Credit: f***yeahslytherin.tumblr.com
I found these fascinating, thought Ты guys might too, :)
And yeah, it's not ALL Death Eaters, but they're all Slytherins, :P

Bellatrix - “Bella” is a construct of the word “bellum” meaning “war” and “trix” refers to “a woman in power.” Bellatrix is therefore known as the “Female Warrior” and is also the pale yellow звезда indicating the left shoulder of the constellation Orion, the Great Hunter.

Blaise - Blaise was the teacher of Merlin. From the Roman name Blasius, which means “lisping.” From the Latin “blaesus.” A famous bearer...

Credit: mugglenet.com

Greetings, new follower:

If Ты are Чтение this letter then Ты have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If by some unprecedented chance Ты are Чтение this and Ты have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest Ты put down this letter and leave now, или the consequences for Ты will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.

Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which Ты must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate...

Credit: mugglenet.com

1. Make him take a shower.

2. Make him use shampoo in aforementioned shower.

3. Make him use clarifying shampoo.

4. Apparate Далее to him, hand him a tube of super-strong facial cleanser, then quickly Disapparate before he realizes what happened.

5. Enchant this cleanser to follow him around until he uses it.

6. ...enchant the cleanser to follow him around anyway.

7. Tell him Ты украл, палантин his teddy bear.

8. Tell him Ты won't give it back until he agrees to wash his hair.

9. When he washes his hair, tell him Ты were just kidding and сказал(-а) teddy медведь has already been destroyed.

10. Sneak...

I suspect I'm not the only one, am I? XD...... Anyways, Ты know you're obsessed with Bellatrix when....
Credit: Me Myself and I

1. Ты throw away all of your hairbrushes.

2. Ты wear at least some black every day.

3. Ты rip your clothes on purpose.

4. Ты call people Ты don't like "filthy mudbloods".

5. Ты yell "CRUCIO!" at people when Ты get mad.

6. Ты carry knives on your person

7. Your desktop background and screensaver are of Bellatrix.

8. Whenever you're typing a word that starts with a "B" или an "L", Ты accidentally type out a Bellatrix или a Lestrange instead.

9. Ты think her birthday should...

I suspect I'm not the only one, am I? XD...... Anyways, Ты know you're obsessed with Bellatrix when....
Credit: Me Myself and I

1. Ты throw away all of your hairbrushes.

2. Ты wear at least some black every day.

3. Ты rip your clothes on purpose.

4. Ты call people Ты don't like "filthy mudbloods".

5. Ты yell "CRUCIO!" at people when Ты get mad.

6. Ты carry knives on your person

7. Your desktop background and screensaver are of Bellatrix.

8. Whenever you're typing a word that starts with a "B" или an "L", Ты accidentally type out a Bellatrix или a Lestrange instead.

9. Ты think her birthday should...

A handy-dandy Wikihow Статья on how to make a horcrux, for all Ты aspiring Dark witches and wizards out there!
Credit: wikihow.com

1. Become an extremely powerful witch или wizard. This will take years of study and sacrifice which lie beyond the scope of a WikiHow article. As a general guide Ты should not attempt to create a horcrux until Ты can cast non-verbal killing curses.

2. Locate an object of extreme significance to you. An emotional attachment to the object will aid the process and make it easier on your body and soul.

3. Bathe in the Water of Sorrows and eat 1 cup of paste made from...

Me, Myself, and I

By Rita Skeeter

Exclusive interview with notorious Death Eater Bellatrix Lestrange

Here I am, sitting in the private dungeon of the notorious Bellatrix Lestrange, most feared follower of the Dark Lord, and having a completely normal interview. Read on to see if there’s еще to Bellatrix than just madness and a nasty reputation!

RS: Hello!

BL: *growls*

RS: Do Ты mind if I use a quick-quotes quill?

BL: What’s that?

*fingers wand handle threateningly*

RS: Oh, nothing, erm, moving on…Can I call Ты Bella?

BL: No.

RS: How would Ты describe your relationship with the man known as...

Its not Mine found it here: link



1. Ask him why he 'doesn't have such a cool scar?'

2. Laugh at him.

3. Wake him up by Пение пляж, пляжный Boys songs in his ear. 'Round, round, get around, I get around...'

4. Knit him things. Really hideous things.

5. Give him kangaroo-ears for a month.

6. Smile during Death Eater meetings and say Ты taught him everything he knows.

7. Chew bubblegum all the time. Should he address you, your only response will be a series of huge bubbles in quick succession, the last of which will burst everywhere and make a mess.

8. Dance the Funky Chicken.

9. Ask him when was the...

Credit: mugglenet.com
I didn't write this, I just thought it was really funny.


1. "What did I ever do to y..oh, nevermind."

2. "Oh, ha ha, Ты got me!! Am I on Punk'd? Where's the camera guy, huh? Where!?"

3. "Wow, you're even dumber than Ты look, and that's saying something. What kind of idiot tells their victim what they're about to do?! I'm ready for Ты now!!" *Prepare yourself by getting into various Matrix positions, beckon him with one finger*

4. "And she's all 'F.Y.I., he's so into me and not you.' and I'm all 'Yeah, right, whatever.' Oh, I'm sorry! Did Ты say something?"

5. "Why do you...

*To the tune of "Dangerous and Moving, By t.A.T.u.. If Ты don't know that song, here's a link: link*

Anyways, Dangerous and Moving, Death Eater style!

We'll take over the world today,
And never give it back,
And this is what the Order members say,
Our lives are evil and black
And this is how we move
And this is how we sway
Danger is the truth
We fell and rose again!

We broke out of Azkaban,
We're perilous and looming
We're dangerous and moving,
We're dangerous and moving!

We’ll burn everything down,
We’re perilous and looming
We’re dangerous and moving,
We’re dangerous and moving

We’ll have no mercy...