Answer These Вопросы as Sarcastically as Possible

1: The power to ignore stupid questions.

Oh, look, I have it.

1) If Ты could have a superpower what would it be?
Farting. Ты don't know how awesome it would be!

2) What is the meaning to life?
Where it sucks.

3) How do Ты know if someone is truly dead?
Well Ты stab them and if they do not say "Ow!" или "scream" then they are truly dead.

4) Are Ты an idiot?
The real Вопрос is, are Ты an idiot?

5) Are Ты being sarcastic?
No, Not at all. Why would I be?

6) Why do people think?
Oh nothing except me being amazing and awesome and epic and cool and beautiful and pretty and cute and lovely and uplifting and special and alluring and Храбрая сердцем and bright and dashing and confident and kind and wonderful and rhetorical and quiet and epic... oops did i say epic again?

7) Whats 9 + 10 ?
Wait... let me open my calculator.

8) Can рыба swim?
No, they fly in the water.

9) Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.
They miss their males unlike humans.

10) Are these things interesting?
I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that Ты wouldn't understand me.

#1: Yeah because that TOTALLY hasn never been asked before..

#2: how should I know!?

#3: Ты ask them.

#4: yes.. Yes I am

#5: No, I'm being a tree!

#6: Because they DO

#7: 5!

#8: No they fly!

#9: They hiss because there bored!

#10: About as interesting as my foot!

1: The power that nobody else has. Rocket powered shit. Everybody poops, but mine is the only one that'll knock a house down!

2: Didn't we already cover this in Taika's question? Donuts.

3: Показать them some BVB songs. If they weren't dead before, they will be.

4: Yes, I am an Incredibly Delicious Imbicile of Otherworldly Terror.

5: Probably. Are you?

6: Cuz the wi-fi is out.

7: Hey, I'm a rocket-shitter, not a mathematician.

8: Do they? или do they simply walk through water?

9: Seems those snakes are desperate for a man.

Oh yeah I'm totally going to sit here and answer all these Вопросы as sarcastically as possible...

Here, have this dead serious picture instead:

:3

1. Traveling through time and Космос because I'm The Doctor!

2. 42, DURR.

3. By them walking around like a zombie, and charging at us as if they're about to eat our brains!

4. Oh, gee, I don't know. How about Ты answer that Вопрос for yourself?

5. OH, GEE, WHAT TOLD Ты THAT?

6. I don't know, because it keeps them from being morons!

7. 21! What else could the answer POSSIBLY be!? NINETEEN?

8. NO. (Imagine this in a sarcastic tone btw)

9. Oh, I don't know, because female snakes are huge flipping rebels who couldn't give less of a s*** about the world!

10. Ah, gee, I don't know, MAYBE THEY ARE!

"answer these Вопросы as sarcastically as possible" oh yeah because i wasn't going to do that anyway, right?

-If Ты could have a superpower what would it be: i already have a superpower: invisibility, nobody ever notices me...
-What is the meaning to life: Life: noun; the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by growth through metabolism, reproduction, and the power of adaptation to environment through changes originating internally.
-How do Ты know if someone is truly dead: poke them with stick, if no response, they dead
-Are Ты an idiot: what kind of stupid Вопрос is that, of course im a fuckin idiot!
-Are Ты being sarcastic: no, these Ответы are completely serious, no sarcasm at all
-Why do people think: wait... people think? i must be living in the wrong planet
-Whats 9 + 10: nine hundred and ten, idiot
-Can рыба swim: statistically, the #1 cause of deaths in рыба is drowning. does this answer our question?
-Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.: idunno man, if my diet consisted of only live rodents, id be pretty irritable too
-Are these things interesting: i am еще interested in the study of which трава grows the quickest based on my own observations

1. Hmm, the power to not take any of this seriously.
2. To ACTUALLY be someone important in life.
3. When they get up and straight-up TELL Ты they're dead...
4. I'm out of here, I'm catching stupid.
5. Noo, I'm taking this so serious, I'm laughing at this.
6. Probably so they can think before asking stupid questions.
7. I don't know, they'll probably teach Ты in college или something, since it's soo hard.
8. No, they fish-paddle. 🐟
9. Do I look like a snake? 🐍
10. As interesting as watching paint dry...
~ Phew! I tried to answer these as sarcastically as I could, so don't take this too seriously... 😋

1) If Ты could have a superpower what would it be?
Belching. I'd make everybody vomit from the smell.

2) What is the meaning to life?
Life and Death and nothing else

3) How do Ты know if someone is truly dead?
By tearing their hearts out

4) Are Ты an idiot?
No, that sounds like you, dude

5) Are Ты being sarcastic?
No, I'm awesome!

6) Why do people think?
Because they're empty headed

7) Whats 9 + 10 ?
19 dumbass

8) Can рыба swim?
No they walk on the beach

9) Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.
Because they're slithery legless b**ches

10) Are these things interesting?
Um.. sure why not

let's do this...
alright here we go
~

1) If Ты could have a superpower what would it be?

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2) What is the meaning to life?

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3) How do Ты know if someone is truly dead?

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4) Are Ты an idiot?

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5) Are Ты being sarcastic?

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6) Why do people think?

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7) Whats 9 + 10 ?

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8) Can рыба swim?

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9) Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.

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10) Are these things interesting?

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1) If Ты could have a superpower what would it be?

Yo Mom

2) What is the meaning to life?

Yo Mom

3) How do Ты know if someone is truly dead?

Yo Mama

4) Are Ты an idiot?

Yo Mama's an idiot

5) Are Ты being sarcastic?

Is Yo Mom?

6) Why do people think?

Yo Mom

7) Whats 9 + 10 ?

Yo Mom

8) Can рыба swim?

Yo Mama Can't

9) Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.

Yo Mom

10) Are these things interesting?

Yo Mom

1. To mute anyone that was extremely stupid so I wouldn't ever have to hear their dialogue and have inferior people bow before me.

2.Aliens won't ever tell humans that because we unfortunately as a species are stupid.

3.Gee i don't know, people die when they are killed so based on that. That would be how Ты determine if someone is truly dead.

4. I think alot of people can't compete with my intelligence so if I am an idiot then everyone else is lower than an idiot.

5.Maybe I am maybe I am not. I do if people truly knew me they would know that I am half being sarcastic and half way not.

6.People think so they don't just exist, или at least attempt to sound smart rather than being known as the village idiot who doesn't think at all.

7.42

8.Fish can actually walk on land. It's been proven.

9.That is a Вопрос I doubt even greater beings than us can answer.

10.Perhaps they are interesting and perhaps they aren't. Who knows really.

1) If Ты could have a superpower what would it be?

The power to know why the hell you're asking me this crap.

2) What is the meaning to life?

What meaning isnt there to life?

3) How do Ты know if someone is truly dead?

When they're truly dead.

4) Are Ты an idiot?

doo ah rite lyk an eedeeut?


5) Are Ты being sarcastic?

Gee, I don't know.

6) Why do people think?

Think about it.

7) Whats 9 + 10 ?

Nine plus ten

8) Can рыба swim?

Do they live in the freakin ocean?

9) Why do female snakes hiss? I mean, female snakes arent guys so they shouldnt his-s.

You're TOTALLY right! Why don't they just heerrrrsss all over the damn place then?

10) Are these things interesting?

I dunno, there are еще interesting words than 'These things.'