Meanwhile, Dash Lucia continued staying with the Griffins within a week and a half now, over that time she spent some time with Peter and the guys at the Drunken Clam, but Dash got to the point that even Peter Griffin сказал(-а) she may have a drinking problem. And fortunately Quagmire couldn't do anything to take advantage of her drunken state while officer Joe Swanson was still with them.
Dash was coming Главная to the Griffin house when she finally met Brian in the kitchen, who was gone most of her time there.
“Hello beautiful.. Ты got me, yes I am 'the' Brian Griffin. The writer, perhaps Ты have heard of me?” Brian сказал(-а) smugly.
“No.” Dash сказал(-а) dryly, not even ‘trying’ to sound interested.
“Faster Than The Speed Of Love”, yep that’s my book.” Brian сказал(-а) smugly.
''It sold zero copies." Stewie's voice сказал(-а) from just off-view.
"Shut up he's lying, it sold enough. Impressive right? I mean I'm practically a celebrity." Brian сказал(-а) in his overly smug tone. But Dash doesn't even respond, and her face shows nothing but blank apathy and complete disinterest, just waiting for him to finish before saying "great, so can Ты Переместить now? You're blocking the TV room."
Brian sighs and steps aside, Dash wordlessly goes to the диван, мягкий уголок and flips around for a cop show.
"Ha, that was a big old nothing." Stewie laughed, still sitting at the ужин таблица despite all the plates being away.
"Hey Chris, Brian got rejected by the drunk!" Stewie yelled, Chris is heard laughing loudly from another room. "What an idiot!" Chris shouts.
"She didn't reject me, I just shouldn't have put her on the spot like that, I mean it's a big deal meeting 'the' Brian Griffin. I should have eased her into it."
"No, Ты were rejected, even a drunk girl had higher standards than dating you." Stewie replied.
"Hey watch it, that is a high class woman." Brian said, despite having only known her for less than a minute.
"High class, she drives a 90's Volkswagen and listens to Dead Kennedys all day." Stewie replied.
"Better than those nursery rhymes Ты listen to." Brian muttered.
"Well Ты were still rejected."
-------------------------------------------------------
A few days later:
Stewie comes down to Dash cooking breakfast but pouring Jack Danials onto the eggs she was cooking. Stewie saying she's already hungover from the night before, Dash saying "takes the edge off".
Not wanting her to end up like Peter and Lois, Stewie goes over to her and jumps up, slapping her. He doesn't seem to know that it's bad hitting girls.. или simply just doesn't care about that.
"Ow, that wasn't nice..." Dash started but Stewie hit her again, and then took the bottle. "I ain't having Ты ending up like the rest of these idiots, Ты wanna wake up at Quagmires?!"
"Who?" Dash asked, only to be slapped again.
“You have a drinking problem!” Stewie cried angrily, obviously going with the 'tough love' approach.
“N -No I don't.” Dash said, еще timid than usual.
"You're pouring whiskey into eggs!" Stewie yelled.'
"I -It's seasoned to taste." Dash сказал(-а) timidly, only to be slapped again.
"Couldn't Ты tell something was up when the fat man himself сказал(-а) Ты might have a problem?! The man lives at the bar еще than he does at home" Stewie cried out.
"I -I'm not not..."
"Your a fucking drunk!" Stewie yelled angrily. Dash breaks into tears and falls to her knees. Finally accepting after all these years.
"It's true! It's all true!" she sobbed. Stewie finally calms down and changes tactics, patting the sobbing girl comfortingly.
"There Ты go, acceptance is step one."
"He's right." Brian said, having overheard and now coming into the room. "It's all part of taking responsibility, I do it all the time."
Stewie: Brian abandoned his own son, by the way.
"I'm just saying, Stewie's right, acceptance is step one." Brian continued, completely avoiding Stewie's comment.
"Alright, fine, I'll go to Alcoholics anonymous." Dash groaned, making them both clap in approval.
-----------------------------------------------------------
SEVERAL DAYS LATER/AA MEETING:
It turns out that thanks to Peter’s and Brian’s stupid idea about it, everyone who’s supposed to be going clean, including Dash, is instead drinking heavily at the AA meeting.
Peter: (drunk) So I clicked on it, and the -the girl's got a bigger wang than I do.
Dash (drunk) No way!
Peter (drunk): Right!? So I.. So I just put my thumb over it, and then... And that got me through the rest of... of the... of the session.
Dash (drunk): ... I think I was spiked at prom.
Peter (drunk): Oh that's just... That... Your life sucks.
Dash: Yeah.. :(
Bruce: Oh no’s, I see a policeman!
Peter: Quick, everyone!
---------------------------------------------------------
Joe: All right, what the hell's going on here? We got a noise complaint.
Brian: Joe, shh. Peter's about to start.
Peter (as pastor) We are gathered here again tonight, fellow AA members, to talk about the greatest temptation the Devil ever created: Alcohol.
(humming tune)
Peter♫♪♪: (slow) Mr. Booze... Mr. Booze... Mr. B-double-O-Z-E...
Crowd♫♪♪: (slow) That sure spells booze...
Peter♫♪♪: (speeds up as does the music) Ты will wind up wearing tattered shoes, if Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!...
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze...
Peter♫♪♪: If you've been so stiff they thought Ты died, you'll feel better once you've testified.
Crowd♫♪♪: Testify!
Brian♫♪♪: Oh, yeah!
Peter♫♪♪: Testify!
Bruce: I want to testify!
Peter: Well then, cleanse yourself, my son. Cleanse yourself.
Bruce: Ones time I took a liberry book out, and I fells asleep Чтение it, and I left it under the bed. I forgot about it for three and a half years. I was going to take it back on Amnesty Day, but on Amnesty Day, I had a sip of rosé wine, and I never made it out of the house.
Peter♫♪♪: Who's to blame? What's his name? We know his name. His name is-
Everyone♫♪♪: Mr. Booze. Mr. Booze, Mr. B-double-O-Z-E, don't ever choose. Any game Ты play with him, Ты will lose, so don't mess with Mr. Booze..
Peter♫♪♪: If your head feels like it's two miles wide...
The Others♫♪♪: Two miles wide...
Peter♫♪♪: You'll feel better once you've testified.
Everyone♫♪♪: Testify! Oh, yes! Testify!
Dash: I want to testify. I want to testify.
Peter: Then cleanse yourself dear sister.
Dash: In high school I was dared by a boyfriend to steal booze from a store and we got hammered on the beach. He ran off and left me to get arrested, I was bailed out but swore to never drink again.. And yet each morning I wake up somewhere new.. Last time was at Peter's house.
Peter♫♪♪: Who's to blame? What's his name!? (everyone joins in) His name is Mr. Booze, Mr. Booze... Mr. B-double-O-Z-E, Ты must refuse! You'll make the obituary if Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: If you've been so stiff they thought Ты died, you'll feel better once you've testified. Testify, testify!
Tom Tucker (runs in with Olle Williams): This man wants to testify.
Peter: Very well, my brother. Let us lead him on the path of righteousness.
Tom: This poor gentleman used to speak in long, eloquent sentences, but after years of drinking, he can only speak in short, choppy utterances. Why, at one time, if Ты asked him who his Избранное musicians were, he'd say Leonard Bernstein, Johann Sebastian Bach and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. But thanks to that old devil hooch, it's all changed. Who's your favourite musician, Ollie?
Ollie: CHER!!
Tom: He doesn't even like Cher
.
Brian♫♪♪: Now alcohol makes a big man small, and can lead to a life of crime.
Crowd♫♪♪: Yeah!
Bruce♫♪♪: Demon ром makes a gent a bum, and Ты cash in before your time.
Crowd♫♪♪: Yeah!
Peter♫♪♪: (fast) Basket case, flat on your face, and there's only one guy to blame!
Everyone♫♪♪: Mr. Booze! Mr. Booze! Mr. B-Double O-Z-E Don't ever choose! Ты will wind up wearing tattered shoes, If Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr Booze!
Brian♫♪♪: (slow/deep) Don't mess with B-Double O-Z-E. Cause that spells booze. And your gonna lose with Mr. Booooze
Audience♫♪♪: (slow) Ohhh, yeaaaah.
Brian♫♪♪: Don't mess around with Mr. Booooze.
Peter♫♪♪: (normal speed) Oh mister Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Misteeeeer, booooooze. Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Everyone: YEAH!!
“Wow guys, I’m glad you're taking your AA so seriously, and sure the court would be happy two.” Joe сказал(-а) happily, poor dude having no idea.
“Now if Ты can just keep it down, so I don’t get any еще complaints.”
“Sure Joe.” Peter said, still in costume. Joe leaves, and once he does everyone cheers, and they continue partying.
Dash was coming Главная to the Griffin house when she finally met Brian in the kitchen, who was gone most of her time there.
“Hello beautiful.. Ты got me, yes I am 'the' Brian Griffin. The writer, perhaps Ты have heard of me?” Brian сказал(-а) smugly.
“No.” Dash сказал(-а) dryly, not even ‘trying’ to sound interested.
“Faster Than The Speed Of Love”, yep that’s my book.” Brian сказал(-а) smugly.
''It sold zero copies." Stewie's voice сказал(-а) from just off-view.
"Shut up he's lying, it sold enough. Impressive right? I mean I'm practically a celebrity." Brian сказал(-а) in his overly smug tone. But Dash doesn't even respond, and her face shows nothing but blank apathy and complete disinterest, just waiting for him to finish before saying "great, so can Ты Переместить now? You're blocking the TV room."
Brian sighs and steps aside, Dash wordlessly goes to the диван, мягкий уголок and flips around for a cop show.
"Ha, that was a big old nothing." Stewie laughed, still sitting at the ужин таблица despite all the plates being away.
"Hey Chris, Brian got rejected by the drunk!" Stewie yelled, Chris is heard laughing loudly from another room. "What an idiot!" Chris shouts.
"She didn't reject me, I just shouldn't have put her on the spot like that, I mean it's a big deal meeting 'the' Brian Griffin. I should have eased her into it."
"No, Ты were rejected, even a drunk girl had higher standards than dating you." Stewie replied.
"Hey watch it, that is a high class woman." Brian said, despite having only known her for less than a minute.
"High class, she drives a 90's Volkswagen and listens to Dead Kennedys all day." Stewie replied.
"Better than those nursery rhymes Ты listen to." Brian muttered.
"Well Ты were still rejected."
-------------------------------------------------------
A few days later:
Stewie comes down to Dash cooking breakfast but pouring Jack Danials onto the eggs she was cooking. Stewie saying she's already hungover from the night before, Dash saying "takes the edge off".
Not wanting her to end up like Peter and Lois, Stewie goes over to her and jumps up, slapping her. He doesn't seem to know that it's bad hitting girls.. или simply just doesn't care about that.
"Ow, that wasn't nice..." Dash started but Stewie hit her again, and then took the bottle. "I ain't having Ты ending up like the rest of these idiots, Ты wanna wake up at Quagmires?!"
"Who?" Dash asked, only to be slapped again.
“You have a drinking problem!” Stewie cried angrily, obviously going with the 'tough love' approach.
“N -No I don't.” Dash said, еще timid than usual.
"You're pouring whiskey into eggs!" Stewie yelled.'
"I -It's seasoned to taste." Dash сказал(-а) timidly, only to be slapped again.
"Couldn't Ты tell something was up when the fat man himself сказал(-а) Ты might have a problem?! The man lives at the bar еще than he does at home" Stewie cried out.
"I -I'm not not..."
"Your a fucking drunk!" Stewie yelled angrily. Dash breaks into tears and falls to her knees. Finally accepting after all these years.
"It's true! It's all true!" she sobbed. Stewie finally calms down and changes tactics, patting the sobbing girl comfortingly.
"There Ты go, acceptance is step one."
"He's right." Brian said, having overheard and now coming into the room. "It's all part of taking responsibility, I do it all the time."
Stewie: Brian abandoned his own son, by the way.
"I'm just saying, Stewie's right, acceptance is step one." Brian continued, completely avoiding Stewie's comment.
"Alright, fine, I'll go to Alcoholics anonymous." Dash groaned, making them both clap in approval.
-----------------------------------------------------------
SEVERAL DAYS LATER/AA MEETING:
It turns out that thanks to Peter’s and Brian’s stupid idea about it, everyone who’s supposed to be going clean, including Dash, is instead drinking heavily at the AA meeting.
Peter: (drunk) So I clicked on it, and the -the girl's got a bigger wang than I do.
Dash (drunk) No way!
Peter (drunk): Right!? So I.. So I just put my thumb over it, and then... And that got me through the rest of... of the... of the session.
Dash (drunk): ... I think I was spiked at prom.
Peter (drunk): Oh that's just... That... Your life sucks.
Dash: Yeah.. :(
Bruce: Oh no’s, I see a policeman!
Peter: Quick, everyone!
---------------------------------------------------------
Joe: All right, what the hell's going on here? We got a noise complaint.
Brian: Joe, shh. Peter's about to start.
Peter (as pastor) We are gathered here again tonight, fellow AA members, to talk about the greatest temptation the Devil ever created: Alcohol.
(humming tune)
Peter♫♪♪: (slow) Mr. Booze... Mr. Booze... Mr. B-double-O-Z-E...
Crowd♫♪♪: (slow) That sure spells booze...
Peter♫♪♪: (speeds up as does the music) Ты will wind up wearing tattered shoes, if Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!...
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze...
Peter♫♪♪: If you've been so stiff they thought Ты died, you'll feel better once you've testified.
Crowd♫♪♪: Testify!
Brian♫♪♪: Oh, yeah!
Peter♫♪♪: Testify!
Bruce: I want to testify!
Peter: Well then, cleanse yourself, my son. Cleanse yourself.
Bruce: Ones time I took a liberry book out, and I fells asleep Чтение it, and I left it under the bed. I forgot about it for three and a half years. I was going to take it back on Amnesty Day, but on Amnesty Day, I had a sip of rosé wine, and I never made it out of the house.
Peter♫♪♪: Who's to blame? What's his name? We know his name. His name is-
Everyone♫♪♪: Mr. Booze. Mr. Booze, Mr. B-double-O-Z-E, don't ever choose. Any game Ты play with him, Ты will lose, so don't mess with Mr. Booze..
Peter♫♪♪: If your head feels like it's two miles wide...
The Others♫♪♪: Two miles wide...
Peter♫♪♪: You'll feel better once you've testified.
Everyone♫♪♪: Testify! Oh, yes! Testify!
Dash: I want to testify. I want to testify.
Peter: Then cleanse yourself dear sister.
Dash: In high school I was dared by a boyfriend to steal booze from a store and we got hammered on the beach. He ran off and left me to get arrested, I was bailed out but swore to never drink again.. And yet each morning I wake up somewhere new.. Last time was at Peter's house.
Peter♫♪♪: Who's to blame? What's his name!? (everyone joins in) His name is Mr. Booze, Mr. Booze... Mr. B-double-O-Z-E, Ты must refuse! You'll make the obituary if Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: If you've been so stiff they thought Ты died, you'll feel better once you've testified. Testify, testify!
Tom Tucker (runs in with Olle Williams): This man wants to testify.
Peter: Very well, my brother. Let us lead him on the path of righteousness.
Tom: This poor gentleman used to speak in long, eloquent sentences, but after years of drinking, he can only speak in short, choppy utterances. Why, at one time, if Ты asked him who his Избранное musicians were, he'd say Leonard Bernstein, Johann Sebastian Bach and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. But thanks to that old devil hooch, it's all changed. Who's your favourite musician, Ollie?
Ollie: CHER!!
Tom: He doesn't even like Cher
.
Brian♫♪♪: Now alcohol makes a big man small, and can lead to a life of crime.
Crowd♫♪♪: Yeah!
Bruce♫♪♪: Demon ром makes a gent a bum, and Ты cash in before your time.
Crowd♫♪♪: Yeah!
Peter♫♪♪: (fast) Basket case, flat on your face, and there's only one guy to blame!
Everyone♫♪♪: Mr. Booze! Mr. Booze! Mr. B-Double O-Z-E Don't ever choose! Ты will wind up wearing tattered shoes, If Ты mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze!
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr Booze!
Brian♫♪♪: (slow/deep) Don't mess with B-Double O-Z-E. Cause that spells booze. And your gonna lose with Mr. Booooze
Audience♫♪♪: (slow) Ohhh, yeaaaah.
Brian♫♪♪: Don't mess around with Mr. Booooze.
Peter♫♪♪: (normal speed) Oh mister Booze.
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze.
Peter♫♪♪: Oh Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Mr. Booze
Audience♫♪♪: Don't mess with Misteeeeer, booooooze. Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Everyone: YEAH!!
“Wow guys, I’m glad you're taking your AA so seriously, and sure the court would be happy two.” Joe сказал(-а) happily, poor dude having no idea.
“Now if Ты can just keep it down, so I don’t get any еще complaints.”
“Sure Joe.” Peter said, still in costume. Joe leaves, and once he does everyone cheers, and they continue partying.
Warning: The owner of the copyright in this Фан fiction has authorized it's use for members of this club to read, and enjoy, over, and over again without charge of any kind. Any other use of this Фан fiction including any copying, reproduction или performance of any of the material..... Ah, who am I kidding? I know you're not going to steal any of the content in this Фан fiction.
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St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.
A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy Показать that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.
Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
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Tom: Thank Ты everypony.
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