dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that Ты were real, that Ты all were , that he was.
There is evidence that Ты were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming или not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and Ты diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, или did i make Ты up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without Ты i dont know. But i want to find out. Do Ты think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for my sake that they can.
I know Ты wont read this, или that fact that Ты havent even read one. they jsut get sent back to me, unread, failed, jsut like i know this one will to.
But i think this is the only thing that stops me from doing what i shouldn't do. what ever that is.
Charlie would say hi, if he knew anything. I've been so quite that me andcharlie no longer talk.
And jake. Well, he reminds me of you. Your friendship, your beauty, your loveliness. And the easiness to be normal around, someone i diddnt have to try,that i will never experience again.
But jake could never replace you.
school sucks, i think only Ты and him was my only exucuse to get up and out of постель, кровати for school.
i havent spoken to my mum in ages. she calls and calls and abuses dad. but i just cant. she will be too concerned and ask Вопросы that i dont want to answer или just hear.
Well i Любовь Ты alice. i have to make ужин for charlie, in silence again..
talk to Ты in the Далее few days. funny how i say that, when i wont."

Любовь bella