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Hey! I wrote a beginning of a song.. I didn't like it that much.. so do u think I should continue it?

it's about a break up

(More Than This)
After all that we've been through
Don't Ты let go on me now
I don't want any еще tears
Don't Ты bring me down


Chorus:
I swear I'd give Ты еще that this
If Ты can stay like this
I swear I'd Любовь Ты еще than this
Anything Ты wish
If I knew that you'd let go, oh
 smsooom posted Больше года
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XxKeithHarkinxX said:
It's shitty. and kinda of,bland.

It's really flat,it needs depth to it.

It honestly up to you.
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posted Больше года 
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Exactly
smsooom posted Больше года
brandonaz said:
nahhh it's too boring and unoriginal tbh but if Ты want to be a pop звезда it's no worse than everything else on the radio
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posted Больше года 
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That's what I thought of :/
smsooom posted Больше года
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So scrap it.
brandonaz posted Больше года
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ok :)
smsooom posted Больше года
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@brandon, that's what I thought XD
XxKeithHarkinxX posted Больше года
Solas said:
I don't want to sound mean, but I think there are too many platitudes - stringing cliches together isn't good song writing.

Something else I'm wondering is: why did Ты choose to write about a break up?

I've never written a song before, but if I were to give Ты some Совет then it would be to come up with an original subject. Everybody writes about break ups - be unique! I'm sure you've had plenty of meaningful life experiences that are far еще interesting. :)

Hope this helps a little.
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posted Больше года 
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It did :) Thnx .. :D and I don't know actually why I chose this :P
smsooom posted Больше года
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I didn't think so. That's probably what the problem was. Not to sound cheesy, but you'll probably find it easier to write about something Ты really believe in. Good luck with your song! :)
Solas posted Больше года
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