Running from Chicacolt to San Franciscolt is a railroad called the Union Pacific. It's the largest railroad in the United States, and is run by thousands of ponies. This is the story of some of those ponies that run the rails, aka railroading.
Episode 5: War pony
May 15, 1951
The korean war has been going on for months. Everypony on the Union Pacific was doing their best to deliver supplies to Las Pegasus for use in the U.S military.
Gordon: *doing yard work*
Pete: Gordon, I have something for Ты to do.
Gordon: Great! I'm doing a lot of that here.
Pete: I want Ты to go to Las Pegasus.
Gordon: Cool. What am I going to do?
Pete: Ты no longer have to work in the yards, but get to drive a train.
Gordon: Swee-- I don't have to work with Hawkeye, right?
Pete: Nope. Ты gotta work with.....
Gordon: (Please say Honey, please say Honey.)
Pete: Coffee Creme.
Gordon: (Shit) *smiles* Great. I'll get to work right away.
After his fake smile toward Pete, Gordon went to the servicing facility to get his engine for the train. He would be driving a 4-6-6-4 Challenger. A smaller version of the bigboy.
Jeff: Good morning Gordon.
Gordon: Where's Percy?
Jeff: He's fixing track. But don't Ты know not to switch jobs without permission from the boss?
Gordon: Aha, aha, that was nearly a год ago.
Jeff: Ты did get permission, right?
Gordon: Yeah! And I don't need your fat жопа, попка telling me what to do!
Jeff: Ты say that, but it doesn't mean it's true. You're the fattest worker here in the U.P.
Gordon: Wow, way to offend me loser. *drives engine*
Gordon then drove his engine onto another track, where he would couple his engine to the train. 75 cars were in the train, and it was all going to L.P.
Gordon: *stops engine*
Coffee Creme: A little closer.
Gordon: ugh *backs up*
Coffee Creme: Perfect. *goes to air brakes*
Gordon: Let's go! Hurry up.
Coffee Creme: *connecting air brakes*
Gordon: *blows whistle*
Meanwhile, up in the signalbox
Snowflake: Hmm, that train must be ready. *turns signal green*
Gordon: *accelerates*
Coffee Creme: WAit!! *finishes connecting air brakes*
Unfortunately Coffee Creme was standing on the couplers while the train was in motion.
Gordon: Let's make this сука go faster *accelerates to 35*
Coffee Creme: *climbing to вверх of tender*
Gordon: *sees Coffee Creme* What the fuck is she doing?
Coffee Creme: *runs toward cab*
Gordon: A red signal?! Ahhh, forget it. *drives faster*
Coffee Creme: Oh shit *nearly hits her head on signal, then gets in cab*
Gordon: Where the hell have Ты been?
Coffee Creme: At the back of the locomotive Ты careless nincompoop.
Gordon: Fuck you.
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel* Where's the coal?
Gordon: This engine uses oil, we don't have coal.
Coffee Creme: So, how does the oil get into the firebox?
Gordon: Automatically. All Ты have to do, is check our fuel, look out the other side of the window, and tell me something important. If it's not important, I'll ignore you.
Coffee Creme: Yeah, I'll let Ты know, and call the news reporters.
Gordon: So funny I forgot to laugh.
Coffee Creme: There's a train in our way.
Gordon: *slows down* I think we might crash.
Coffee Creme: Ты shouldn't have passed that red signal.
Gordon: That's not important *going 15*
Coffee Creme: We're going to hit it!
Gordon: *cover eyes*
Coffee Creme: *prepares to jump*
But before Coffee Creme jumped, Gordon's train stopped. It was literally half of a centimeter close to the other train.
Coffee Creme: What happened?
Gordon: I don't know, but it's completely unacceptable. Stay here, I'll be back.
Coffee Creme: I wanna go with you.
Gordon: Stay here!! I'll be back!
Coffee Creme: *sits in chair*
Gordon; *walks to other engine* It's so hot. *turns around*
Coffee Creme: *waiting*
Gordon: *comes back* Fuck it, Ты go find out what's happening.
Coffee Creme: Me?
Gordon: No, Harry Trumare. Yes you, go!
Coffee Creme: *climbs out of cab*
Gordon: *grabs shovel* Take this with Ты *throws it at Coffee Creme*
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel*
Shortly after that, the train in front of Gordon started to move. Once it did, Percy drove up to them in a truck.
Coffee Creme: Hi Percy.
Percy: What's up Coffee? I just wanted Ты to know there was a derailment because of the track's condition. You'll have to wait for me to fix it, and then Ты can go.
Gordon: What did he say?
Coffee Creme: We have to wait for the tracks to be fixed.
Gordon: Nope. There has to be another way to get to Las Pegasus.
Percy: There isn't unless Ты want to travel backwards for twenty miles.
Gordon: It'll be quicker than waiting for Ты to fix the tracks. Get in Coffee Creme.
Coffee Creme: *gets in cab*
Gordon: *driving backwards*
Coffee Creme: How are we going to see which way we're going?
Gordon: When a train crashes into us, then we'll know.
Coffee Creme: Great.
Gordon: Oh, shut up. Ты got a better idea?
Coffee Creme: Oui. We put the engine on the other side, and we know which way we're going.
Gordon: Nope. That takes too long.
Eventually they were going 70 miles an hour. They would reach the alternate route in no еще than 15 minutes.
Coffee Creme: I'm surprised we haven't crashed yet.
Gordon: We're not going to.
Coffee Creme: I think we should just go forward. The tracks are probably fixed now.
Gordon: No, they're not. As a matter of fact, we had to wait for them to fix the track.
Coffee Creme: Still, could be worse.
Suddenly, the sound of a crashing train could be heard. Orion crashed into the back of Gordon's train.
(Everybody, say it with me)
Luckily, no one was hurt.
Except for the millions of passengers that probably just died on Orion's passenger train. Luckily, no one important was hurt.
Gordon ran surprisingly fast to the end of the train, and was getting prepared to use a spell that would get the derailed cars back onto the tracks.
Gordon: *panting* I have to make it. *nearly trips* I'm so close to the end. *lays on ground*
Gordon stopped, after only moving an inch, running alongside a train that was one mile long.
Coffee Creme: *teleports to end of train*
Gordon: No, no, no! Don't tell Orion anything!! *runs again* Damnit, I'm getting tired. *falls on ground*
Orion: He can't run for shit.
Coffee Creme: Really? Whatever, let's just get our trains back on the tracks, and repair the engines.
Orion: How are we going to do that?
Coffee Creme: *shows horn*
Orion: Oh yeah. Well, I'm a pegasus, so I can't do anything.
Coffee Creme: Ты don't have to. Just keep your mouth shut about this.
Gordon: *shows up* Don't tell him anything!!
Coffee Creme: Did Ты hear what I said? I told him to keep his mouth shut.
Gordon: Oh, yeah. I remeber now.
Orion: It's pronounced, re mem ber.
Gordon: Whatever *repairs engine*
Coffee Creme: *repairs freight cars*
Gordon: Ok. Now to check your rolling stock.
Coffee Creme: His passenger cars seem fine.
Gordon: It's called rolling stock.
Orion: Not always. Well, Ты two did a great job. Better hurry, before we get late.
Gordon: Yeah, you're right. *teleports to engine*
Coffee Creme: *teleports to engine* So, have Ты learned from your mistakes?
Gordon: What's a mistake?
Coffee Creme: (Why do I even try being nice to him?)
Gordon: *drives train* It was Orion who hit us. He saw us after all, why didn't he stop?
Coffee Creme: Whatever Ты say.
150 минуты later, Gordon got the war equipment to Las Pegasus.
Sargent: About time. What the fuck took Ты guys so long?
Gordon: A bunch of idiots got in our way, and derailed our train.
Sargent: None of this stuff better be damaged.
Gordon: It's not, but if it was, I'd fix it.
Sargent: *sees damaged jeeps* Would Ты now?
And so, Gordon spent two hours helping the military repair jeeps. Then he went back to Cheyenne.
Pete: Well, I heard of an epic screw up Ты caused with Orion's passenger train today.
Gordon: (Fuck!)
Pete: But I heard Ты did a very good job fixing the damage caused by the train wreck.
Gordon: (Say what?) Thanks.
Pete: As a reward, I'm giving Ты the entire week off.
Gordon: Thank Ты sir.
Pete: Starting now.
Gordon: Yahoo! *runs away* I'm going to a пляж, пляжный alongside Neigh Jersey. See Ты ponies in one week!!
The end
On the Далее episode of Ponies On The Rails
Percy, and Jeff get some of the spotlight. In other words, they're getting their own episode
Copyright, 2013
Episode 5: War pony
May 15, 1951
The korean war has been going on for months. Everypony on the Union Pacific was doing their best to deliver supplies to Las Pegasus for use in the U.S military.
Gordon: *doing yard work*
Pete: Gordon, I have something for Ты to do.
Gordon: Great! I'm doing a lot of that here.
Pete: I want Ты to go to Las Pegasus.
Gordon: Cool. What am I going to do?
Pete: Ты no longer have to work in the yards, but get to drive a train.
Gordon: Swee-- I don't have to work with Hawkeye, right?
Pete: Nope. Ты gotta work with.....
Gordon: (Please say Honey, please say Honey.)
Pete: Coffee Creme.
Gordon: (Shit) *smiles* Great. I'll get to work right away.
After his fake smile toward Pete, Gordon went to the servicing facility to get his engine for the train. He would be driving a 4-6-6-4 Challenger. A smaller version of the bigboy.
Jeff: Good morning Gordon.
Gordon: Where's Percy?
Jeff: He's fixing track. But don't Ты know not to switch jobs without permission from the boss?
Gordon: Aha, aha, that was nearly a год ago.
Jeff: Ты did get permission, right?
Gordon: Yeah! And I don't need your fat жопа, попка telling me what to do!
Jeff: Ты say that, but it doesn't mean it's true. You're the fattest worker here in the U.P.
Gordon: Wow, way to offend me loser. *drives engine*
Gordon then drove his engine onto another track, where he would couple his engine to the train. 75 cars were in the train, and it was all going to L.P.
Gordon: *stops engine*
Coffee Creme: A little closer.
Gordon: ugh *backs up*
Coffee Creme: Perfect. *goes to air brakes*
Gordon: Let's go! Hurry up.
Coffee Creme: *connecting air brakes*
Gordon: *blows whistle*
Meanwhile, up in the signalbox
Snowflake: Hmm, that train must be ready. *turns signal green*
Gordon: *accelerates*
Coffee Creme: WAit!! *finishes connecting air brakes*
Unfortunately Coffee Creme was standing on the couplers while the train was in motion.
Gordon: Let's make this сука go faster *accelerates to 35*
Coffee Creme: *climbing to вверх of tender*
Gordon: *sees Coffee Creme* What the fuck is she doing?
Coffee Creme: *runs toward cab*
Gordon: A red signal?! Ahhh, forget it. *drives faster*
Coffee Creme: Oh shit *nearly hits her head on signal, then gets in cab*
Gordon: Where the hell have Ты been?
Coffee Creme: At the back of the locomotive Ты careless nincompoop.
Gordon: Fuck you.
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel* Where's the coal?
Gordon: This engine uses oil, we don't have coal.
Coffee Creme: So, how does the oil get into the firebox?
Gordon: Automatically. All Ты have to do, is check our fuel, look out the other side of the window, and tell me something important. If it's not important, I'll ignore you.
Coffee Creme: Yeah, I'll let Ты know, and call the news reporters.
Gordon: So funny I forgot to laugh.
Coffee Creme: There's a train in our way.
Gordon: *slows down* I think we might crash.
Coffee Creme: Ты shouldn't have passed that red signal.
Gordon: That's not important *going 15*
Coffee Creme: We're going to hit it!
Gordon: *cover eyes*
Coffee Creme: *prepares to jump*
But before Coffee Creme jumped, Gordon's train stopped. It was literally half of a centimeter close to the other train.
Coffee Creme: What happened?
Gordon: I don't know, but it's completely unacceptable. Stay here, I'll be back.
Coffee Creme: I wanna go with you.
Gordon: Stay here!! I'll be back!
Coffee Creme: *sits in chair*
Gordon; *walks to other engine* It's so hot. *turns around*
Coffee Creme: *waiting*
Gordon: *comes back* Fuck it, Ты go find out what's happening.
Coffee Creme: Me?
Gordon: No, Harry Trumare. Yes you, go!
Coffee Creme: *climbs out of cab*
Gordon: *grabs shovel* Take this with Ты *throws it at Coffee Creme*
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel*
Shortly after that, the train in front of Gordon started to move. Once it did, Percy drove up to them in a truck.
Coffee Creme: Hi Percy.
Percy: What's up Coffee? I just wanted Ты to know there was a derailment because of the track's condition. You'll have to wait for me to fix it, and then Ты can go.
Gordon: What did he say?
Coffee Creme: We have to wait for the tracks to be fixed.
Gordon: Nope. There has to be another way to get to Las Pegasus.
Percy: There isn't unless Ты want to travel backwards for twenty miles.
Gordon: It'll be quicker than waiting for Ты to fix the tracks. Get in Coffee Creme.
Coffee Creme: *gets in cab*
Gordon: *driving backwards*
Coffee Creme: How are we going to see which way we're going?
Gordon: When a train crashes into us, then we'll know.
Coffee Creme: Great.
Gordon: Oh, shut up. Ты got a better idea?
Coffee Creme: Oui. We put the engine on the other side, and we know which way we're going.
Gordon: Nope. That takes too long.
Eventually they were going 70 miles an hour. They would reach the alternate route in no еще than 15 minutes.
Coffee Creme: I'm surprised we haven't crashed yet.
Gordon: We're not going to.
Coffee Creme: I think we should just go forward. The tracks are probably fixed now.
Gordon: No, they're not. As a matter of fact, we had to wait for them to fix the track.
Coffee Creme: Still, could be worse.
Suddenly, the sound of a crashing train could be heard. Orion crashed into the back of Gordon's train.
(Everybody, say it with me)
Luckily, no one was hurt.
Except for the millions of passengers that probably just died on Orion's passenger train. Luckily, no one important was hurt.
Gordon ran surprisingly fast to the end of the train, and was getting prepared to use a spell that would get the derailed cars back onto the tracks.
Gordon: *panting* I have to make it. *nearly trips* I'm so close to the end. *lays on ground*
Gordon stopped, after only moving an inch, running alongside a train that was one mile long.
Coffee Creme: *teleports to end of train*
Gordon: No, no, no! Don't tell Orion anything!! *runs again* Damnit, I'm getting tired. *falls on ground*
Orion: He can't run for shit.
Coffee Creme: Really? Whatever, let's just get our trains back on the tracks, and repair the engines.
Orion: How are we going to do that?
Coffee Creme: *shows horn*
Orion: Oh yeah. Well, I'm a pegasus, so I can't do anything.
Coffee Creme: Ты don't have to. Just keep your mouth shut about this.
Gordon: *shows up* Don't tell him anything!!
Coffee Creme: Did Ты hear what I said? I told him to keep his mouth shut.
Gordon: Oh, yeah. I remeber now.
Orion: It's pronounced, re mem ber.
Gordon: Whatever *repairs engine*
Coffee Creme: *repairs freight cars*
Gordon: Ok. Now to check your rolling stock.
Coffee Creme: His passenger cars seem fine.
Gordon: It's called rolling stock.
Orion: Not always. Well, Ты two did a great job. Better hurry, before we get late.
Gordon: Yeah, you're right. *teleports to engine*
Coffee Creme: *teleports to engine* So, have Ты learned from your mistakes?
Gordon: What's a mistake?
Coffee Creme: (Why do I even try being nice to him?)
Gordon: *drives train* It was Orion who hit us. He saw us after all, why didn't he stop?
Coffee Creme: Whatever Ты say.
150 минуты later, Gordon got the war equipment to Las Pegasus.
Sargent: About time. What the fuck took Ты guys so long?
Gordon: A bunch of idiots got in our way, and derailed our train.
Sargent: None of this stuff better be damaged.
Gordon: It's not, but if it was, I'd fix it.
Sargent: *sees damaged jeeps* Would Ты now?
And so, Gordon spent two hours helping the military repair jeeps. Then he went back to Cheyenne.
Pete: Well, I heard of an epic screw up Ты caused with Orion's passenger train today.
Gordon: (Fuck!)
Pete: But I heard Ты did a very good job fixing the damage caused by the train wreck.
Gordon: (Say what?) Thanks.
Pete: As a reward, I'm giving Ты the entire week off.
Gordon: Thank Ты sir.
Pete: Starting now.
Gordon: Yahoo! *runs away* I'm going to a пляж, пляжный alongside Neigh Jersey. See Ты ponies in one week!!
The end
On the Далее episode of Ponies On The Rails
Percy, and Jeff get some of the spotlight. In other words, they're getting their own episode
Copyright, 2013
Robotnik: Pingas!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.
A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy Показать that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.
Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank Ты everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank Ты very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.
The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.
Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help Ты officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. Ты know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Song: link
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958
Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
