♥ Excuse my laziness. I'm fucking tired.

9. Aurora

They should call her A-bore-a. Hahahahahaha. I have a comedic gift. That was so punny. Anyway, Ты snooze Ты lose and since that's exactly what she did for the majority of the film, she gets ninth spot. She seems very sweet and is extremely pretty though. She actually has one really funny moment that people seem to forget.
Phillip: When will I see Ты again?
Aurora: Oh never! Never!
Phillip: Never?
Aurora: Well, maybe someday.
Phillip: When, tomorrow?
Aurora: Oh no! This evening!

8. Tiana

She's super cute as a kid and has an awesome solo number. Unfortunately she's an animal for a lot of the movie and I always preferred the human centric Дисней movies. Also she's a bit of a wet blanket. Come on girl, loosen up. They were probably worried that if they didn't make her super uptight and organized, they'd get accused of racism for making the only Black chick the lazy slob.

7. Pocahontas

Easily the most stunning princess. This girl is so real looking. She's the most beautiful Дисней character I've ever seen. She even surpasses Esmeralda for me. Unfortunately she spends most of her time cliff jumping, posing, and running. I wish she was a little spunkier. Poca, it will NOT kill Ты to smile every once in a while.

6. Cinderella

I Любовь her, she is one of the prettiest princesses. Tied with Poca, in my books. But she is a victim of daily abuse so her personality has been watered down due to her tormented life. I'm sure she gets a bit bubblier when she's in the jacuzzi with that guy she marries.

5. Snow White

Oh my God, this girl cracks me up! She's so fucking annoying and everyone in the movie clearly notices. Like when she sees a chair, she screams and all the Животные run out, looking freaked out by her overreaction. And when she's wishing on her яблоко the old hag is like: Fine, whatever, now take a bite Ты little bitch! Anyway, I'm a sucker for a super annoying yet somehow loveable character.

4. Jasmine

Not gonna lie, I Любовь her because she's just a tad bitchy. I relate to her because she is just on superbitch mode 24/7. She only lets her guard down when she's with Rajah или Aladdin. I Любовь how she tells Аладдин to jump off the balcony. How many other princesses casually encourage suicide to someone who hasn't really even done anything wrong? HILARIOUS. It's basically Дисней lingo for "Go fuck yourself and then die in a hole."

3. Belle

I Любовь how she's just such a loser. It's kind of amusing. She's the first ever anti-social princess. At least she sings well and is selfless. Although I stand by my theory that BATB romantiticizes abusive relationships. Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome, Belle? IT'S CALLED A KIDNAP VICTIM GROWING EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO THEIR CAPTOR. Ring a BELLE? Hahahaha, my секунда pun in one article. I'm on a roll. I don't really know why I like her. Probably just tradition because I liked her a lot as a kid.

2. Mulan

I technically should like her еще than my number 1 because she is super awesome but for some reason my сердце will always belong to...

1. Ariel

She's a mermaid. She swims around and looks cool when she's exploring. She sings the best song evaaa. She's adventurous. She's angsty. She's got just a smidge of bitchy in her. She's just the best. End of story, ok?