Shameless recap: 'A Gallagher Pedicure' 

ended with our young, innocent (okay, not so innocent, but still young!) Carl Gallagher getting married. So where did he take Kassidi for their honeymoon? The very romantic spot known as the bedroom he shares with his two brothers. “A Gallagher Pedicure” kicks off with the newlyweds making unprotected love (Kassidi doesn’t want to waste any time having “100 little baby Carls”) under the covers, paying no attention to the very awake Ian and Liam.

Down the hall, the other Gallagher brother is comfortably sleeping — until Lip gets a 2 a.m. text from Sierra. Booty call? Far from it. Her dad has been released from prison and she’s worried that he’s going to come after her. Lip brings Sierra and her son inside, laying Lucas on the couch, while the former flames head to his room, where she begins crying. They lie together, only to quickly be joined by Lucas.

without a busy morning at the Gallagher household, which is exactly what we get when everyone wakes up — or is still up, in the case of Liam, Ian, and Fiona, who pulled an all-nighter looking over the lawsuit filed against her. Lucas soon comes down to join them, causing Liam to rightfully ask, “Who the hell are you?” Meanwhile, Frank’s still preoccupied with figuring out his retirement options. The current plan is to try to collect benefits via the stolen IDs he’s in possession of (now that’s the Frank we know and love!). The lovebirds then join the party, with Fiona laying a harmful slap on Carl for getting hitched. “You’re both idiots,” she declares. Her father, however, has a much different take. “Can’t stop love,” opines Frank. “Proud of my Carl for putting a ring on that one.” You’re never wrong when you follow the advice of the great philosopher Beyoncé.

Fiona doesn’t have time to stay and counter Frank’s argument since she has to go pick up Debbie at the ER. Debbie’s accident turned out to be even worse than predicted. It was so bad that amputation of the foot was a possibility, but at this point, she’s facing reconstructive surgery or the removal of the three damaged toes. Neither option is cheap…or painless.

Back at the house, Sierra finally shares the full details behind her mother’s murder. “I’ve never been able to get that night out of my mind,” she says. It’s a pretty brutal and tragic story. Sierra and Neil, then children, watched as their father repeatedly punched their mom, eventually killing her. Their dad threatened them to stay quiet, but they would end up testifying against him, which is why Sierra is on edge. Lip offers to go with her later to pick up some stuff at home in case pops is hanging around.

Following last week’s rousing speech, the Church of Gay Jesus continues to grow, as Ian arrives to a swarm of fans and followers, including one young kid named Blake who says his dad is trying to kidnap him. Since Ian never hears this, Blake ends up getting grabbed. Like the gay religious action hero that he is, Ian jumps into action, cutting off the van transporting the boy and lying down in front of it. This inspires the onlookers to join him in blocking the vehicle, allowing the hostage to easily hop out. Once again, Ian is looked at as the messiah reincarnated.

Just as Ian’s associates are arguing the legalities of keeping Blake from his parents, the dad shows up wanting to talk. “We will do anything to save him,” the man insists, claiming he’s not a bigot — that, instead, he’s concerned with his son using drugs and prostituting himself. This news sends Ian to chat with Blake, who says he can’t go home, revealing that his parents put him on medication because they think he’s mentally ill. Considering his personal history, that surely hits home for Ian.

Now that she’s picked up Debbie, it’s time for Fiona to try to settle things with the homeless family squatting in her apartment. She nicely knocks on the door, attempting to reason with Rodney and Trina before their non-response causes her to quickly lose it — especially when she hears her dog in there. “I will kill you with my bare f—ing hands,” Fiona barks, as she finally decides to use her key to enter, only to discover that they’ve changed the locks. Oh, so they do have enough money to pay for a locksmith? Right as things are about to get ugly, Fiona gets called up to the roof, where her insurance company is surveying the scene. Fortunately, she’s covered for up to $500,000. Unfortunately, the guy she hired to do the work has no insurance, so it all falls back on her. Back in the good news department, though, Fiona has a lawyer, and OH MY GOD, it’s Janice from

Perhaps as payback for Lip running out on her, Eddie shows up the shop with another guy, whom she probably gave a black eye to and definitely makes out with. “You and the f—ing drama,” she remarks to Lip when he mentions he’s leaving early to help Sierra. He’s actually doing more than helping, since he tells Sierra that he’ll go by himself. And just in case, he asks to look at a picture of her dad. He also wants to know where her dad is staying, which seems like unnecessary information if Lip is only going to pick up her stuff.

Kassidi and Carl are celebrating their union by having sex — and a lot of it. But she wants to know about more him than just his body. “Show me your life,” she requests, wanting the entire Carl Gallagher experience. “I need to know the life you’ve lived.” Be careful what you ask for. The tour around the South Side includes dead bodies, drive-bys, and group homes. And she’s loving it all, until Carl makes mention that he’s still planning on returning to school. After Kassidi storms off, he chases her down and eventually relents, agreeing to stay in Chicago with her. “No one is ever going to love you as hard as I do, Carl Gallagher,” she declares as they hug. “Remember that.” Speaking for all

and Carl fans, we’d like to formally request that you love him less. 

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