Гарри Поттер против Сумерек 1000 Reasons Why Harry Potter Is Better Than Twilight

lauracullen66 posted on Aug 27, 2009 at 01:29PM
just start at one and see if you can get 1000

Гарри Поттер против Сумерек 54807 Ответы

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Больше года Ms_Mea said…
HI!!
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
Gemonk, writer's block. :P I'll try writing more now...
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
And night mommy!
Больше года Italktosnakes said…
big smile
HAII!
I Played Quidditch Today.
In the snow :D
Gryffindor Won (After I caught Abbie-AKA the Snitch)
T'was made of awesomeness :P x
2007 days till HPDHpt2 :D;D x
Больше года MissKnowItAll said…
2007 days? That seems a long time...
Больше года Ms_Mea said…
Yay! 2006 days til I'm 16! :P
Больше года Italktosnakes said…
smile
Ha, only 18 till I'm 16 :D x
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
I'm 12, only .... a couple of months 'till I'm 13 in June!
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
I'm fourteen... Same age as Mommy!
Больше года Italktosnakes said…
big smile
I'm fifteen. Can't WAIT to be sixteen >.< :D :P x
Больше года Ms_Mea said…
I can't wait to be 16 because then I can drive :D it rocks being in Canada!
(BTW, if you didn't guess already, I'm 15 :P)
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Больше года Italktosnakes said…
smile
You can drive :O
I can apply for a chainsaw lisence :) x
Plus James comes back just the day before :D
Should be fun ;) x
Больше года Ms_Mea said…
Yay for you Alice :)
And yes, in 2006 days, I'll be legally allowed to drive (well, first I have to pass and get a licence...>.<
XD well, I can apply right now for a licence to drive a BOAT! ha! lol
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
Mea, I'd be excited when I turn 16 because of my Apparation License :P
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
Σ 'αγαπώ This means I love you in Greek. Copy and paste this to all the friends you love. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥



Greek FTW!
Больше года Italktosnakes said…
smile
I'm gonna learn to drive a tractor :) x
And YAY for the day he comes back.
But I think the next weekend will be wayyyy more fun :D x
Больше года Quaila said…
mischievous
'lo! I am here to convert all ye heathens into Mykerinosism! Ye shall all start praying to Pharaoh Mykerinos, or face eternal damnation! O.o

((OOC: Alia has gone loony))
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Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Hai!
Больше года hsmgirl14a said…
I`m in the middle of readin Harry Potter the sorcerers stone. So far my favorite characters are Hagrid and Dumbledore
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Yay! My fav character was potato.
Больше года DracoLuver said…
That's awesome, hsmgirl! How are ya liking the book so far?:) - Oh, and my favorite character is Dumbledore too :D

GUESS WHAT, GUYS! I HAVE MY WORLD ACOUSTIC! *screams so loud that deaf people go deaf even if that doesn't make sense*
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
??????????
Больше года Quaila said…
So how's the amykerinosists doing, lol?
Больше года DracoLuver said…
heart
Ohmygosh, GD! My World Acoustic - Justin's Christmas gift to his fans. He wasn't planning on making the CD, but then he decided he would for his fans. <3 *squeals*
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
I'm watching Annoying Orange again!!! XD And writing FF.
Больше года Quaila said…
mischievous
Sounds exellent Gemonk. ^^ By the way, are you an amykerinosist? O.o
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Больше года GemonkDruid said…
I have writer's block, even though I planned out my FFs. D: How sad is that?
Больше года DracoLuver said…
That happens to me too. I just lose motivation and I noticed that if I think about what I want to write, all the details and sentence structures are amazing, but when I start writing my thoughts down, it sounds like *excuse my language* crap. I need to get a tape recorder, record the things I want to write, and then write it. It sounds tiring, though, so now I just revise loads. >.>
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Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Should I post this as one big one-shot, or in sections? Coz I need something to post for my adoring readers.
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Woops, forgot to post it:

Somewhere on a street in the small town of Forks, a certain whiny Mary-Sue called Isabella Swan (though don’t call her that. Her precious ears can’t take it) walked through her front door, humming happily. Usually she had something not-really-wrong wrong in her life that she would bitch about to herself, but now was a special moment. Why? Because she had just visited her boyfriend Edward Cullen.

Edward Cullen just warmed her up and made the bad and chagrining things in life go away. Kinda like drugs. Except Edward was more perfect than drugs. Edward was even more perfect than perfect. If that was possible.

Sighing at the thought of his scintillating skin, Bella collapsed onto her bed and closed her eyes, dreaming sweet, blissful dreams of Edward and her frolicking in a meadow...

...At first, that is.

The meadow and her precious Edward morphed quickly into a bar she didn’t recognize. Bella whimpered softly and sat down on a seat, waiting for her sparkle-pire boyfriend like the typical damsel-in-distress that she was.

“He’s not coming; he’s gone. Y’know. ‘Gone’.” a voice said behind her. An old wrinkly man flashed her a toothless smile. Bella stared back at him with chagrin. He’s gone? As in dead? Her life was ruined. Waaah.

“Where’s the nearest cliff, sir?” She asked, getting ready to bawl with all her pent-up wangst (not angst. Never angst. Bella’s too ‘cool’ for angst).

“Please, call me Tom. And just go outside and turn to your left. Have a nice day.”

Bella walked outside, in a daze, when suddenly, a red bolt flew towards her direction. Being a Mary-Sue, she squealed, and also being a Mary-Sue, someone protected her just in time. This someone being another old man, this time a taller one with a nicely grown beard.

“Ah, Voldemort,” the old man said calmly. Vold-a-what? Bella thought. “Terrorizing Diagon Alley, now, are we? Seems a bit petty.”

A guy stepped away from the shadows and lowered his black hood. Bella let out a scream. He had pale skin, like Edward’s (*drool*), and red eyes, like a newborn vamp. His face was very weird, like a snake’s face. He was absolutely horrible. Except for the skin. Though it didn’t sparkle.

“Enough with the formality, Dumbledore,” he snapped. “Let’s get on with it. Your momma’s so fat that she’s blocks the sunlight from your house so all your plants wilt and drop dead! DEAD!”

“Bitch, please.” Dumbledore scrunched up his face and exclaimed, “Your momma’s so poor that she’s the chairlady of the Wizarding Beggar’s Association!”

“Your momma’s so dumb that she uses her wand as a toilet plunger!”

“Your momma’s so ugly that my momma is now in therapy!”

“Puh-lease! Your momma’s only in therapy because she’s so fat and dumb!”

Bella backed away slowly and ran away, frantically searching for the cliff that the old man was talking about. She, having clumsy as her only flaw, tripped over a teensy-weensy pebble, rolled down a ditch, and hit her head on a tree trunk, finally stopping. She groaned, longed for Edtard, I mean, uh, -ward, and stood up, inspecting her surroundings.


She was in a forest. A big forest. Except that the trees had no leaves; they were just bare leaves. Even though the two had nothing in common, Bella was suddenly reminded of Edward, his head popping up in her small, psychotic, deserves-to-be-checked-up-on-regularly-by-­a-s­hri­nk mind.

She trudged ahead, ignoring the pain in her leg, or the creepy shadows that the trees cast, or the fact that when she rolled down she accidentally squashed and killed a baby bird. No, all she could think of was joining Edward. Some would call it selfishness. Bella calls it ‘badassness!1!!’

Bella was about to give up on searching for the cliff when she heard voices. Arguing voices. Very mad-sounding arguing voices that could possibly have belonged to serial killers.

“Face it, Max, we’re lost,” grumbled a tall dark-haired boy... with wings. Bella remain unimpressed. They didn’t sparkle. He was followed by five more kids... all with wings. Okay, she admitted. That was slightly more impressive.

“Fang, we’re two-percent bird,” Max said, rolling her eyes. “How can we get lost?”

“I’m hungry, and these woods are scary, and oh my god, who the heck is that?” a winged kid about the age of 12 said. All of the winged kids’ heads whipped around and gasped, making futile attempts to conceal their wings. Their expressions were priceless, or to a normal person they were. However, Bella’s a sooper-speshul snowflake, and to her their expressions were chagrined.

“Um... those are our costumes...” Max stammered.

“But it’s not Halloween,” Bella stated haughtily.

“Er, yah, it’s for a costume party,” a tall blonde guy said.

Suddenly there was a rustle. A giant wolf the size of a bear appeared.

“Seth!” Bella yelled. (Or Paul, or Jared, or Embry, Quil, Sam, Leah, or OMG JACOB!!!1! She couldn’t be fucked to tell properly.)

Several more giant wolves appeared. One of the winged kids yelled, “Erasers!” Why, Bella thought, would they scream out the names of stationary?

Max looked at Fang. “Shall we kick their hairy butts?” she said, grinning.

Fang nodded once. Suddenly the six kids pounced on the pack. Bella squealed and hid behind a bush.

She didn’t dare observe the fight (her fragile eyes couldn’t stand brawling), but she could hear yelps and grunting and the sick cracking of bones. Splat! A werewolf’s head landed right next to her, blood staining her brown jacket. Screaming, Bella ran for it, planning to put as much distance from her and those sick freaks as possible. Back to cliff-searching, she thought...


Bella staggered through the forest, feeling irrevocably tired and lost. She wondered if she could just stab herself with a tree branch instead of finding a cliff. Suddenly, she heard another voice. Not again... she thought. But this voice was friendly. This voice was singing.

“Our breath smelled of cigarettes and alcohol, we walked down the beach, counting every star...”

Edward can compose a better song, Bella thought wangstily. And he could sing better too.

“Hearts beat inside out chest, leaving us gasping for every breath...”

She walked on until she met a clearing in the forest. A band was performing on a wooden platform, with no audience... except for her and two other girls, that is.

One of the girls had messy blondish-brownish hair, and was wearing a t-shirt with wings on it (The whole world is obsessed with wings, Bella thought) and shorts. The other had black hair, and wore a hoodie and jeans. Strangely enough, a goat was with them, tugging on a leash that the blonde girl was wearing.

“Excuse me,” Bella called out. The two girls slowly turned around, their smiles fading.

“Oh, you’re excused,” the black-haired girl snapped. “You’re excused for ruining our fucking show!”

“Yeah,” said the other girl. “And you scared the Doctor.” She bent down and patted the baaing goat.

“Wait a minute,” the first girl said. “You look awfully familiar.”

“I’m Bella Swan. I’m looking for a cliff to jump off because...” She faltered. “Because my Edward died!” she wailed.

“Bella Swan?!” Both girls’ faces contorted with anger. The black-haired girl took out a baseball bat. As did the other girl. Also, surprisingly, the goat turned his head behind and brought out a rusty dagger secured by its mouth.

Bella ran, the trio following close behind. “You won’t need a cliff by the time we’re done with you!” The black-haired one screamed.

“Yeah, what Dancing said,” the other one said. “My name is Commander Elligoat- her awesomeness, and you and your stupid book killed my brain cells. Prepare to die!”
Больше года DracoLuver said…
GD, that was ... beautiful :')

You should post in parts, so if people liek the first one and review it, they'll read the second one too and so on. I think you'll get more people interested and more reviews.
Больше года hsmgirl14a said…
The book is good so far.
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
KK. :D
Больше года hsmgirl14a said…
i meant the book i am reading right now.
Больше года DracoLuver said…
Awesome, hsmgirl. The books get better and better. The first 2-3 were aimed at children, but the plot gets a bit darker and more interesting. :)
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Hah... This is my third anti fic I created.
Больше года emilyroxx said…
I am the eggman, we are the eggmen, I am the walrus. COO COO KA CHOO!!

Random moment there. :)
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
crying
She's only on extended vacation... Nymphadora is only on extended vacation... Nymphadora Tonks is only on extended vacation!
Больше года DracoLuver said…
"We can make the sun shine in the moonlight. We can make it through the clouds to the blue sky. Yeah, I know it's hard, but baby believe me. We can go nowhere but up from here, my dear. We can go nowhere but up, tell me what we've got to fear. We can take it to the sky, past the moon, to other galaxies, as long as your with me baby. Honestly, with the strength of our love, we can go nowhere but up."

Random spam!

Aw, Best, don't worry. She'll come back! *hugs*
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Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Yay, my sis and daughter are back!!!!!!!!
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
*hugs back*
I HATE BELLATRIX! WHY DID SHE HAVE TO KILL NYMPHADORA? WHYYYY??????



Nymphadora Tonks is only on extended vacation.
Tonks is only on extended vacation.
Nymphadora is only on vacation.
She's only on vacation.
She'll come back soon.
Больше года emilyroxx said…
crying
Yeah, she and Lupin are just on their second honeymoon.
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
They're on vacation at Bermuda Triangle, along with Fred, Dobby, Dumbledore, Snape, etc.
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
Yup, Nymphadora Tonks is still alive! SHE IS ALIVE!
Больше года DracoLuver said…
Dumbledore didn't go to the Bermuda - he retired and decided to become the new Santa Claus :P
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
No... he became Tim Allen.
Больше года harrypotterbest said…
Yup.
Nymphadora is alive!
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
Yeah... she moved to Canada, took a Polyjuice potion for a teen, and decided to register to Fanpop under the name harrypotterbest. Ain't that right, SIS?
Больше года GemonkDruid said…
And Pride is Lupin. It all makes sense again!
Больше года emilyroxx said…
sad
Don't worry Best. Percy and Annabeth will set them free when they go back. Nothing to worry about. Unless Blackbeard killed them. Crap.