Funny Letter Maker

Dear Eva,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but You're a leprechaun. I think I realized it When your dog humped my leg At the mental hospital and I saw Ты Drive over Your "My Little Pony" collection. I'm sure you're Cowardly enough to understand How awful Ты are. I'm returning The диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep Your neighbors dog as a memory. Ты should also know that I Get sick when I think of your feet and Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.
Go молоко a cow
Elli

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xDDD

Dear Spencer,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but you're a leprechaun. I think I realized it when I tripped on арахис масло, сливочное масло in your car and I saw Ты pull the clothes off the Catholic Priest.
I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning the диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep your collection of Бабочки as a memory. Ты should also know that I never will forget that night and the apartment building is on fire.Go молоко a cow,
Tess

dear Louisa
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but our romance is over
I think I realized it When your dog humped my leg At the mental hospital.
and I saw Ты hit on my boyfriend.
I'm sure you're sterile enough to understand How awful Ты are.
I'm returning Your Любовь letters to me to you, but I'll keep Your glass eye as a memory.
Ты should also know that I Hate your cooking and Ты ruined my attempts at another world war.
Go drown yourself!

Dear Freddy,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but the радуга hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when Ты smacked my жопа, попка in your apartment and I saw Ты pull the clothes off the catholic priest. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that Ты need a sex change. I'm returning the диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory. Ты should also know that I im scratching my but as Ты read this and go молоко a cow.

Dear leah,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but Our romance is over. I think I realized it Last год when Ты peed your pants At the mental hospital
and I saw Ты Hit on Your "My Little Pony" collection. I'm sure you're shamed enough to understand That Ты need a sex-change. I'm returning Your Любовь letters to me to you, but I'll keep Your virginity as a memory. Ты should also know that I am better off without Ты and I'm scratching my butt as Ты read this.
Best of luck on the sex change
ami

dear the voices in my head
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but I'm in Любовь with your cat. I think I realized it Last год when Ты peed your pants At the Elton John концерт and I saw Ты Carve your initials into My salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're Scarred enough to understand That your driving sucks. I'm returning The диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep Your neighbors dog as a memory. Ты should also know that I Любовь your sweet, sweet @$$ and The apartment building is on fire.

Dear,Mom (XDD Oh lord)
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but The mafia wants you. I think I realized it When we skinny dipped in the bathtub At the mental hospital and I saw Ты Sit on Your "My Little Pony" collection. I'm sure you're Middle-class enough to understand That your driving sucks. I'm returning The диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep Your virginity as a memory. Ты should also know that I am better off without Ты and Ты ruined my attempts at another world war.
Best of luck on the sex change,
Aydan :3

Dear Jeff,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when your dog humped my leg under a улица, уличный light and I saw Ты hit on the Catholic Priest. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that Ты need a sex-change. I'm returning your pet rock to you, but I'll keep your neighbors dog as a memory. Ты should also know that I will try to forget that Ты broke my сердце and your cucumber-fetishism is weird.
Best of luck on the sex change

Dear Mother, I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but I'm in Любовь with your cat I think I realized it When Ты put cuffs on me Outside of your office, and i saw Ты Drive over The Catholic Priest. I'm sure you're a Cowardly enough to understand That your driving sucks. I am returning Your toe ring to you, but i'll keep Your neighbors dog as a memory. Ты should also know that I Get sick when I think of your feet and Ты should stop picking your nose.

Любовь always

Rosel

Dear My weird friend
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but The mafia wants Ты I think I realized it When your dwarf bit me Outside of your office and I saw Ты Hit on My illegitimate child in Ghana . I'm sure you're Sterile enough to understand That I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning Your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your credit cards as a memory. Ты should also know that I Mocked Ты behind your back constantly and Ты ruined my attempts at another world war.
Go молоко a cow

Dear Mom,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me in your car and I saw Ты castrate the слон in the corner. I'm sure you're masochistic enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your neighbour's dog as a memory. Ты should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the bruises and Ты should stop picking your nose.
Go молоко a cow.

OMG, she has a romance with me? O_O
*is in double shock and faints*

Dear Jaden,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but the радуга hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub at the mental hospital and I saw Ты pull the clothes off my illegitimate child in Ghana. I'm sure you're high enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on Ты . I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. Ты should also know that I Любовь your sweet, sweet жопа, попка and Ты ruined my attempts at another world war.
Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore
Ivan

Dear Dominick,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it When I saw the purple monkey At the Elton John концерт and I saw Ты sit on My salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're sterile enough to understand That I may pee my pants. I'm returning the диван, мягкий уголок cushions to you, but I'll keep The results of that blood-sample as a memory. Ты should also know that I Told in my confession today about the moose poaching and I Любовь Oprah.
Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore,
Ass-Kicker

Dear Austin,
I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but our socks don't match. I think I realized it when I quoted Forrest Gump in your car and I saw Ты carve your initials into your "My Little Pony" collection. I'm sure you're masochistic enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your collection of Бабочки as a memory. Ты should also know that I Любовь your sweet, sweet жопа, попка and I Любовь Oprah.
Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore.
Taylor-Rae

mine : dear harry i dont really know how to tell Ты this but your a leprechaun , i think i realised it when we skinny dripped in the bath tub , at the mental hospital . And i saw Ты drive over the слон in the corner , i'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that santa doesn't exist . im returning the pictures from vegas to Ты , but i'll keep the results of the blood-sample as a memory . Ты should also know that i Любовь your sweet sweet жопа, попка . And Ты should stop picking your nose . go молоко a cow,
crona .





some person i met : dear nathan i dont really know how to tell Ты this but our socks dont match . i think i realised it when we skinny dripped in the bathtub at the mental hospital and i saw Ты sit on your my little пони collection , im sure you're open enough to understand how awful Ты are , im returning the pictures from vegas to Ты , but i'll keep Ты фото with the moostace drawn on it as a memory . Ты should also know that i Любовь your sweet sweet жопа, попка . and Ты ruined my attempts at another world war , please dont hurt me,
chloe .

what?

Dear Journee,

I don't really know how to tell Ты this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when I finally changed my underwear in a clown suit and I saw Ты put whipped cream on the слон in the corner. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand That I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. Ты should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and I have a passionate interest for mice.
Go молоко a cow,
Panda-Hero

to much complining