Serena: So, when's the party?
Blair: Saturday... and you're kinda not invited. Since, until 12 hours ago, we all thought Ты were at boarding school. And Jenny used up all the invites.
Blair: We should get going, unless Ты want us to wait for you. Looks like Ты got a lot of yogurt left.
Blair: Great. So, my dad left her for another man. She Остаться в живых 15 pounds, got an eye lift. It's been good for her.
Serena: I Любовь you, B.
Blair: I Любовь you, too, S.
Blair: She better not Показать her face again.
Chuck: I'm actually hoping she will.
2. The Wild поздний завтрак, бранч
Blair: I wonder if Nate remembered brunch. It would be so wrong to Показать up without my boyfriend, who I love. And who loves me.
Serena: I'm really trying to make an effort here. I thought everything was good between us.
Blair: It was. Before I found out Ты had sex with my boyfriend.
Blair: Ты know, I always knew Ты were a whore. But I never knew Ты were a liar.
Blair: If Ты wanna be part of this world, Jenny, people will talk. Eventually. Ты gotta decide if all this is worth it.
Blair: What are Ты doing right now? How about me?
Blair: It wasn't a quickie. Sex is actually a big deal to some of us.
3. Poison Ivy
Blair: Funny, Brown doesn't offer a degree in slut.
Blair: My father left my mother for a 31-year-old model. A male model.
4. Bad News Blair
Blair: Why am I mad? Ты mean, why aren't I furious?! I can't believe for one секунда I thought that it would be different this time.
Blair: What about this morning then? When Ты glanced at the call sheet, did Ты see my name on it? When I wasn't in hair and make-up, didn't that seem strange? When the dressing room only had your name on it, what, did Ты think they just forgot?
Blair: Because Ты take everything from me! Nate, my mom!
Serena: Blair!
Blair: Ты can't even help it. It's who Ты are. I just thought that maybe this time it would be different. I should have known I'd be wrong
Blair: Who dare interrupt the фургон, ван Der Woodsen as she teaches?!
Blair: Sorry, the number Ты dialed is no longer is service.
Serena: Stop it, who is it?
Blair: I'm doing Ты a favor.
Dan: Look I can hear you. Can I just please talk to Serena?
Blair: Apparently Ты can, cabbage patch
Blair: Maybe we should crash the shoot, anyway. See who they replaced me with. Make fun of that skinny b!tch.
Blair: Ты haven't done this since I was little.
Eleanor: Ты haven't been in постель, кровати by ten since Ты were little
5. Dare Devil
Blair: I'm not a stop along the way. I'm a destination. And if Ты refuse to come, I'm gonna need to find a replacement... girls, the waiting list?
Blair: That's nice, Little Humphrey. But, um, that's not how we play
Blair: Okay, I have a problem. I have a big problem! It starts with a capital RX.
Nurse: What drugs have Ты been taking?
Blair: Caffiene, Nicotine, Cadimine, Disprine, LSD, Driazapam, Flurazepam. All the pams really, I don't discriminate.
Blair: Martini.
Jenny: Oh, no thanks, I don't like Vodka.
Blair: Well thats great, because this is gin, as it should be
6. The Handmaiden's Tale
Blair: After everything that's happened - or, hasn't happened - I wanna make it special.
Blair: All I wanted was for us to start over. And Ты didn't even try.
Blair: Is that a bong, mother? I didn't take Ты for a stoner.
7. Victor Victrola
Blair: I don't want to talk about it. I just want to escape. That's what this place is for, right?
Blair: Yeah, let's talk about that masked ball. Let's talk about how I was waiting for Ты to find me so that we can finally be together, Ты were confessing your feelings and Поцелуи Serena. I thought I was doing everything right.
Blair: Do Ты Любовь me?... Ты should deal with your father. He needs you. Ты know what? I don't.
Blair: Game recognizes game, Little J. But Ты have to Показать еще respect. This is the last time I'll help you. Далее time Ты пересекать, крест me, I won't be as forgiving.
Blair: So, I heard on Gossip Girl that Ты were having sex with Dan out here...in streaming video.
Serena: Oh, God. Kati and Is filmed us?
Blair: Well, it's not very high school musical scandalous. And no, they haven't streamed it...yet. But, I heard it was aggressive.
Blair: Well, it does have franchise potential. Chuck Bass, I do believe that all your years of underage boozing and womanizing have finally paid off. Truly, I am proud.
8. Seventeen Candles
Blair: Thank you, Father. That was very good advice.... Ты don't grant birthday wishes, do you?
Priest: I'm a priest, not a genie.
Blair: Well, the Далее time Ты talk to Him, could Ты ask Him to send my boyfriend back to me?
Blair: After being broken up with my boyfriend for exactly 20 minutes, I succumbed to inebriation, performed at a speakeasy, and surrendered my virtue to a self-absorbed ass. The only good news is that he's a total pig who'll act like it never happened, thank God.
Blair: Losing my virginity to Chuck Bass? None of my Друзья will ever understand. I'm ready for my punishment. Whatever Ты and God think is fair. Flogging, fasting, или putting that thing with the teeth around my thigh like Silas.
Blair: Go away, Chuck! I've been дана orders, practically from God himself, to avoid you.
Blair: No one knows that Nate and I broke up, and it's going to stay that way until I can fix this. And I don't think you're best friend would still be Ты best friend is he knew...
Blair: Well, erase the tape! Because as far as I'm concerned, it never happened.
Blair: You're officially uninvited.
Blair: Exactly my point. But even if she wasn't, when Ты get a boyfriend, Ты become the best friend and the best friend becomes the секунда best friend. That's just how it has to be, if it's ever going to work.
Blair: These Бабочки have got to be murdered.
9. Blair Waldorf Must Pie!
Blair: I don't know what I was thinking. I mean, sleeping with him once, maybe I could understand. But twice?
Blair: Oh, so Nate gets a free pass and I'm the slut?
Serena: Tell me Ты didn't sleep with Chuck for revenge.
Blair: Well, it wasn't because I liked his natural musk. And, besides, nothing hurts еще than sleeping with the best friend. Right, S?
Blair: Your mom is freaking out, so my is freaking out.
Blair: If Ты think about it, it makes total sense that your mom was a groupie. I mean, only a woman that had completely satisfied her sexual appetite in her youth would ever marry your stepdads.
10. Hi, Society
Blair: Ты almost made a fool of me in front of the New York Times. Which proves my very point; Ты can't be trusted. Nate is a gentleman; he would never cause a scene.
Blair: Well, I can't be on you, remember? Ты don't want Nate to find out and I don't want anyone to. Ты have to learn how to behave yourself first.
Blair: Nate, after what Ты pulled on my birthday, the only thing we should be doing together is moving on.
11. Roman Holiday
Blair: I think Ты like Dan a little too much. But I should let Ты know, someone's watching. Merry Christmas!
Blair: Well, Roman, Ты are in for a treat because, the Waldorf Рождество is like no other.
Blair: There's no room in your life for me anymore.
Blair: I don't know. A single entrain a mid-price restaurant? Three-quarters of a DVD box set? Maybe a pair of Wilfrid stockings?
Blair: I don't know, why don't Ты buy him a Золото money for $49.99. He won't know the difference.
Blair: Chuck! Ты are not answering my calls. To torture me, I am sure. But, please! For the Любовь of God, do not tell anybody about us. Okay? Please? Please.
Blair: Well, I'm sorry, mother. It's just not the same. I don't understand how that French лиса, фокс украл, палантин my father and your husband, and always seems to come off like an innocent lamb.
Blair: Roman doesn't even know how to ice skate. Can't Ты escort him out of the park on the way to your meeting? Maybe drop him off a nail salon...
Blair: Why don't Ты just buy a new outfit for Cedric and call it a day?
12. School Lies
Blair: Ты have no idea who you're dealing with.
Blair: I'll just tell him your lying. And Ты do Ты think he'll believe? Ты who bangs anything in his field of vision. или me, his pure and honest girlfriend of many years.
Blair: Enough with the blackmail, aren't Ты bored already? I can't avoid Nate forever.
Blair: Isn't there someone else Ты can torture?
Blair: I'm innocent. Well, except for a crime of passion. I did something stupid with someone and even worse than doing that stupid thing I did the same stupid thing with someone else and pretended I'd never done that stupid thing before. Ты look confused... should I walk Ты through it?
Blair: Ты are so naive. Michael Moore over there is obviously just using this film to get close to Dan.
13. A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate
Blair: I'm not pregnant. I command myself to not be pregnant.
Blair: I'm very stressed. And with Ты and Serena down my throat I can hardly see straight, never mind keep Еда down.
Blair: Maybe I am a total bitch. Ever think about that?
Blair: I'm not pregnant. So goodbye mistake, so far in my past I can hardly remember it.
Blair: If Ты go with them, I'll ruin you.
14. The Blair сука Project
Blair: Lady Godiva, my only friend.
Blair: But your hair looks disgusting. Did Ты even душ today?
Blair: рис, райс Krispie treats?
Blair: Brooklyn... I think that's in New York.
15. Desperately Seeking Serena
Blair: And have Ты seen Nelly Yuki's extracurriculars? I should kick her well-rounded ass.
Serena: Why do Ты keep saying her name?
Blair: Because it's Nelly Yuki!
Blair: Ew gross! Incoming, Chuck.
16. All About My Brother
Blair: All that matters to someone like Jenny right now are the 4 Gs, Guys, Girlfriends and Gossip Girl.
Blair: Right know Gossip Girl's credibility is like Tinsley Mortimer's after a few martinis.
Blair: It's your brotherly duty to keep her from becoming the Далее Katie Holmes.
Blair: What are Ты talking about? You're starting to scare me. Hey, hey, hey. We're sisters. You're my family. What is you, is me. There's nothing Ты could ever say to make me let go. I Любовь you. What is it?
Blair: My, my. If it isn't Little J, risen from the ashes?
Blair: I tried to warn you. There's a price to pay. I always knew a girl like Ты couldn't afford it.
17. Woman On the Verge
Blair: We've seen Ты with vomit in your hair, making out with investment bankers in the men's room at PJ Clark's. Ты don't have to hide anything from us.
Blair: Yeah, I had sex with him in the back of a limo.
Blair: Ты can tell us anything. We don't judge. We're the non-judging Breakfast club. We're your best friends. Anything Ты do is something we did too.
Blair: Uh, I'm a big Фан of линкольн Hawk?
18. Much I Do About Nothing
Blair: How? It's not like Ты every do anything athletic.
Chuck: Well, that's not entirely true, now is it?
Blair: Fine, nothing that involves removing your scarf.
Blair: Break a leg.
Chuck: I think I just did.
Blair: Ugh! They say when Ты hate something, Ты should slam the door in its face.
Blair: Haven't Ты heard? I'm the crazy сука around here.
Blair: Don't worry, I can be a сука enough for both of us.
Blair: Oh, you're not alone Georgina. I'm here now. And I brought some people who really really want to see you. I think Ты remember your parents.
Blair: Chuck бас, бас-гитара is a romantic, who knew?
Chuck: Ты don't belong to Nate. Never have, never will.
Blair: Ты never belong to anyone.
Blair: No one ever enjoys their first time.
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Sorry, that it's so long, but Blair has a lot of awsome lines :]
