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Buttercup: *Doing pushups*
Grayback: Practicing for Mojo Jojo?
Blossom: I told her to do it earlier so she would get her energy back, but when he arrives, she'll be too tired.
Buttercup: I got energy to spare.
Eula: *Farts*
Buttercup: *Falls down* Eugh, what did Ты eat?
Eula: тако bell. You're girls. Why don't Ты fart?
Blossom: *Leaves with Buttercup*
Eula: Welcome to Sean's Spectacular Saturday of Stories. I'm Eula, and I'm the hostess tonight. Here's tonight schedule.

8 PM - Now

Con Mane: You'll Only Live Twice

8:30 PM - Later

Anata No Tenkei-Tekina Аниме - Bak2Bak

Con Mane has returned.

We begin our story in Beijing, which was violently taken over by the koreans.

Con: *sneaks onto dock*
korean pony55: What was that?
Con: *kills pony* еще like who was that?
korean pony21: I'll be right back I just wanna get some cider.
Con: *sneaks toward warehouse*
korean pony21: *shoots at Con*
Con: *dodges bullets*
korean pony21: All units, we have an intruder in the warehouse!
Con: *pulls out gun* Where is that manifest?
korean leader: What do Ты need the manifest for? Grenades? We made specially designed grenades to blow up an entire building. Now that Ты know this, I gotta let Ты go *kills Con Mane*

A few days later the C.I.E found Con Mane dead in the warehouse.

P: Bring him back to life!
Doctor: We can't. It's past 24 hours.
S: Well, at least he died on the JOB.
Moneybit: Yeah, *cries*
P: What happened that got Ты into this Con?

Fillies & Gentlecolts I present to Ты the 5th INSTALLMENT of Con Mane called...

You'll Only Live Twice

Starring

Doughnut Joe...........................Con Mane
Rarity........................................Rareesa
Discord.........................Ernst Staverald Discord
Pinkie Pie.......................................P
Spike...............................................S
Lyra Heartstrings..........................Miss. Moneybit
British ponies..............................M.I.6
Korean ponies..............................bad guys

Cars provided by

Chevronet
Equestrian MOTOR WORKS
Dodge
Canterlot
Horseche
& others that will be mentioned later.

The Далее день in Canterlot

Moneybit: Welcome back Mr. Mane.
Con: Thank Ты Moneybit. I better be еще careful, cause I'll only live twice.
Moneybit: I hear ya.
P: Glad to see you're still alive 0007.
Con: Oh yes. Even though I died I'm on another life.
P: You're second. Now listen, I need Ты to go to England, and help M.I.6 stop someone from creating W.M.D's.
Con: What kind are we dealing with?
P: First it was grenades, now it's rockets.
Con: How big?
P: Big enough to destroy Manehattan.
Con: Well we can't allow that. I'm on my way.
S: Con. Wait up.
Con: Why?
S: P assigned me to go with you.
Con: Alright. Let's go to england.

So Con, and S along with his crew left for England.

Con: Where's the пони were meeting?
S: She should be over there.
Rareesa: Hello.
Con: Oh hey. Muffins are Derpy's Избранное food.
Rareesa: Yes, but I don't know what they are.
Con: Now what do Ты know about the пони that's creating all those W.M.D's?
Rareesa: Nothing, except for that he's not a pony.
S: We must get going now. Where's your car?
Rareesa: It's that car over there *points at sports car*
Con: Sweet! I'm driving.

After 17 минуты of driving a sports car, Con arrived at a house.

S: Thanks for making us take the bus!
Con: My pleasure.
workers: Hello.
M.I.6 leader: Hello lads, what are Ты doing here?
Con: We're here to help Ты stop whoevers making all those W.M.D missiles.
M.I.6 leader: I also believe Ты have something for us.
S: Yes we do. Ok Ты guys, set up Little Mily.
M.I.6 leader: I'm quite curious Mr. ehh..?
Con: Mane. Con Mane.
M.I.6 leader: Oh right. I'm quite curious Mr. Mane, what is Little Mily?
Con: Oh she's a wonderful mare. Very small, quite fast, and can do anything. Just your type.
workers: *finish work*
M.I.6 leader: A toy helicopter?
S: No, it's not a toy. You'll see. Con, would Ты care to demonstrate?
Con: Sure. *climbs into helicopter*
S: Ты push this rotor, and it starts the chopper *pushes motor*
Con: *flies away*
Rareesa: Wow
Con: S! I see korean choppers heading toward me!
korean pony66: *shoot missiles*
Con: *blows up missiles*
S: *shoots pilot*
Korean pony42: We have a пони down!
Con: *shoots other pilot*

The C.I.E won, but they still had to find where the Weapons of Mass Destruction were being built.

When Con got back from flying Little Mily, M.I.6 found the building where the W.M.D's were being manufactured.

Rareesa: It's at the Космос station?
Con: Looks like we might be going to where Luna was for 1,000 years.
S: We're not going to the moon Con.
Con: Well lets just stop these ponies now!

So they left, in Rareesa's EMW & with some pegasi carrying the others.

Rareesa: Here we are.
Con: Let's do this. *grabs MP5*

Con, and M.I.6 stormed into the Космос station killing some ponies that got in there way.

S: *grabs pen*
Con: Ты gonna blow someone up?
S: Pens don't always explode *shoots tranquilizer*
korean pony72: Aaahh!
korean pony55: *shoots at Rareesa*
Con: I got this *kills korean pony55*
S: We need to get on that spaceship!
Con: Let me handle it *teleports his team onto ship*
S: Good.
M.I.6 leader: Now everypony get into a spacesuit.
korean pony21: Freeze!
korean pony33: Hold on, isn't that?
??: Con Mane. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Ernst Staverald Discord. They told me Ты were assassinated in Beijing.
Con: Yes, this is my секунда life.
Discord: You'll only live twice Mr. Mane.
Con: Yeah, only. *shoots safety valve*
korean pony21: What did he do? *shoots Con*
Con: *uses magical shield*
M.I.6 leader: Looks like we're not going into space.
S: Quick, into the escape pods!
Discord: *launches them all* Nice try, until then Goodbye Mr. Mane. *leaves*
Con: Teleportation?
S: Now!

Luckily before the spaceship exploded, Con got everyone off.

M.I.6 leader: Good work Mr. Mane.
Con: Thanks, but what about Discord?
M.I.6 leader: We'll worry about him later, but first we have another assignment for Ты to help us with.

And what might that be? Is it...

A. Killing Discord
B. Finding a моль in M.I.6
C. Preventing a mad пони from launching еще missiles
D. Buying чай for Rareesa

















If Ты guessed C preventing somepony from launching еще missiles Ты are correct.

Con: So where is he?
M.I.6 leader: At the warehouse where Ты were killed.
Con: Oh great.
M.I.6 leader: Relax, with some practice you'll get ready.

M.I.6 was going to train Con with some KARATE.

Con: What exactly do I need to do this for?
M.I.6: Many koreans are experts in karate. Whoever you're going against will most likely know karate.
Con: Well then lets do this.

So Con practiced with the other пони until..

british pony53: Ambush! It's the Koreans!
M.I.6 leader: What? Let's go Con, I'll have to teach Ты еще karate later.
korean pony98: Keep firing *kills 53rd british pony*
M.I.6 leader: We have a пони down! Send reinforcements!
Con: *kills two koreans*
korean pony40: We need еще reinforcements!
korean leader: Sorry, we cannot send anymore ponies out there.
korean pony40: Shit! Retreat!
Con: *kills еще ponies*
M.I.6 leader: Easy! They're retreating.
Con: Alright. Howsabout we practice еще karate?

The two ponies soon got back to where they were practicing karate.

M.I.6 leader: *throws kick*
Con: *grabs leg & breaks it*
M.I.6 leader: Bloody hell, Ты learn fast.
Con: Want me to fix that?
M.I.6 leader: No, I think your ready.
Con: Excellent.
M.I.6 leader: Now all Ты need to do is travel back to time after your death, and get back your first life.
Con: That's all?
M.I.6 leader: It isn't as easy as it sounds.
Con: Well if I can only live twice, I wanna keep both forever.
M.I.6 leader: What if Ты die from being too old?
Con: I get my секунда life, and I come back as a foal. Good bye sir *time travels*

So let's see how this goes

Con: *sneaks onto dock*
korean pony55: What was that?
Con: *kills pony* еще like who was that?
korean pony21: I'll be right back I just wanna get some cider.
Con: *sneaks toward warehouse*
korean pony21: *shoots at Con*
Con: *dodges bullets*
korean pony21: All units, we have an intruder in the warehouse!
Con: *pulls out gun* Where is that manifest?
korean leader: What do Ты need the manifest for? Grenades? We made specially designed grenades to blow up an entire building. Now that Ты know this, I gotta let Ты go. *shoots gun*
Con: Ты missed loser. It's not just grenades your making.
korean leader: Correct. We're also making missiles. Not only that, but we're launching the ones that belong to Germany & Mexico, making it look like they waged war against each other.
Con: Not if I can help it. *shoots korean leader*
korean leader: I'm hit, need backup now!

5 ponies then arrived at the scene.

Con: *kills all 5*
korean leader: *hits Con*
Con: *runs into warehouse*
korean leader: *follows*
Con: (Where are the missiles being launched)
korean leader: *grabs grenade*
Con: *shoots grenade*
korean leader: *blows up*
korean pony82: Stop! Hooves up.
Con: *hits pony* where are the missiles being launched?
korean pony82: *shoots Con's hoof*
Con: *pushes пони over ledge*
korean pony82: I'm still alive!
Con: Then tell me where the missiles are being launched!
korean pony82: On a boat. It should be in the docks.
Con: Thanks.

0007 then went toward the лодка that would be launching the missiles.

korean pony96: We have an intruder!
Discord: Let him on, let him on.
Con: *pushes пони off boat*
Discord: Now kill him.
korean pony96: *grabs knife* Banzai!!
Con: *shoots pony* Wrong part of asia.
Discord: Welcome Mr. Mane.
Con: Hello Discord. So you're trying to get Germany into war with Mexico.
Discord: Yes, precisely. Not only that, but I'll be launchcing my own.
Con: What for?
Discord: To destroy all of China so that Korea can have it.
Con: Not on my watch *hits Discord with clock* или on your clock.
Discord: It's not mine *grabs gun*
Con: *shoots it* Don't launch the missiles & I'll let Ты live.
Discord: I have to. *goes for button*
Con: *kills Discord* Finally! *time travels back to present*

None of the missiles were launched, but Con may deal with the same enemy in his Далее adventure, On Celestia's Secret Service

The End
added by Seanthehedgehog
8 минуты of disco music. Bad жопа, попка disco music.
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A disco classic from the Royal Band
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Long ago, the Everlasting Dragon’s held power over Lordran and watched over all. They controlled the First Flame, which kept the land in prosperity. One day, four beings found the Lord Souls within the First Flame and took the power for their own. These four beings were known as Nito, the First of the Dead, the Witch of Izalith, the Furtive Pigmy Seath the Scaleless, and Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight. They used the power to defeat every last one of the Everlasting Драконы and took the power of the First Flame for their own, beginning the Age of Fire. However, the First Flame was never meant to last...
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the godfather
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posted by Canada24
Randell was brought towards the farmhouse.

Almost instantly Shane took a disliking towards him. And for no reason at all, Shane began throwing empty пиво cans at Randell.

"You can't treat me like this! I'm a human being with thoughts and emotions!" Randell cried angrily.

Everyone responded to this by clapping as if Randell was a cat first learning to use the piano.

Randell rolled his eyes in annoyance.

Rick insisted that Randell's leg will need surgery. Randell admitted his leg is actually fine now, but Rick shot his revolver directly into Randell's kneecap, same leg was impaired on the fence.

"See.. It's getting worse for him" Rick implied.

Herschel agreed to treat his leg.

Randell thanked them, but Shane punched him in the stomach for literary no reason at all, and Shane walked away after doing so.

Well.. That's all I got. So it probably sucked. Had a long day