18: Home
The день was nearly over, by now they had reached their destination: Springfield, Illinois. Several times the carriage had stopped, Tristan leaving for short periods of time, always returning silent, the carriage marched on. He had retired when they were almost in Illinois, coming upon the border between Iowa and Illinois. David had remained with Jack and Rosalie, though he kept to himself, For Whom the колокол, колокольчик, белл Tolls had been replaced with A Tale of Two Cities. Eventually though he too went to his room, leaving Jack and Rosalie alone.
They were on the couch, Rosalie’s head on Jack’s chest, right where his сердце should have been beating. It was comforting-laying like this she felt like she was home. She couldn’t even begin to recall the numerous times they had been like this-entwined in each other, feeling his body under hers, listening to his steady breathing, the pulsing of his heart. It was in these times when she could be inhibited and carefree, whether she wanted to laugh hysterically, cry and have fits; she knew she could do so there with no judgment. There, where the sun beat down upon them, the трава younger than them, the ocean in front of them centuries older. There, where there was no eyes watching, no lips gossiping. There, where they could Любовь without restrictions.
There, where they could be free.
She turned her head ever so slightly so she could see his face. His eyes were open, looking up at the ceiling; a crease in his eyebrows told her that he was thinking very hard about something-something he did not like at all.
“What?” she asked him. “What’s wrong?”
Silence answered her at first. She heard him take a breath before he сказал(-а) “I think we should wait.” She turned the words in her mind, sitting up on him, looking at him.
“Wait? What are Ты talking about?”
“Wait until you’re healed. Emotionally, I mean.”
She climbed off him, standing, her arms crossed over her chest, looking down at him. “I’m fine. And once we’re mortal and married I’ll be perfect.”
He sighed and stood as well, though she simply turned her head up to see his face. “You may think you’re fine now, but what happens when we’re human again? When we feel all the human emotions again? Показать them again?”
She looked at him, her eyes narrowed in dangerous slits that made him back away. “I know what I want. Grieve? Been there, done that. The only time I needed to grieve was when I Остаться в живых you-and that hadn’t stopped until I saw Ты again. Yes, part of me hurts for what I’ve Остаться в живых and despite the years Emmett…” Her sentence was cut short but a loud snarl from Jack. She looked at him, a bemused and slightly unnerved smile on her lips. “And I had, it paled in comparison to what we had, no matter how brief it may have been. I’ll take whatever pain comes but you’re worth it.”
He rolled his eyes at her bravado, wanting nothing еще than to grab her and shake her, hoping it would jar her out of this place she was in. “I Любовь you, Rosalie Lillian Hale and because I do, I’m going to promise the following to you: marry you, father your children, protect you, Любовь you, cherish you, but I still think Ты need to grieve first.”
She scowled at him. “Did Ты hear anything I said?”
“Yes. Did Ты hear anything I said?”
“Yes.”
“Isn’t that what Ты want?”
“Yes-with Ты and еще than anything.”
“Fine. Then do as I ask and I will be your slave.”
She stepped closer to him, her eyes wider now and somehow even еще dangerous. “You want me to grieve? To get over my loss?”
“Yes, еще than anything” he practically whispered.
She smirked and kissed him gently, pulling him on the couch, so he was over her. He instantly stopped, making her sigh. “You’re impossible.”
“No Rose Ты are. I tell Ты to grieve and Ты seduce me?”
She shrugged and he just looked at her. “I’m sorry” she finally said, looking at him. He looked at her and sighed, his head falling to his chest. “What?”
“When did everything get so damn complicated? Remember when we were younger and everything was so much simpler. Well, simpler than it is now.”
She nodded her head wistfully saying “yes, I know what Ты mean. It was a far easier time than where we stand now.”
“It wasn’t just the time; it was the way we were around each other. Well, once but…”
“Jack, I know I will feel pain for what I have Остаться в живых but I will be ok. I can’t wait to marry you, can’t wait to have our first child growing inside me. I know this is right. Ты do too. Maybe Ты can’t see it but the only time I feel безопасно, сейф and complete is when I’m with you. Being with Ты feels good. Home”
He looked at her, his body was reacting in a strange way to the way she had сказал(-а) our child…It wasn’t necessarily a bad feeling but it was definitely different. And he liked it. He cocked his head, looking at her still. “First child?”
She smiled. “Did Ты really think I wanted to stop at one?”
He took a breath and sighed though once again from euphoria, not pain. Not even in his wildest dreams-and they got beyond wild at many points-had he thought that this conversation would happen, that Rosalie would be so close that he could touch her. She looked at him, again worried. “I’m fine…Just can’t believe this is real.”
“I know. Surreal.”
He chuckled and gently kissed her, pressing her body closer to his. “Now who’s seducing who?”
He laughed again. “Oh this isn’t seducing.” She smiled and kissed him once еще before she lay back on him, her head going right back to its original position. She felt his body relax, one arm weaving through her hair, the other holding her hand tightly. Yes, this was home.
“Rose?”
“What?”
“Let’s just start with one and maybe work our way up.”
She laughed. “You say that now.”
He kissed the вверх of her hair and she closed her eyes. “Never leave me” she whispered.
“Never ever.” He sealed the promise with a deep, passionate Kiss that made time stand still and the Ангелы in heaven looked down and cheered.
The день was nearly over, by now they had reached their destination: Springfield, Illinois. Several times the carriage had stopped, Tristan leaving for short periods of time, always returning silent, the carriage marched on. He had retired when they were almost in Illinois, coming upon the border between Iowa and Illinois. David had remained with Jack and Rosalie, though he kept to himself, For Whom the колокол, колокольчик, белл Tolls had been replaced with A Tale of Two Cities. Eventually though he too went to his room, leaving Jack and Rosalie alone.
They were on the couch, Rosalie’s head on Jack’s chest, right where his сердце should have been beating. It was comforting-laying like this she felt like she was home. She couldn’t even begin to recall the numerous times they had been like this-entwined in each other, feeling his body under hers, listening to his steady breathing, the pulsing of his heart. It was in these times when she could be inhibited and carefree, whether she wanted to laugh hysterically, cry and have fits; she knew she could do so there with no judgment. There, where the sun beat down upon them, the трава younger than them, the ocean in front of them centuries older. There, where there was no eyes watching, no lips gossiping. There, where they could Любовь without restrictions.
There, where they could be free.
She turned her head ever so slightly so she could see his face. His eyes were open, looking up at the ceiling; a crease in his eyebrows told her that he was thinking very hard about something-something he did not like at all.
“What?” she asked him. “What’s wrong?”
Silence answered her at first. She heard him take a breath before he сказал(-а) “I think we should wait.” She turned the words in her mind, sitting up on him, looking at him.
“Wait? What are Ты talking about?”
“Wait until you’re healed. Emotionally, I mean.”
She climbed off him, standing, her arms crossed over her chest, looking down at him. “I’m fine. And once we’re mortal and married I’ll be perfect.”
He sighed and stood as well, though she simply turned her head up to see his face. “You may think you’re fine now, but what happens when we’re human again? When we feel all the human emotions again? Показать them again?”
She looked at him, her eyes narrowed in dangerous slits that made him back away. “I know what I want. Grieve? Been there, done that. The only time I needed to grieve was when I Остаться в живых you-and that hadn’t stopped until I saw Ты again. Yes, part of me hurts for what I’ve Остаться в живых and despite the years Emmett…” Her sentence was cut short but a loud snarl from Jack. She looked at him, a bemused and slightly unnerved smile on her lips. “And I had, it paled in comparison to what we had, no matter how brief it may have been. I’ll take whatever pain comes but you’re worth it.”
He rolled his eyes at her bravado, wanting nothing еще than to grab her and shake her, hoping it would jar her out of this place she was in. “I Любовь you, Rosalie Lillian Hale and because I do, I’m going to promise the following to you: marry you, father your children, protect you, Любовь you, cherish you, but I still think Ты need to grieve first.”
She scowled at him. “Did Ты hear anything I said?”
“Yes. Did Ты hear anything I said?”
“Yes.”
“Isn’t that what Ты want?”
“Yes-with Ты and еще than anything.”
“Fine. Then do as I ask and I will be your slave.”
She stepped closer to him, her eyes wider now and somehow even еще dangerous. “You want me to grieve? To get over my loss?”
“Yes, еще than anything” he practically whispered.
She smirked and kissed him gently, pulling him on the couch, so he was over her. He instantly stopped, making her sigh. “You’re impossible.”
“No Rose Ты are. I tell Ты to grieve and Ты seduce me?”
She shrugged and he just looked at her. “I’m sorry” she finally said, looking at him. He looked at her and sighed, his head falling to his chest. “What?”
“When did everything get so damn complicated? Remember when we were younger and everything was so much simpler. Well, simpler than it is now.”
She nodded her head wistfully saying “yes, I know what Ты mean. It was a far easier time than where we stand now.”
“It wasn’t just the time; it was the way we were around each other. Well, once but…”
“Jack, I know I will feel pain for what I have Остаться в живых but I will be ok. I can’t wait to marry you, can’t wait to have our first child growing inside me. I know this is right. Ты do too. Maybe Ты can’t see it but the only time I feel безопасно, сейф and complete is when I’m with you. Being with Ты feels good. Home”
He looked at her, his body was reacting in a strange way to the way she had сказал(-а) our child…It wasn’t necessarily a bad feeling but it was definitely different. And he liked it. He cocked his head, looking at her still. “First child?”
She smiled. “Did Ты really think I wanted to stop at one?”
He took a breath and sighed though once again from euphoria, not pain. Not even in his wildest dreams-and they got beyond wild at many points-had he thought that this conversation would happen, that Rosalie would be so close that he could touch her. She looked at him, again worried. “I’m fine…Just can’t believe this is real.”
“I know. Surreal.”
He chuckled and gently kissed her, pressing her body closer to his. “Now who’s seducing who?”
He laughed again. “Oh this isn’t seducing.” She smiled and kissed him once еще before she lay back on him, her head going right back to its original position. She felt his body relax, one arm weaving through her hair, the other holding her hand tightly. Yes, this was home.
“Rose?”
“What?”
“Let’s just start with one and maybe work our way up.”
She laughed. “You say that now.”
He kissed the вверх of her hair and she closed her eyes. “Never leave me” she whispered.
“Never ever.” He sealed the promise with a deep, passionate Kiss that made time stand still and the Ангелы in heaven looked down and cheered.
i dindnt say anything for a minute,then i spoke.
'do Ты know why?"
'well,she сказал(-а) something about an old friend in texas." izzy told me.
"you dont think.."
"maybe.where else could she have gone?"
"come by my house after school,i have plan."
After school,izzy came over.We went to my room.
"what are we gonna do?"izzy asked,as soon as she walked in the room.
"wee gonig to find aslee" i siad,trying to sound as serious as possible.
"youre kidding,right? i mean,where are we gonna go?"izzy said.
"texas"
she stared at me.Blankly.Not saying a thing.As if she was gonna drop dead.
"izzy?"i asked,trying to get her back to reality.
"you must be on drugs," she said
"what?"
"youve got to be joking me.i mean,your mom is not gonig to take us,my mom is dead,and theres no way ere gonna..wait...your not saying?
"yep,wee going to texas"
'do Ты know why?"
'well,she сказал(-а) something about an old friend in texas." izzy told me.
"you dont think.."
"maybe.where else could she have gone?"
"come by my house after school,i have plan."
After school,izzy came over.We went to my room.
"what are we gonna do?"izzy asked,as soon as she walked in the room.
"wee gonig to find aslee" i siad,trying to sound as serious as possible.
"youre kidding,right? i mean,where are we gonna go?"izzy said.
"texas"
she stared at me.Blankly.Not saying a thing.As if she was gonna drop dead.
"izzy?"i asked,trying to get her back to reality.
"you must be on drugs," she said
"what?"
"youve got to be joking me.i mean,your mom is not gonig to take us,my mom is dead,and theres no way ere gonna..wait...your not saying?
"yep,wee going to texas"
Sobriety is beyond a horizon for you,
One Ты won't be alive to even get to.
Your mind is set to be dead in 10
Years, my fears, my tears,
don't matter, your emotionless, here.
My bothersome phone calls,
"I'm just checking in"
"Yeah, I don't care"
I can't ever win.
My eyes are taped open,
horrific Обои replay,
and even when I close them,
they're imprinted in my mind,
they're there to stay.
Blackness engulfs me,
like a whirlpool of nothing,
Your arch nemesis,
Your pal,
Your meaningless suffering.
Why do Ты do this,
to yourself, and to me?
I don't get why Ты mess around,
just let yourself be!
One Ты won't be alive to even get to.
Your mind is set to be dead in 10
Years, my fears, my tears,
don't matter, your emotionless, here.
My bothersome phone calls,
"I'm just checking in"
"Yeah, I don't care"
I can't ever win.
My eyes are taped open,
horrific Обои replay,
and even when I close them,
they're imprinted in my mind,
they're there to stay.
Blackness engulfs me,
like a whirlpool of nothing,
Your arch nemesis,
Your pal,
Your meaningless suffering.
Why do Ты do this,
to yourself, and to me?
I don't get why Ты mess around,
just let yourself be!
I'm sat at home
In my cardboard box
I'm scared to death
So I cuddle my socks
I hear the key turn in the door
Fear swells inside of me
My hope plummets through the floor
I peep outside my little box
In time to see my daddy roar
I'm worried now, I realise
Because he's angry I notice now
That what I'm seeing with swollen eyes
I don't know when I don't know how
It may be the last thing I ever see
This may be the last of me
I see his boots come closer, so I shriek
My bruises hurt еще than ever
He picks me up, I feel so weak
He shakes me now and calls me worthless
I just want him to Любовь me
I just want him to know me
But the broken bottle is against my chest
And is thrust through my cotton vest
Into my heart, the pain is fire
I see myself as I float higher
Now my vision is rimmed with darkness
The end is near, I feel its presence
I just wish that I could tell him
I Любовь him, but his Любовь is dim
In my cardboard box
I'm scared to death
So I cuddle my socks
I hear the key turn in the door
Fear swells inside of me
My hope plummets through the floor
I peep outside my little box
In time to see my daddy roar
I'm worried now, I realise
Because he's angry I notice now
That what I'm seeing with swollen eyes
I don't know when I don't know how
It may be the last thing I ever see
This may be the last of me
I see his boots come closer, so I shriek
My bruises hurt еще than ever
He picks me up, I feel so weak
He shakes me now and calls me worthless
I just want him to Любовь me
I just want him to know me
But the broken bottle is against my chest
And is thrust through my cotton vest
Into my heart, the pain is fire
I see myself as I float higher
Now my vision is rimmed with darkness
The end is near, I feel its presence
I just wish that I could tell him
I Любовь him, but his Любовь is dim
He gives me sight,
Saves me from evil's bite,
Holds me when I cry,
Always by my side.
My last breath is taken and дана to him,
He saves me from the storm I'm in,
He saves me and calls me his,
Have him when I'm in a crisis.
Иисус is everything.
Everything to me,
Helping me see,
Stealing my heart,
Oh how I hate being apart.
Stand here and be moved by him,
To feel him in my veins,
To feel him inside of me.
My friend,
My helper,
The great shrink,
I am proud to be part of his link.
Blown away by his grace,
Blessed by his mercy,
Oh how he carries.
Holds every tear in his hand,
Wipes away our sorrows,
For a better tomorrow.