"We need" means "I want"
"It's your decision" means "The correct decision should be obvious by now"
"Do what Ты want "means" You'll pay for this later
"We need to talk" means "I need to complain
"Sure...go ahead" means"I don't want Ты to.
"I'm not upset"means "Of course I'm upset, Ты moron."
"You're...so manly "means" Ты need a shave and Ты sweat a lot."
"You're certainly attentive tonight." means "Is sex all Ты ever think about?"
"I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting!" means "I'm on my period."
"Be romantic, turn out the lights" means "I have flabby thighs."
"Hang the picture here" means "No, I mean hang it there!"
"I heard a noise" means "I noticed Ты were almost asleep"
.
"Do Ты Любовь me?"="I'm going to ask for something expensive."
"How much do Ты Любовь me?"= "I did something today you're really not going to like.."
"I'll be ready in a minute."= "Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V."
"Is my butt fat?"="Tell me I'm beautiful."
"You have to learn to communicate."="why don't Ты Just agree with me?!"
"Are Ты listening to me!?"="[Too late, you're dead.]"
"Yes"="No"
"No"="No"
"Maybe"="No"
"I'm sorry"="You'll be sorry."
"I'm not yelling!"="Yes I am yelling because I think this is important."
"Can't we just be friends?"=" There is no way in hell I am going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine, again."
I just need some space"="...without Ты in it"
"Can Ты help me with my homework?"="If I keep whining, the fool will do it for me."
"Do I look fat in this dress?"="We haven't had a fight in a while"
"No, pizza's fine"="Cheap bastard"
"I just do not want a boyfriend now"="I just do not want (you as a) boyfriend"
"I don't know; what do Ты want to do"="I can't believe that Ты have nothing planned
"I don't really mind where we eat"="....As long as it's in the place I've already decided on"
"I like Ты but..."="I don't like you"
"We're moving too quickly"="I am not going to sleep with Ты until I find out if this guy in Bio has a girlfriend"
"I'll be ready in a minute"="I AM ready, but I am going to make Ты wait because I know Ты will."
"Oh Yes! Right there"="Well, near there; I just want to get this over with"
"I'm just going out with the girls"="We are gonna get sloppy and make fun of Ты and your friends"
"There's no one else"="I am doing your brother"
"Size doesn't count..."="unless I want an orgasm"
"It's your decision" means "The correct decision should be obvious by now"
"Do what Ты want "means" You'll pay for this later
"We need to talk" means "I need to complain
"Sure...go ahead" means"I don't want Ты to.
"I'm not upset"means "Of course I'm upset, Ты moron."
"You're...so manly "means" Ты need a shave and Ты sweat a lot."
"You're certainly attentive tonight." means "Is sex all Ты ever think about?"
"I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting!" means "I'm on my period."
"Be romantic, turn out the lights" means "I have flabby thighs."
"Hang the picture here" means "No, I mean hang it there!"
"I heard a noise" means "I noticed Ты were almost asleep"
.
"Do Ты Любовь me?"="I'm going to ask for something expensive."
"How much do Ты Любовь me?"= "I did something today you're really not going to like.."
"I'll be ready in a minute."= "Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V."
"Is my butt fat?"="Tell me I'm beautiful."
"You have to learn to communicate."="why don't Ты Just agree with me?!"
"Are Ты listening to me!?"="[Too late, you're dead.]"
"Yes"="No"
"No"="No"
"Maybe"="No"
"I'm sorry"="You'll be sorry."
"I'm not yelling!"="Yes I am yelling because I think this is important."
"Can't we just be friends?"=" There is no way in hell I am going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine, again."
I just need some space"="...without Ты in it"
"Can Ты help me with my homework?"="If I keep whining, the fool will do it for me."
"Do I look fat in this dress?"="We haven't had a fight in a while"
"No, pizza's fine"="Cheap bastard"
"I just do not want a boyfriend now"="I just do not want (you as a) boyfriend"
"I don't know; what do Ты want to do"="I can't believe that Ты have nothing planned
"I don't really mind where we eat"="....As long as it's in the place I've already decided on"
"I like Ты but..."="I don't like you"
"We're moving too quickly"="I am not going to sleep with Ты until I find out if this guy in Bio has a girlfriend"
"I'll be ready in a minute"="I AM ready, but I am going to make Ты wait because I know Ты will."
"Oh Yes! Right there"="Well, near there; I just want to get this over with"
"I'm just going out with the girls"="We are gonna get sloppy and make fun of Ты and your friends"
"There's no one else"="I am doing your brother"
"Size doesn't count..."="unless I want an orgasm"
Why did I get divorced????
Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do Ты mind if I goin to the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 минуты later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling,"SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.
Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do Ты mind if I goin to the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 минуты later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling,"SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.