Today, I diagnosed metastatic cancer in a new patient who had just come to see me. I had to tell this young, beautiful, vibrant woman that did not not have long to live, perhaps a few months. There was nothing I could do for her. All I could do was to tell her that I cared for her. I could Показать her my professional “love.” My consultation Сообщить was faxed to the patient’s referring primary physician, and an час later, the physician called me, in disbelief. Together on the phone, we could only share a sense of profound loss.
Ты might read this and think: Любовь is useless in this case. Любовь will not cure her cancer, nor will Любовь protect her from the pain and suffering that is imminent. And Ты would be absolutely correct. But what is the alternative to love? Is it hate? Is it apathy?
When I was younger, I used to consider that only actions and accomplishments are truly useful. Ты can Список them, objectively and concretely. Ты can measure productivity and compare the results to other people’s activities. But when there is no useful action, as in this case, is there nothing left but despair? When someone hurts you, is there nothing to do but retaliate? Medically, it has been shown that hate hurts Ты physically just as much, if not more, than the person Ты hate. Scientifically, it has been shown that despair pains Ты mentally just as much, if not more, than actual bodily trauma.
So, should Ты choose “love”, because it is the lesser of two evils? Well, I certainly do not think so. As I get older and accumulate еще knowledge and experience, I realize еще how little control I have over life in general. Maybe Ты did not have a good childhood, perhaps people have done horrible things to you, natural disasters occur, and now Ты are helpless.
Please realize that the only thing Ты have under your control is how Ты feel and how Ты will react to external events. Unless Ты have a psychiatric illness, Ты can choose to “love” или Ты can choose to “hate.” None of us lives forever. Do Ты want to wait until you’re lying on your deathbed before Ты think “maybe I should have been nicer to this person или to that person?” или do Ты want to evaluate every день of your life whether Ты have contributed in some way some Любовь to the world that day? I offer Ты my humble opinion that “Love is THE answer – every день of the year!”
Ты might read this and think: Любовь is useless in this case. Любовь will not cure her cancer, nor will Любовь protect her from the pain and suffering that is imminent. And Ты would be absolutely correct. But what is the alternative to love? Is it hate? Is it apathy?
When I was younger, I used to consider that only actions and accomplishments are truly useful. Ты can Список them, objectively and concretely. Ты can measure productivity and compare the results to other people’s activities. But when there is no useful action, as in this case, is there nothing left but despair? When someone hurts you, is there nothing to do but retaliate? Medically, it has been shown that hate hurts Ты physically just as much, if not more, than the person Ты hate. Scientifically, it has been shown that despair pains Ты mentally just as much, if not more, than actual bodily trauma.
So, should Ты choose “love”, because it is the lesser of two evils? Well, I certainly do not think so. As I get older and accumulate еще knowledge and experience, I realize еще how little control I have over life in general. Maybe Ты did not have a good childhood, perhaps people have done horrible things to you, natural disasters occur, and now Ты are helpless.
Please realize that the only thing Ты have under your control is how Ты feel and how Ты will react to external events. Unless Ты have a psychiatric illness, Ты can choose to “love” или Ты can choose to “hate.” None of us lives forever. Do Ты want to wait until you’re lying on your deathbed before Ты think “maybe I should have been nicer to this person или to that person?” или do Ты want to evaluate every день of your life whether Ты have contributed in some way some Любовь to the world that day? I offer Ты my humble opinion that “Love is THE answer – every день of the year!”
