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posted by usernameinvalid
As my foot descends, it comes in contact with and crushes something small and brittle. I look down to see that small skeletons litter the ground beneath my feet. They are indiscernible. Some look ever so slightly familiar, approximations of the skeletal configurations of Кошки или dogs, but most are entirely foreign. The wind sweeps the dust into the air in small clouds that swirl around me. As they swirl they seem to form letters, perhaps even words. I cannot tell what they say. Their meaning is Остаться в живых to me.

The opening becomes closer; the call еще desperate and alluring. I can no longer feel...
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posted by usernameinvalid
I Любовь jigsaw puzzles. So when I found one on my phone that allowed me to make any size puzzle I want with a snap of a picture I was hooked. I started by taking pictures of Болталка shots in my room, clicked “cut” then “mix” and poof, I was off wasting time. After about 30 минуты of putting my “room” back together I decided to take a picture of myself to cut up and puzzle.

I decided to cut the picture for the puzzle at an expert difficulty. It was pretty awesome seeing my face трещина, сплит into hundreds of different puzzle pieces, each one flaking off one by one like an ember to the floor...
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posted by FrostyBlazer
Lucius : oh what a night!

Slender : late December back in 63!

LJ : what a very special time for me!

KIBS : because I remember what a night!

Slender: KIBS!?

KIBS: sup Slender! hey Reggie, BEST BACKSEAT EVER!

Mrs.P: it's not a bac-

KIBS: its in the back and I can set down on the bed. its a back seat

Mrs.P: but-

KIBS: your argument is invalid

Slender: who else did you bring along Reggie?

Reggie: I brought Soul, but he is in the bathroom

SL : how the hell am I supposed to unzip my pants!

Slender: oh

Reggie: try using your mouth!

SL : K!
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posted by usernameinvalid
If an old lady asks Ты to help her make a quilt, it’s best to politely decline.

In the area surrounding the town of Pearl, Mississippi, people began to go missing. Eyewitness reports told of a set of three elderly ladies. The word was that at least one of the three would talk to the victims before they would mysteriously vanish in the following days.

One lady, possibly the last intended victim, was approached by one of the women about helping her and her two other Друзья make a quilt. She mentioned that they would pay well. Before the old lady left, she handed the woman a business card.

Luckily...
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posted by usernameinvalid
After staring at a laminate Телевидение in the dark, I start to get sleepy. My eyes droop and the feeling of my body in unconsciousness starts to take its toll. Like a trance with my brain buzzing and my mouth hanging slightly open.

I remember that my brother, Claudio, lies on his side diagonally from the television. A marathon of True Blood is on and I had sworn to catch up on the story. Being that the clock strikes 2 in the morning, my body caves in. My eyes flutter closed. Calmly, my head lies against the couch. Soundly, my сердце beats to the pendulum inside the father clock. Breathing, so...
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posted by FrostyBlazer
LJ: hello bozos! *almost throws-up*

EJ: sorry guys, he is extremely drunk

LJ: I may be drunk, but i'm way better killers tha- *falls down stairs*

Lucius: classic

Slender: what the hell happened to you!

Lucius: well at least he doesn't look like The Joker and Barney got stuck in a blender...

Jeff: hey!

LJ: I Остаться в живых my job in the SOK

Slender: Ты worked for the SOK?!

LJ: could Ты blame me? I wasn't working for Ты any еще so I decided to work for Lumar

Slender: we will talk about this later, could we stay?

LJ: why the hell not? I have nothing else to loose...

Lucius: Эй, Masky, why are Ты being so quiet?

Masky: *shrugs*

I intentionally made him quiet for that joke :D
posted by FrostyBlazer
*meanwhile*

Johnny: so i'm like "fuc* that noise! I want my paycheck!"

Clockwork: please kill me...

Porter: I would but I can't hit a girl

Clockwork: screw you...

Masky: guys!

Porter: what?

Masky: we have company!

*woosh*

Trevor: STORM THE HOUSE!

Swain: since when were Ты the leader?

SkinTaker: he does have a point...

Trevor: look, lets just kill the proxys and not talk about this

Swain: yea... Ты are not going to doge this...

Trevor: *sigh*

Boots: ... (good thing I brought popcorn)
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