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Skipper: What are Ты talking about?! We helped you!
George: Ты have no proof.
Gravin: Actually, if Ты haven't noticed, this is a Reality TV Show. Cameras are hidden everywhere.
*a video shows Team PoM helping George*
Gravin: Okay now i'm just confused.
George: Whoa.... that's um.... odd.....?
Skipper: Wait a minute..... someone paid Ты didn't they?
George: H-How'd Ты know?
Private: Wow Skipper, Ты truley are amazing at those type of things.
Kowalski: Alright listen George, who paid Ты to try and frame us?
George: If I say will I get in trouble?
Rico: Uh... nope?
George: It was the dog!
Skipper: I knew it!!
Gravin: He's right. It shows in this video. What do Ты have to say for yourself now, Team TP?
Dudley: Uh.... bye?
*Kitty smacks him*
Gravin: Instead of Team PoM, Team TP will be discualified instead.
Kitty: Ahh, Dudley! I told Ты that plan was off!
*Team TP gets on the bus and the bus leaves*
Po: So I guess that just leaves Ты guys and us.
Gravin: That's right! The final competition is tomorrow! Rest up!

That night.....

Private(whispering): Huh? Skipper! Where are Ты going?
Skipper: Shhh! Come!
*They both step outside*
Private: What is it Skipper?
Skipper: Do Ты think it's weird how in every competition we have to get some type of food? Like the blue apple, или the bananas from Verytallmountain, and the golden coconuts?
Private: Yeah.... that is weird.
Skipper: I'm gonna go see what Gravin's up to.
Private: Are Ты sure? Remember, Gravin has cameras!
Skipper: Oh that's right..... we can't risk losing when we got so far!
Private: Guess it's back to sleep then.....
Skipper: For you....
Private: What?? You're still going??
Skipper: Well yeah, I can't resist!
Private: I can't really stop Ты anymore, so I guess i'm in too.
Skipper: Alright. Remember, you'll need lots and lots of stealth.
Private: Don't worry Skipper! Stealth is my middle name!
Skipper: No it's not.
Private: I know....
*A few минуты of stealth later*
Skipper: Here's his window. Bingo! Theres the food!
Private: And a really big pot! Wait.... he's going to make суп isn't he!?
Skipper: He made us get all of those things just so he can make some lousy soup!? Oh no, he's not going to play this game with these birds. Lets head back. I have an idea.
-The Далее Day-
Gravin: Good morning, campers! Today's the big day!
Skipper: Hey, buddy. Just tell us what the competition is.
Gravin: Both teams must have a gun fight to the death!
Everyone: WHAAATTT?!?!?!?
Po: No way, buddy! We don't roll with guns. We roll with fists!
Tigress: Yeah! There's no way we're doing this.
Gravin: Alright then, I guess Ты guys are kicked out then.
Po: Fine with us!
*Team KFP nods*
Kowalski: So does that mean we win?
Gravin: Not exactly.... Ты six still need to have a gun fight to the death either way.
Marlene: You're kidding.
Gravin: Ты can't bail out like the others did! Ты signed a contract!
Kowalski: When did we sign a contract??
*Skipper begins to back away slowly*
Kowalski: Skipper.....
Skipper: Okay fine! I signed a contract for all of us.
Julien: Ты what!?
Kowalski: What about the other teams? This doesn't make any sense!
Gravin: Enough! Ты are going to have a gun fight to the death whether Ты like it или not! And Ты can't escape, the entire primeter of the forst is protected by an invisible wall! Hehe.
Skipper: I knew I couldn't trust this guy.
*Gravin throws a bag with 6 Оружие in them.
Skipper: Ooh!! I call this one!!
Marlene: Really?? Anyways, they're all the same, Skipper.
Skipper: This one is shinier!
Gravin: Begin!!
*Everyone nods and everyone runs in different directions*
Marlene: Okay, Julien. I can't believe Skipper managed to figure this all out in his sleep and then tell us a carefully organized plan.
Julien: I know.
Marlene: Alright. Lets sneak in Gravin's room and find the button that deactivates the invisible walls.
-meanwhile-
*Skipper, Rico, Private and Kowalski are standing on a small cliff*
Kowalski: Alright, Skipper. Don't forget about the plan!
Skipper: Why would I, Kowalski??
*Skipper shoots and misses Kowalski*
Kowalski: What was that for??
Skipper: Hmm? Oh nothing. I'm just trying to run out of bullets slowly.
Private: Uh oh... I think Skippers gone completely.....
Rico: Cookoo?
Skipper: What do Ты mean, Private? I'm not crazy!
*Skipper suddenly shoots Rico and Private and they fall off the cliff*
Kowalski: Skipper! What did Ты do??
*Kowalski drops his gun and stares down the cliff while the wind is randomly blowing*
Skipper: Okay, Kowalski. Now it's you're turn.
*Skipper shoots, and Kowalski falls off*
*Suddenly, Gravin comes out of nowhere, clapping*
Gravin: Congratulations, Skipper. Ты win, this delicious bowl of soup!
Skipper: YES! I WIN!!!
*Skipper gulps the суп down and then wipes his mouth*
Skipper: Wait.... what was that??
Gravin: It was poisen, Skipper. Allow me to give off me true identidy. I am Prof. Gravin, mad monkey scientist. I use to be a stupid testing monkey, so I wanted to get revenge on the humans. And I couldn't let Ты Four in my way.
Skipper: Gee, Gravin. That souds a lot like a certain Dolphin....
Gravin: What?
Skipper: Nevermind. WHAT?!?! Ты POISENED ME!?
Gravin: Yes i did, my plan went perfect.
Skipper: Well, you're just forgetting one thing.
Gravin: What's that??
Skipper: I can't be brainwashed, monkey!
*Suddenly the 3 penguins that "supposedly" got shot jump up from the cliff, glisten in the sun, and land perfectly on the cliff, and the penguins form they're famous pose*
Gravin: What? How!!
Skipper: Simple. It was all sound effects, fake blood, and good acting.
Kowalski, Rico and Private: Yeah!
Gravin: It doesn't matter! Without you're leader, Ты will be.... uh... leaderless?
*The penguins stare at him*
Skipper: Wow.... that was just....
Private: Bad....
Skipper: Anyways, get him!
*All the penguins tackle him and tie him up*
Gravin: Blast! Ты penguins got lucky. Hey, why are Ты still shooting this? Turn the camera off!
*Suddenly Skipper begins to choke, and falls to the ground*
Private: Skipper!! I think the poisen struck!
Skipper: Eh, don't worry Private. It's just acting.
Rico: Phew!
Private: Ты really got me....
Kowalski: Wait this doesn't add up..... how did you...?
Skipper: Simple. Let this flashback demonstrate.
*Flashback*
Skipper: When Private and I went back to sleep, I woke up again, snuck into Gravin's room, and swapped the ingredients with fake copies. Also, while I was there, Gravin was sleep talking his entire plan..... Which was an epic fail.....
Gravin: Darn.... I could have gotten away with it too.... if it wasn't for you-
Skipper: Ep-ep-ep..... I think the folks at Главная are pretty tired of Scooby-doo references.
*The invisable walls disable*
Skipper: Looks like Marlene and Julien did the job. Lets go home, boys.
*Later... on the road*
Skipper: Ahh. Perfect.
Marlene: I like this.
Julien: Can Ты Переместить any faster? We're never getting to the Central Park Zoo with Ты carrying us like that!
Gravin: I'm trying!! Sheesh. I can't pick ALL of Ты up at the same time!
Skipper: Nonsense. It's the perfect punishment for you. And also.... I had something else in mind.
-back at the zoo-
Gravin: Uhh.... why am I in a box?
*Skipper stamps a "Hoboken" stamp on the box, and the box is taken with the truck.
Kowalski: Heh. Do Ты send all of you'r enemies to Hoboken?
Skipper: Well, I didn't send Julien! Yet....
Julien: Oh thank yo- wait a minute, what is that suppose to mean!?
[The End]
posted by SJF_Penguin2
link if Ты would like to access the first chapter.

--------------------------------------------------

Off the Shelf
A Penguins of Madagascar fanfic
Chapter 2: "Career Change"

Liz glanced at her daughter in the back сиденье, место, сиденья through the rearview mirror of her silver Subaru Outback. "So, have Ты named your little Друзья yet?"

"Yes." Chelsea held Skipper up. "This is Mr. Penguin." And then held up Marlene. "And this is Mrs. Penguin."

"No, no, sweetie. The brown one is an otter. Remember the story I told Ты in the gift shop?"

"I know she's an otter, Mom. But she changed her name when she got married."

"Married?"...
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“I Insist”
September 27, 2014


“All right, men. I want a perimeter. Make it fast, make it wide, and make it where Ты can see everything, but nothing can see you,” Skipper ordered the team in Central Park. “On my mar —”

“Hey, aren’t Ты those penguins from the aquarium?” Фред interrupted as he approached them.

Skipper rolled his eyes. “Zoo, actually. What do Ты want, Fred? We’re in the middle of something,” he asked impatiently.

“Yeah, I’m in the middle of something too. I think it’s called Central Park. Anyway, I was just wondering, is that выдра, оттер friend of yours...
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“Another Side”
April 26, 2014


    Skipper led a blindfolded Marlene into her cave.

    “Skipper, what is this? What’s the big surprise?” Marlene urged with anticipation.

    “Well, remember a couple of weeks назад when Ты сказал(-а) you’ve always wanted to stargaze, but couldn’t because of the bright city lights?” Skipper asked, preparing to remove the blindfold.

    “Yes, why?” Marlene answered.

    Skipper pulled off the blindfold. “That’s why,” he сказал(-а) with a grin.

    Marlene...
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No Time 07.14.16

“Maurice!” Julien cried from his throne.

Maurice trudged up to him, not even trying to hide his contempt. “Yes, your majesty?”

“I need another smoothie,” Julien said, propping his head up with one paw while rubbing his chest with the other. He coughed and wheezed. “I can feel my time approaching . . . so make it with extra манго for the extra sweet-y-ness-ness . . .”

Maurice rolled his eyes. “You сказал(-а) your time was approaching two days ago,” he said.

“Well, how should I know, Maurice? I am not Clair’s Voyage!” Julien сказал(-а) before coughing again.

“It’s...
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Foreign 02.24.16

“Morning, Nari!” Marlene сказал(-а) one morning, excitedly nudging her habitat-mate and adoptive sister. “Come on, wake up!” she urged, eager to get out in the Monterey sun.

Nari stretched her arms and legs with a yawn as she sat up. “Marlene, the morning will still be there in ten minutes,” she complained with a smile.

Marlene laughed and pulled her arm. “Don’t be a wimp! Come on! Let’s go for a swim!”

The two went outside their cave-like room out into the California spring morning, Marlene at the lead while Nari lagged behind. Marlene голубь into their pond while...
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added by Featherson
Source: Пингвины Мадагаскара
posted by peacebaby7
Author’s Note: This is my sixth installment of skits. My first was regular everyday scenarios (link), then Skilene-themed skits (link), then a set for the villains (link), then a set starring the lemurs (link), then a humanized set (link), and lastly, Dorski-themed skits (link). I now present to my readers, Dave Skits! I had loads of fun with this one and I hope Ты all enjoy them. By the way, I certainly did not do this as an excuse to make celebrity puns. I’m not sure why Ты would think that . . .

61) Time is Money [XXVIII]

“I want to thank Ты for meeting with me, Mr. Miyoshi. Your...
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posted by Mother-of-PoM
Then, there were gone. Private went into the bathroom where he noticed something he didn't notice before. A key was sitting Далее to the bathtub. He started to walk in front of the bathtub to get to the key but a zombie threw itself out of the bathtub making him yelp and back away.

'Around the tub then...'

Private was thankful the zombie didn't Переместить as he made his way around. He smiled and picked up the key. Then the zombie lunged at him, Private screamed and moved to doge it then slid out of the room and slammed the door shut. His eyes widened. A doll with red feathers and amber eyes was walking...
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posted by Mother-of-PoM
(This was made for my own enjoyment of PoM and Mad Father, plus I have to get this out of my head XD This takes place before Private even joined the team and this is not cannon. Its fanmade. So without further jibber jabbers, enjoy.)

A small black flipper knocked against a steel door. He frowned when no one answered the door.

"Big Brothah?" He tried again, "Are Ты in there Blue?" He inquired lowly, he has been warned over and again not to raise his voice in the house. He stepped aside as the door opened and his big brother came out. "Big brothah!" He smiled brightly.

The пингвин in front of him...
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Smile 09.06.15

“Operation: Холодное сердце is a success!” Skipper said, holding up his successfully retrieved snow cone.

Kowalski sighed. “Too bad they were out of blueberry,” he muttered in disappointment.

Skipper rolled his eyes. “Let it go,” he said. He turned toward the others. “Let’s head back to HQ.”

The penguins started their journey back through Central Park to the zoo, happily licking at their snow cones in the mid-summer heat. But when they were about halfway there, Private grabbed his leader’s shoulder to bring him to a stop.

“Wait, Skipper, look over there,” he сказал(-а) pointing...
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Dying 04.04.15

Note: This installment is humanized.

— § —

Skipper sat in the emergency room waiting area, his face in his hands, as he waited for the doctor to come back with news. His college roommate and best friend, Kowalski, sat Далее to him, wishing he could think of something to say to bring him comfort. They’d been waiting there for almost an hour. Finally, a surgeon stepped out of the operating room, her hands and arms wet after scrubbing out. She pulled his face mask under her chin.

“Mr. Guin?” she inquired toward Skipper, who stood.

“Yes. How is she?” he asked rubbing his...
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added by Sheila-Daimond
 "Breaking News!"
"Breaking News!"
This part was a lot of fun to write! Please review!

"Breaking news!" the tall, blonde haired news reporter exclaimed. "I'm live to you, from the Arctic! Today, November 26th, 2004, there was an avalanche, spreading across the great portion of a mountain! Luckily, there was only person in its path, and he is only suffering minor injuries. Here he is now!"

Now there was a man, the same man that the group of Arctic Животные had saved from the avalanche. The blonde reporter held her microphone up and asked: "How did Ты manage to get out of that with only a broken nose?"

The man, who still seemed traumatized...
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Eight Months Later

Kowalski woke with a yawn and hopped down from the вверх bunk. He slugged his way over to the coffee machine to start Skipper’s brew when he realized it’d already been made. Suddenly alert, he turned to see Skipper’s bunk empty and a faint light coming from under his lab door. He gently pushed it open and peered in.

Skipper was facing away from him at the parallel bars Rico had built for him when he’d finally stood up from his wheelchair two weeks ago. So far, he hadn’t been able to do much but stand and pivot, but Skipper kept swearing he could feel in his gut that...
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added by ILUVKOWALSKI
Source: Me
posted by TheRatKing1
link

“Crazy Old Cat Lady”

“The Penguins of Madagascar”

Season 4 Episode 7 (4X07)

Production Code: 407

Previous: “The дельфин Who Hired Me”
Next: “Porpoise With a Purpose”

Crazy Old Cat Lady/Transcript

Scene I: Gladys’ Apartment

(Nana and Gladys are sitting down at Gladys’ coffee table, drinking чай and laughing)

Nana: (Chuckling) So I сказал(-а) to him, “My Handbag!” and I WALLOPED him right where it hurt! He was a very bad kitty, that Alex! Oh (giggles) yes he was!

Gladys: Oh but dear, how did Ты ever get out of Africa in the first place?

Nana: Oi, Gladys, it was quite the trip! I had...
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added by Cowtails
The moon shone its rays over the treetops, lighting up my way. The forest was silent, except for the sound of my beating heart, which I hoped only I could hear. This was a suicide mission; it was either do или die. If Blowhole was defeated, I would finally get my revenge. On the other hand, if I lost, I would not have long to live.
I almost jumped out of my feathers when an owl screamed at me to get out of his territory. I think he was afraid that I was going to steal his mice. I would not loose sleep over it. I had sworn never to eat a мышь again unless it was a dire emergency.
Have Ты ever...
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Note: This is a short chapter just to conclude things up. Hope Ты enjoyed it!

“Kowalski, tell me you’ve cracked this thing,” сказал(-а) Skipper. “The humans will arrive at any moment.”
“Almost there, Skipper. Just a few еще touches.”
Private turned to his leader. “Skipper! Someone’s coming!”
“Kowalski! It’s now или never!”
Kowalski hit the send button. “Mission accomplished, sir.”
“Go! Go! Go!”
The team made it up to the air vent just in time. The humans walked into the room. “I could have sworn I’d closed the lights.”
“Nah, you’re crazy.”
“It’s...
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Rico had awoken...he was strapped to a таблица in a dark room....he was frightened and wondered where he was...he struggled and screamed asking where he was...but all he could do was do that...until he heard a door slowly open...

Rico: let me go!! Now whoever Ты are или your gonna be sorry!!

???:I can't Bieleve I finally captured you....and it was too easy....hehehe...

It was the man who kidnapped Rico at the zoo...he walked up to Rico and smiled down on at him...

Rico:(up chucks bomb at him)

The man dodges the bomb and quickly gets back over near him...the man is now angry and punches Rico in the...
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