called 'Bible Belt'?
Больше года greekthegeek said…
haha yes. it is the Bible Belt. sorry i didn't explain earlier.

Here in Missouri everybody is a hard Christian. the 417 area also is full of meth. (in fact- 417 basically mean "meth capital). People here are conservatives based on their religion. I am a Muslim who is a libral so my ideas are completely different. (sorry about all the labels- it drives me insane also). Every day of my school life I have delt with people saying I'm gonna go to hell and if Osama is my uncle (yes, I got that in pre-k) Not to mention the fact that around here, every corner there's a church. Even Drama in the churches.

Don't get me wrong- I have nothing against Christians. They're very nice people if you meet the right ones. But it's those who claim they're Christian and act nothing like their Christ. In fact, in Middle School Debate, I was debateing about abortion. The opponent was for it and she referred God in her report. Her only being in 8th grade, she reffered to God in a completely horrible manner. In the crossfire- I brought it up. I said, some people don't believe in your God and you're saying that I must believe in YOUR God?. Her answer? Yes, you have to believe in my God. Plus, afterwards I was called a baby/fetus killer.

Больше года knifewrench said…
Wow, seems like there's some really intollerant funk-heads where you live!