I slammed the door behind me, and started up straight to my room.
"Oh! You're home!" Blair сказал(-а) cheerfully. "How was your first день of middle school? Did Ты have fun? Did Ты meet any new friends?" Why couldn't she just shut up?
"No. Leave me alone," I snapped, and went to my room, slamming the door once again. I paced back and forth, taking deep breaths. Calm down, calm down, I told myself. There's no use in getting upset. That wasn't going to change anything. There was a knock at the door.
"Shelby?" Paige stuck her head in. I turned away from her, and wiped my angry tears away with my sleeve.
"Go away."
"What's wrong?" she asked. I wanted to scream. "I'm guessing Ты had a bad day..."
"Wow. You're a genius," I сказал(-а) coldly.
"What happened?" I sat down on my bed, bringing my legs to my chest, and rested my face on my knees, that stung from the scrape.
"All the people are assholes, there's a lot of homework, and I don't even get it! It's so hard! Why do I have to go to school?" Paige could only shrug. I sniffed. "How's high school?"
"Ok," she said. "No one really knows I'm supposed to be in a higher grade though... I'm sure it must be pretty bad for you, being a tenth grader, in a sense, in eighth grade." I nodded.
"I don't want to go back," I whispered, then buried my face on in my legs. "I hate it. I hate it already, and it's only the first day."
"It'll get better..."
"No it won't. Please," I looked up at her. "Don't make me go back there."
"I'm not the one Ты have to talk to. Blair is, and Ты know she'll just make Ты go anyways..." I bit my tongue, to keep myself from sobbing right there. I kind of felt like I was Актёрское искусство like a baby, but I didn't care. This was a bunch of changes, and it was so hard to keep up with. Paige patted my shoulder, then got up and left. I laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.
Just a few months ago, my family was practically living in poverty, and struggling to get by. Now, my sisters and I lived in a big house with our relatives, and could probably get anything we wanted just by asking for it.
Why was I so dissatisfied with this?
I covered my eyes with my arms, and held my breath. Wanting to scream and let it all out, but not wanting to worry everyone downstairs. I'm such a complainer. Things could be perfect here, if I'd just let them. I was too busy thinking about the past, and what could've been our future. I wasn't being thankful for Blair and James, for letting us stay with them. For giving us a house, food, clothes, and anything else we could possibly want.
Everything I've wanted all along.
I let out a big sigh. I wanted to stop being like this. I didn't want to make Blair and her husband feel bad for not making me happy. After all, they could've just turned us away when we'd shown up on their doorstep. I vowed to myself I would be happy. I'd let them see that I was satisfied with all that they were providing for me.
или at least let them think it.
I nodded to myself, thinking. I wouldn't let anyone know how dead I was inside anymore. It wasn't their problem, so I wouldn't burden them with mine. As far as others were concerned, I'm totally fine with all the hectic things going on in my life. I didn't want them thinking I was unhappy, and I didn't want them pitying me.
I'm done having people feel sorry for me.
**********************************************
Sorry I haven't updated in a while. School sucks XP
"Oh! You're home!" Blair сказал(-а) cheerfully. "How was your first день of middle school? Did Ты have fun? Did Ты meet any new friends?" Why couldn't she just shut up?
"No. Leave me alone," I snapped, and went to my room, slamming the door once again. I paced back and forth, taking deep breaths. Calm down, calm down, I told myself. There's no use in getting upset. That wasn't going to change anything. There was a knock at the door.
"Shelby?" Paige stuck her head in. I turned away from her, and wiped my angry tears away with my sleeve.
"Go away."
"What's wrong?" she asked. I wanted to scream. "I'm guessing Ты had a bad day..."
"Wow. You're a genius," I сказал(-а) coldly.
"What happened?" I sat down on my bed, bringing my legs to my chest, and rested my face on my knees, that stung from the scrape.
"All the people are assholes, there's a lot of homework, and I don't even get it! It's so hard! Why do I have to go to school?" Paige could only shrug. I sniffed. "How's high school?"
"Ok," she said. "No one really knows I'm supposed to be in a higher grade though... I'm sure it must be pretty bad for you, being a tenth grader, in a sense, in eighth grade." I nodded.
"I don't want to go back," I whispered, then buried my face on in my legs. "I hate it. I hate it already, and it's only the first day."
"It'll get better..."
"No it won't. Please," I looked up at her. "Don't make me go back there."
"I'm not the one Ты have to talk to. Blair is, and Ты know she'll just make Ты go anyways..." I bit my tongue, to keep myself from sobbing right there. I kind of felt like I was Актёрское искусство like a baby, but I didn't care. This was a bunch of changes, and it was so hard to keep up with. Paige patted my shoulder, then got up and left. I laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.
Just a few months ago, my family was practically living in poverty, and struggling to get by. Now, my sisters and I lived in a big house with our relatives, and could probably get anything we wanted just by asking for it.
Why was I so dissatisfied with this?
I covered my eyes with my arms, and held my breath. Wanting to scream and let it all out, but not wanting to worry everyone downstairs. I'm such a complainer. Things could be perfect here, if I'd just let them. I was too busy thinking about the past, and what could've been our future. I wasn't being thankful for Blair and James, for letting us stay with them. For giving us a house, food, clothes, and anything else we could possibly want.
Everything I've wanted all along.
I let out a big sigh. I wanted to stop being like this. I didn't want to make Blair and her husband feel bad for not making me happy. After all, they could've just turned us away when we'd shown up on their doorstep. I vowed to myself I would be happy. I'd let them see that I was satisfied with all that they were providing for me.
или at least let them think it.
I nodded to myself, thinking. I wouldn't let anyone know how dead I was inside anymore. It wasn't their problem, so I wouldn't burden them with mine. As far as others were concerned, I'm totally fine with all the hectic things going on in my life. I didn't want them thinking I was unhappy, and I didn't want them pitying me.
I'm done having people feel sorry for me.
**********************************************
Sorry I haven't updated in a while. School sucks XP
"Oh my gawd! Lauren, Ты like Jack?!" сказал(-а) Koshi. I blushed and replied,"... Yeah, so what?" she gave me a puzzled look, and then she caught up with my Вопрос of curiosity and rolled her eyes and said, "So what? Do Ты even know the reason why it's a problem?" I shrug and say, "No," her face starts to get red like a cherry. I пересекать, крест my arms, and shifted my weight on my left leg. "Why? Is it a problem if I like Jack?" Koshi looked down and looked at me like I should've heard."He wasn't a good boyfriend." I raised my eyebrows.What? Why hasn't anybody told me that Koshi and Jack were going out? Why? "Oh.My.GAWD!"