1.Grasp cat firmly in your arms. колыбель its head on your elbow, just as
if Ты were giving baby a bottle. Coo confidently, "Thats a nice kitty."
Drop pill into its mouth.
2. Retrieve cat from вверх of lamp and pill from under sofa.
3. Follow same procedure as in 1, but hold cat's front paws down with left
hand and back paws down with elbow of right arm. Poke pill into its mouth
with right forefinger.
4. Retrieve cat from under bed. Get new pill from bottle. (Resist impulse
to get new cat.)
5. Again proceed as in 1, except when Ты have cat firmly cradled in
bottle-feeding position, sit down on edge of chair, fold your torso over
cat, bring your right hand over your left elbow, open cat's mouth by
lifting the upper jaw and pop the pill in - quickly. Since your head is
down by your knees, Ты won't be able to see what you're doing. That's
just as well.
6. Leave cat hanging on drapes. Leave pill in your hair.
7. If you're a woman, have a good cry. If you're a man, have a good cry.
8. Now pull yourself together. Who's the boss here anyway? Retrieve cat
and pill. Assuming position 1, say sternly, "Who's the boss here, anyway?"
Open cat's mouth, take pill and...Oooops!
9. This isn't working, is it? Collapse and think. Aha! Those flashing
claws are causing the chaos.
10. Crawl to linen closet. Drag back large пляж, пляжный towel. Spread towel on
floor.
11. Retrieve cat from кухня counter and pill from potted plant.
12. Spread cat on towel near one end with its head over long edge.
13. Flatten cat's front and back legs over its stomach. (Resist impulse to
flatten cat.)
14. Roll cat in towel. Work fast; time and tabbies wait for no man - или
woman.
15. Resume position 1. Rotate your left hand to cat's head. Press its
mouth at the jaw hinges like opening the petals of a snapdragon.
16. Drop pill into cat's mouth and poke gently. Voila! It's done.
17. Vacuum up loose мех (cat's). Apply bandages to wounds (yours).
18. Take two aspirins and lie down.
if Ты were giving baby a bottle. Coo confidently, "Thats a nice kitty."
Drop pill into its mouth.
2. Retrieve cat from вверх of lamp and pill from under sofa.
3. Follow same procedure as in 1, but hold cat's front paws down with left
hand and back paws down with elbow of right arm. Poke pill into its mouth
with right forefinger.
4. Retrieve cat from under bed. Get new pill from bottle. (Resist impulse
to get new cat.)
5. Again proceed as in 1, except when Ты have cat firmly cradled in
bottle-feeding position, sit down on edge of chair, fold your torso over
cat, bring your right hand over your left elbow, open cat's mouth by
lifting the upper jaw and pop the pill in - quickly. Since your head is
down by your knees, Ты won't be able to see what you're doing. That's
just as well.
6. Leave cat hanging on drapes. Leave pill in your hair.
7. If you're a woman, have a good cry. If you're a man, have a good cry.
8. Now pull yourself together. Who's the boss here anyway? Retrieve cat
and pill. Assuming position 1, say sternly, "Who's the boss here, anyway?"
Open cat's mouth, take pill and...Oooops!
9. This isn't working, is it? Collapse and think. Aha! Those flashing
claws are causing the chaos.
10. Crawl to linen closet. Drag back large пляж, пляжный towel. Spread towel on
floor.
11. Retrieve cat from кухня counter and pill from potted plant.
12. Spread cat on towel near one end with its head over long edge.
13. Flatten cat's front and back legs over its stomach. (Resist impulse to
flatten cat.)
14. Roll cat in towel. Work fast; time and tabbies wait for no man - или
woman.
15. Resume position 1. Rotate your left hand to cat's head. Press its
mouth at the jaw hinges like opening the petals of a snapdragon.
16. Drop pill into cat's mouth and poke gently. Voila! It's done.
17. Vacuum up loose мех (cat's). Apply bandages to wounds (yours).
18. Take two aspirins and lie down.