1.One день a man noticed that his Credit Card is stolen...But he didn't Сообщить it to Police.
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Guess WHY????? ;D
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Because the thief was spending less than his wife.....Hahahahha!!!!
2.Friend no.1:Hey dude,what are u lookin for so intensly in the keyboard?
Friend 2:I'm playin a game and it says "Press any key to continue".But I cant find the "any" key here...
3.(A teacher to a student)
Teacher:Dave,tell the name of 1 thing that has NOT been used since 10 years...
Dave:Sir,my brain!!!
Teacher:FOOL!!!
Dave:Thats why I told "Brain"...
4.One день a bank was robbed.The robbers succesfully managed to escape from there and hid in a truck.
Thief 1:Boss,I forgot to count how money we stole.!
Thief 2:Yeah boss,I also forgot to count!
Boss:Dont worry,we can find it out in the newspaper tomorrow!!!
5.A teacher was teaching a class....
Teacher:Draw a biagram of Bacteria.
(after 30 seconds)
Dave:Here it is,sir...
Teacher:Where, I cant see anything?!
Dave:Sir u cant see Bacteria without microscope!!!!
(END)
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Guess WHY????? ;D
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.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because the thief was spending less than his wife.....Hahahahha!!!!
2.Friend no.1:Hey dude,what are u lookin for so intensly in the keyboard?
Friend 2:I'm playin a game and it says "Press any key to continue".But I cant find the "any" key here...
3.(A teacher to a student)
Teacher:Dave,tell the name of 1 thing that has NOT been used since 10 years...
Dave:Sir,my brain!!!
Teacher:FOOL!!!
Dave:Thats why I told "Brain"...
4.One день a bank was robbed.The robbers succesfully managed to escape from there and hid in a truck.
Thief 1:Boss,I forgot to count how money we stole.!
Thief 2:Yeah boss,I also forgot to count!
Boss:Dont worry,we can find it out in the newspaper tomorrow!!!
5.A teacher was teaching a class....
Teacher:Draw a biagram of Bacteria.
(after 30 seconds)
Dave:Here it is,sir...
Teacher:Where, I cant see anything?!
Dave:Sir u cant see Bacteria without microscope!!!!
(END)
here is one of my fav jokes-
teacher- students,as a part of literary week celebrations, we have decided to hold a competition!
(children starts to look at each other and whisper)
teacher- silence! the contest is, each день Ты have to read a well known book! and i'll say the names of some well-known books,and those who have read it should raise their hands, and the one who has read most books,will get extra recess time
(children cheers!later at the end of the week)
teacher- how many of Ты read , hamlet?
(the whole class raise their hands!)
teacher-good! now how many has read oddissi?
(again the whole class raise their hands!the teacher is suspicious whether they r lying,so she decides to test them)
teacher- exellent!now how many of Ты have read the biography of aristotile?
(as expected,the whole class raise their hands again!)
teacher- good,but may i inform Ты that there is no book yet,called biography of aristotle?
teacher- students,as a part of literary week celebrations, we have decided to hold a competition!
(children starts to look at each other and whisper)
teacher- silence! the contest is, each день Ты have to read a well known book! and i'll say the names of some well-known books,and those who have read it should raise their hands, and the one who has read most books,will get extra recess time
(children cheers!later at the end of the week)
teacher- how many of Ты read , hamlet?
(the whole class raise their hands!)
teacher-good! now how many has read oddissi?
(again the whole class raise their hands!the teacher is suspicious whether they r lying,so she decides to test them)
teacher- exellent!now how many of Ты have read the biography of aristotile?
(as expected,the whole class raise their hands again!)
teacher- good,but may i inform Ты that there is no book yet,called biography of aristotle?