new moon, bellas depresstion. the 1st few months
it hurts to live. life to me is a секунда death, only like being left to bleed on a pavement instead of a quick stab, then to be left in peace. death and life are much the same thing now. only death seems еще peaceful, i already know, as i watch other people living there lives, there is nothing left for me. fun was like a greek word to me now. i didnt know what i ment. i thought about making the most of life before the pain killed me for sure. i couldnt remember HOW to have fun. what was the point of going to the beach? it wasn't going to bring my future back. it wouldnt make me feel any better. what was the point of going to the movies? it wasnt going to fill my sad eyes with excitment. i wasn't going to get better. not ever. i was going to be a girl that lived with no reason to live that had a life only of pain, her сердце Остаться в живых and her body cut into half. the pain was too much to bear. it took over, the pain never left, it flowed in my blood untill the poisen punched holes in my сердце over and over untill all the feelings of Любовь and happiness are washed out with my blood. the funny thing was; well, there wasnt anything that was funny about it; i hated to think of him. i hated to think of the happiness he suddenly brought into my life. because, i thought, because, deep deep in my сердце where my thoughts were безопасно, сейф from causing me any еще unbearable pain, i knew that he was somewhere in the world, oblivious to the damage that he had left behind. i knew that he was carrying on with his life, and that he was proably with someone much еще beautiful then me by now, holding them in his stone arms. someone that he wasn't wasting his life by being with. someone that wouldnt turn into a wrinkled old lady in 60 years. but it wasn't his fault. he didnt know how deep i really was and how he was like a drug to me. he didnt know. или maybe he did. maybe he felt uncomfortable with me loving him so, when he didnt Любовь me back. only he never had told me this because he was afraid of hurting me. he was the most selfless person ever. the ache for him made me feel sick, my eyes burned and prickled. i stared ahead waiting for my tears to dry, but by one flicker of movment, the hot beads of salt water rolled down my cold cheeks. i didnt blush anymore. my Шоколад brown eyes grew dark and empty. my limp hair hung, dead in a ponytail. i walked past my mirror, catching a glimpse of my reflection. i blinked and еще tears fell to the carpet. i turned away, not able to watch and to look at the face of a sad little heartbroken girl. i stared at the floor, my pain burning a hole in the ground with the emptyness of my eyes. i stumbled on my way to the door, even though i was still staring at my feet. i fell to the ground, and broke into desperate, heartbroken sobs that would probably scare charlie. i crossed my legs as i sat up weakly, staring into space, wishing i didnt have stupid human eyes, that i had vampire eyes that could see every dust mote in the air. every pattern in the wood of my bedleg. every brush line on the Стена and every leaf on the trees outside, through the forest and across the mountins, the пляж, пляжный in la push, wishing i could see the world through my window, being able to pick out him out like a needle on a haystack, and bringing him Главная to me so i could hold him and never let him go. i knew i wouldnt be able to fight him as he would loosen my grip, as he strode off into the world once еще and broke my сердце again.
it hurts to live. life to me is a секунда death, only like being left to bleed on a pavement instead of a quick stab, then to be left in peace. death and life are much the same thing now. only death seems еще peaceful, i already know, as i watch other people living there lives, there is nothing left for me. fun was like a greek word to me now. i didnt know what i ment. i thought about making the most of life before the pain killed me for sure. i couldnt remember HOW to have fun. what was the point of going to the beach? it wasn't going to bring my future back. it wouldnt make me feel any better. what was the point of going to the movies? it wasnt going to fill my sad eyes with excitment. i wasn't going to get better. not ever. i was going to be a girl that lived with no reason to live that had a life only of pain, her сердце Остаться в живых and her body cut into half. the pain was too much to bear. it took over, the pain never left, it flowed in my blood untill the poisen punched holes in my сердце over and over untill all the feelings of Любовь and happiness are washed out with my blood. the funny thing was; well, there wasnt anything that was funny about it; i hated to think of him. i hated to think of the happiness he suddenly brought into my life. because, i thought, because, deep deep in my сердце where my thoughts were безопасно, сейф from causing me any еще unbearable pain, i knew that he was somewhere in the world, oblivious to the damage that he had left behind. i knew that he was carrying on with his life, and that he was proably with someone much еще beautiful then me by now, holding them in his stone arms. someone that he wasn't wasting his life by being with. someone that wouldnt turn into a wrinkled old lady in 60 years. but it wasn't his fault. he didnt know how deep i really was and how he was like a drug to me. he didnt know. или maybe he did. maybe he felt uncomfortable with me loving him so, when he didnt Любовь me back. only he never had told me this because he was afraid of hurting me. he was the most selfless person ever. the ache for him made me feel sick, my eyes burned and prickled. i stared ahead waiting for my tears to dry, but by one flicker of movment, the hot beads of salt water rolled down my cold cheeks. i didnt blush anymore. my Шоколад brown eyes grew dark and empty. my limp hair hung, dead in a ponytail. i walked past my mirror, catching a glimpse of my reflection. i blinked and еще tears fell to the carpet. i turned away, not able to watch and to look at the face of a sad little heartbroken girl. i stared at the floor, my pain burning a hole in the ground with the emptyness of my eyes. i stumbled on my way to the door, even though i was still staring at my feet. i fell to the ground, and broke into desperate, heartbroken sobs that would probably scare charlie. i crossed my legs as i sat up weakly, staring into space, wishing i didnt have stupid human eyes, that i had vampire eyes that could see every dust mote in the air. every pattern in the wood of my bedleg. every brush line on the Стена and every leaf on the trees outside, through the forest and across the mountins, the пляж, пляжный in la push, wishing i could see the world through my window, being able to pick out him out like a needle on a haystack, and bringing him Главная to me so i could hold him and never let him go. i knew i wouldnt be able to fight him as he would loosen my grip, as he strode off into the world once еще and broke my сердце again.
When she first looked into her daughters dark Шоколад eyes she felt Любовь and happiness. The soft broze curls in her hair shot a feeling of hope in her body;that she was alive.She felt Любовь for this little one.
A kind of Любовь she had never felt before:of Любовь and protection. The kind of Любовь a mother feels.A Любовь so passionate it hurt for her to feel.
The Энджел looking back at her was the most beutiful she had ever seen. No one had ever imagined such beuty.
Then the little cherub clutched her mothers finger and the two felt Любовь and happiness forever.
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A kind of Любовь she had never felt before:of Любовь and protection. The kind of Любовь a mother feels.A Любовь so passionate it hurt for her to feel.
The Энджел looking back at her was the most beutiful she had ever seen. No one had ever imagined such beuty.
Then the little cherub clutched her mothers finger and the two felt Любовь and happiness forever.
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10. Beg him not to eat you.
9. Inform him that he seems to be the “depressed” Cullen.
8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.
7. Spell his name with two “a”’s (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must have gone to his brain.
6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.
5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming Ты have come to suck his blood.
4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.
3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the пересекать, крест and cry, “The power of Christ compels you!”.
2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alice’s room and videotape his reaction.
And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?
1. Whenever he says anything, snap to attention, shout “Sir, yes sir!” and salute, army style.
9. Inform him that he seems to be the “depressed” Cullen.
8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.
7. Spell his name with two “a”’s (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must have gone to his brain.
6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.
5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming Ты have come to suck his blood.
4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.
3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the пересекать, крест and cry, “The power of Christ compels you!”.
2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alice’s room and videotape his reaction.
And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?
1. Whenever he says anything, snap to attention, shout “Sir, yes sir!” and salute, army style.
Isabella "Bella" Marie лебедь (later Isabella Marie Cullen) is a clumsy, accident-prone teenage girl who moves from Phoenix, Arizona, to Forks, Washington, to live with her father, Charlie. Though many boys are attracted to her when she arrives, she falls in Любовь with Edward Cullen, a mysterious boy she discovers to be a vampire. In an attempt to protect Bella from his lifestyle, Edward leaves her. Bella falls into a depression and is comforted by her friend, Jacob Black. She comes to Любовь Jacob as well, though not as deeply as she loves Edward. She eventually marries Edward and, after a complicated pregnancy, gives birth to their daughter, Renesmee, and becomes a vampire at age 18. After Bella's transformation, she has the ability to shield her and others' minds from mental attacks.