ABRIDGED FRIEZA:

#1:

Goku: (puts his hands up, preparing a spirit bomb)

Frieza: (not aware of what’s happening) What are Ты doing now?

Goku: … Stretching.

Frieza: In the middle of our fight?

Goku: …… Yes.

(from distance)

Piccolo: What’s going on? He’s just standing there with his hands up.

Krillin: Wait a second.

Krillin: (Goku and Frieza and hear Krillin, cause he’s screaming as loud as possible) HE’S USING THE SPIRIT BOMB!

Frieza: The Spirit whats-it-now?

Goku: (thinking) Oh no.

Piccolo: Would Ты stop screaming.

Krillin: (still screaming) THE SPIRIT BOMB IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN KILL FRIEZA!

Piccolo: (Mad at Krillin’s stupidity) Shut up!

Krillin: Too scared!

Piccolo: Dammit!

Frieza: (about Krillin) What’s that fool going about now?

Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.

Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?

Goku: Everything.

Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!

#2:

Frieza: Why aren’t my men Показ up!?… Oh, they're dead... WHY ARE THEY DEAD?!?!

#3:

Frieza: So... we've been flying for about 20 минуты now... got any family? ...Because if so, I probably killed them.. (Nail remains silent) Oh, I know! How about a good old fashioned joke? How many Namekian’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?.. Their whole race! One to screw in the light bulb, and the rest to die... And then the other one dies too. (Nail remains silent) Stop ignoring me!

#4:

Frieza: I have to admit; This is new, monkey. This is definitely new. But a monkey is still a monkey, and I've killed plenty in my day... Millions. Literally millions. (Goku remains silent) What's the matter? Run out of quips? Cat got your tongue? No еще words to flail? (Goku maintains silence) Ты think now that you're this so-called Super Saiyan that you're better than me, Lord Freeza? (Goku continues to maintain silence) WELL, YOU'RE NOT! I own you! I own your planet! I own this planet! In fact, FUCK THIS PLANET!!

#5:

Frieza: Oh please, if I'm as evil as Ты say I am then let God strike me down where I stand. (gets hit by a lightning bolt but is unaffected) HA! Nice try jackass! Далее time give it your A-game!

#6:

Frieza: (last words) If I had any single regret for the countless horrific events that have transpired in my wake... it's that I'm dying.

#7:

Krillin: We’re from earth.

Frieza: Oh, good. I'll stop by your planet on the way home; pick up some earth eggs, some earth milk, an- BLOW IT THE FUCK UP!!

#8:

Frieza: Good Lord, I was led to believe your race survived entirely on water! How is he so fat?!

#9:

Frieza: (seeing how stupid Гоку is) How do Ты function!?

#10:

Frieza: Oh, by the way.. Not dead.



ABRIDGED GOKU:

#1:

Raditz: So.. I finally found you.. Kakarrot

Goku: … What?

Raditz: That’s right, that’s your name.

Goku: … What?

Raditz: Yes, Ты were sent too earth too kill every living creature.

Goku: … What?

Raditz: You.. Hit your head as baby.

Goku: … What?

#2:

Vegeta: (in pain) This... proves... nothing…

Goku: Are Ты okay in there?

Vegeta: (sarcastically) Yeah, I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Nothing but gumdrops and ice cream in here.

Goku: (delighted) Oh, really? Can I come in too?

Vegeta: (after a short pause) ...I'm surrounded by idiots.

Goku: I thought Ты were surrounded by gumdrops and ice cream.

Vegeta: (Vegeta screams with rage as he destroys the plateau around him) I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!! I WILL NOT BE HUMILATED BY A LOW CLASS RENCH!!

Goku: Aww, looks like someone, has a ice cream head ache.

Vegeta: THAT’S IT!! EVERYONE DIES!.. SAY GOOD BYE TOO YOUR PLANET KAKARROT!!

Goku: That’s not very nice.

Vegeta: (screaming) OF COARSE NOT!! I’M FUCKING EVIL!!

#3:

Frieza: It’s like Ты just use Болталка words Ты hear, too sound smarter!

Goku: Ohh, your just being homophone.

#4:

Goku: My ribs, Ты broke m… Mmmm, ribs.

#5:

Goku: I am the hope of the omniverse! I am the light bulb in the darkness! I am the бекон, бэкон in the fridge for all the living things that cry out in hunger! I am the Alpha and the Amiga! I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am Son Gokū! and I am a Super-- (gets blasted in the face by Frieza) Saiyan.

#6:

Goku: I’m Goku.. I’m insane.. From earth.

Frieza: (confused stare).

Vegeta: (weakily) He means, Saiyan.

#7:

Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.

Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?

Goku: Everything.

Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!

#8:

Goku: Hey, Piccolo, mind if I ask Ты somethin'?

Piccolo: What is it?

Goku: You're not human either, right?

Piccolo: Yeah...?

Goku: And your dad spit Ты out as an egg, right?

Piccolo: What about it?

Goku: Are... Are Ты a Yoshi?

Piccolo: (sarcastically) Yes, Goku. I'm a green fucking dinosaur.

Goku: Can... Can I ride you?

#9:

Krillin: But how could you--

Goku: оладья, кекс, маффин Button.

Krillin: What?

Goku: Huh?

#10:

Goku: I'm done.. I'm done fighting you.. Your boring me.



ABRIDGED VEGETA:

#1:

Goku: What's wrong, Vegeta? Did Freezer do this to you?

Frieza: Oh look, he's all concerned. I'm impressed, Vegeta-- Ты managed to make a friend.

Vegeta: (weakily) Hate you. Hate Ты both

#2:

Cell: How?! HOW?! HOW DID Ты GET THIS STRONG?!

Vegeta: I trained all день yesterday.

Cell: Oh, Ты think you're being cute?!

Vegeta: Bitch, I'm adorable.

#3:

Vegeta: Is that me? Is that me stronger than me!? I’LL FUCKING KILL ME!!

#4:

Gohan: But how!? I thought Ты had to have a pure сердце to become a Super Saiyan, like my dad.

Vegeta: Oh, trust me. There's еще than one way to realize the legend…

(flashback to a badly-injured Vegeta throwing a hissy fit)

Vegeta: I wanna! I wanna be a Super Saiyan! I wanna! (begins pounding the ground like a spoiled child) IwannaIwannaIwannaIwannaIwanna—

(back to present)

Vegeta: Push-ups, sit ups and plenty of juice.

#5:

Bulma: Ты сказал(-а) Ты were wearing protection!

Vegeta: I was! I had my armour!

#6:

Vegeta: (laughs maniacally) He's gone! He's finally gone! I'm so happy right now, I might not even slaughter Ты all!

Krillin: R-Really?

Vegeta: (laughter dies down) Oh no, Ты are all thoroughly screwed.

#7:

Vegeta: It’s dark out.. In a planet with four suns.. (watch alarm goes off in his head) OH Ты MOTHER FUCCCCCCCKKER!!

#8:

Vegeta: HAH! your dad's dead!

Piccolo: So's yours!

Vegeta: HAH!

#9:

Bulma: Oh, no, the Prince is getting all huffy! What are Ты gonna do, try to blow up Earth again? Because I have Гоку on speed dial.

Vegeta: Ты must be as stupid as he is if Ты think he knows how to work a phone.

#10:

Vegeta: You! Namekian! Too strong! Explain now!

Trunks: He fused with Kami to become stronger.

Vegeta: The fuck's a Kami?

Krillin: Basically, God.

Vegeta: BUT I'M STILL HERE!

Trunks: Do Ты really believe your own hype that much?

Vegeta: I AM THE HYPE!