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just got this while browsing the net

1.I was kidnapped by terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.

2.I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.

3.A bunch of nerds украл, палантин it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.

4.We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.

5.My mother took it to have it framed.

6.It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket украл, палантин it.

7.I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.

8.My mom's whooping cough vaccination wore off and we had to go to the hospital.

9.My skimpy printer ran out of ink.

10.I wasn't able to do my homework this weekend because when I went ice fishing, the heater inside of the tent got too close to the Стена of the tent, starting it on fire. And when I ran out of there, I realized that my cat was still in there. My cat was in there because all the small рыба that I catch, I just give to my cat. But when I went back for my cat, the огонь was too hot. So I spent the weekend morning the loss of my cat.

11."You сказал(-а) do Вопросы 1-10. Ты didn't say bring them in."

12.My youngest daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her younger step-brother had stolen it, filled it in and turned it in to his teacher to prove how smart he was.

13.My house is being fumigated and I don't want to go in there and suffocate just to get it.

14.I left it in my рубашка and my mother put the рубашка in the wash.

15.I didn't do it because I spent all night doing the Назад night's homework.

16.My Dad accidentally put it in his портфель and took it to work.

17.My flash drive exploded.

18.The cleaning lady threw it away.

19.I felt like doing the whole book on the bus ride home, so I did -- but after the first 116 pages, I got bus-sick and puked all over the workbook and all my homework! What a coincidence, eh? So I started an extra credit Сообщить about World War I & II in my car going back Главная after ужин and, lo and behold!, my clumsy little siblings all felt carsick and hurled all over it and the World War библиотека book (that'll explain the School библиотека fine). And it was already too late to start another one, so my mom wrote me a note excusing me for not bringing in my homework. I was looking at it on the bus when Billy (or whoever), who was sitting Далее to me, felt really sick and guess what happened?

20.I put it in the safe, but Остаться в живых the combination.

21.My child’s locker is jammed and she can't get her homework out of it.

22.Some aliens from outer Космос borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked.

23.Had to bail mom out of jail again.

24.A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again.

25.I have the mathematical proof, but there isn't room to write it in the margin.

26.The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.

27.I was in the lunch room and another student started criticizing Ты and I just couldn't let that go without letting him know he was wrong. I searched through my backpack to find something to throw at him, and all I could find was today's homework assignment, so I let him have it.

28.I thought the assignment was uninspiring. I read Moby Dick instead.

29.I got soap in my eyes and was blinded for the rest of the night.

30.Please excuse Jackie for not having her homework she was a little under the weatherman, and there was a big flurry in Central America.

31.I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.It wasn't challenging enough.

32.Our dog has mistaken Reid’s homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper.

33.I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.

34.I gave it to a homeless man to line his hat with.

35.My daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her dad had used it to start a огонь in the wood stove.

36.A man came into my house last night and threatened to commit suicide. Well, it turns out he had a split-personality, so it was considered a hostage situation. It was a big commotion. Police, ambulance, everything! I can't believe Ты didn't hear about it! That's why I couldn't get my homework done.

37.A mad circus clown украл, палантин it on my bus stop and tried luring me into his house with it.

38.Aliens from outer Космос abducted my homework. They threatened me and сказал(-а) that if I didn’t give them my homework that I would be terminated.

39."Sharon didn't do her homework because of her eyes.....She couldn't see any reason to do it."

40.My internet access was down (for emailed assignments).

41.I did my homework in my head, I didn’t know I was supposed to write it down. Then I forgot. Далее time should I Показать my work?

42.I left it at Mom's house when she took me back to Dad's house.

43.I did do it all, but before I got a chance to save, my book crashed and I Остаться в живых it all.

44.I loaned it to a friend, but he moved away.

45.I left it in my locker with last week's assignment.

46."I left it on your стол письменный, стол last Friday but its just not here and it was handwritten so I can't print it off again, took me ages!"

47.I left it in a hymn book in the choir loft, having used it to mark my solo.

48.I gave it to the substitute.

49.My printer broke and my disk is corrupted. Unfortunately my computer crashed this morning as well.

50.I left my homework on my стол письменный, стол at home. My dog got ahold of it and slobbered all over it. I didn’t want to bring it in with all those dog germs.

51.I dropped it in the toilet accidentally and it got flushed.

52.I have radon poisoning.

53.My notebook got stolen in the school cafeteria and it had all my work in it.

54.There's a virus in my printer.

55."Joe don't have his homework because our family just got a new paper shredder, and I just had to test it out, and I accidentally shredded Joe’s homework."

56.My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls.

57.Another student fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drowned.

58.We had no Еда in the house. I can’t do homework on an empty stomach. Can you?

59.I left it in the back of the truck when we went deer hunting. One of the textbook's word problems offended me. I'm not supporting them by doing any еще of their problems.

60.Please excuse my son for doing so poorly on the test. The час he puts aside to do homework and studying every week was Остаться в живых when the clocks "sprung forward" over the weekend.

61.I was at a rally last night.
added by cici1264
Source: The rock dressed as miley cyrus
They both had nose jobs.
They both over-obsess about a certain guy.
They both loosed weight over their teenage years purposely.
They both hate everybody.
They both have thier "posse."
They both had a facial implant.
They both thier parents and wish they were borne somebody else.
They both have issues with their body.
They both wear makeup. (Voldemort likes the goth, angered soul type. It Форс-мажоры him better.)
They both can't trust anyone, but themselves.
And that's it:)
Role Play:
Voldemort: "What?! What is this filthy mudblood saying about me?"
Deatheater: "Well Lord it seems that she is calling Ты an...
continue reading...
posted by invadercalliope

Just killing time until the world ends.
Rika Furude (Higurashi no Naku Koro ni)

◦Friends are nothing еще than the the people who Ты spend the fun yet meaningless times with. When those times get rough, they aren't there to support you.
Ryuuguu Rena (Higurashi no Naku Koro ni)
"I will live past June 1983, and then I am going to grow much taller, my breasts are going to get bigger. I'm not going to stay in a child's body for the rest of my life!"
"It's so cute, I want to take it home!"

"Omochiikaeri~!"

"Friends. Those companions Ты speak of are only Друзья during those fun, yet unimportant...
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added by fanfly
Source: wallpaperswide.com
Jetzt geht's los Freunde
Hier ist Markus Becker und die Mallorca Cowboys und das rote Pferd

Wir singen zusammen
Da hat das rote Pferd sich einfach umgekehrt
und hat mit seinem Schwanz die Fliege abgewehrt
Die Fliege war nicht dumm,
sie machte summ,summ,summ
Und flog mit viel Gebrumm
um's rote Pferd herum

lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala

Ok Freunde,
das war nicht schlecht für логово, ден Anfang
Aber da geht noch was
Seit ihr gut drauf? Jaaa
Habt ihr lust zu feiern? Jaaa
Dann macht euch bereit und singt mit uns zusammen


Die Fliege...
continue reading...
added by RoohWinchester
Source: Google
[Everybody Loves Raymond] 116 - Diamonds #385
Marie: Oh I used to Любовь Valentines Day!... then I met your father.
Frank: I used to Любовь every day.
Contributed by funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 121 - Fascinating Debra #409
Debra: There's nothing funny about me to imitate y'know?
Ray: Oh, what are Ты talking about? Here I'll do you. "Ray, get off of me, it's not your birthday"
Contributed by funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond] 202 - Father Knows Least #380
Ray: Look, Ты have to do what Mommy says.
Ally: Why?
Ray: 'Cause I do.
Contributed by funnytvquotes.com



[Everybody Loves Raymond]...
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How is it going, everyone. Welcome back to Watching Outside Your Xbox Window While Ты Rant at Night. I’m your host, TatsMojo, and today, we’ll be taking a look at the strangest video games that Ты have never heard of. Number 10: Katamari Damacy. This strange little gem was made on the weird side of the world, Japan. You’ve probably never heard of this (What the fuck am I doing?)
In all seriousness, when I hear about these weird games and the whole, “What were these developers doing? Snorting LSD and drinking PSP and doing funny weed?” is a mindset that just screams that Ты really...
continue reading...
Saturday Night Live skit where Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson invents a child molesting robot. I didn't know about this until today.
video
posted by Seanthehedgehog

 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link

Naboo, six months before the events of The Empire Strikes Back.

Human 49: Attention Naboo. Ceci est un message important. La rébellion prévoit une invasion. Ils nous aideront à sortir l'empire de notre planète. (Attention Naboo. This is an important message. The Rebellion is planning an invasion. They will help us push the empire out of our planet.)

Meanwhile, far from Yavin 4, hundreds of Mon Calamari Starships were travelling with blockade runners, Rebel Transports, U-Wings, Y-Wings,...
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added by MorG14
Source: DEEcat98
SAW TORTURE

In this method, the victim is hung upside down, so that the blood will rush to their heads and keep them conscious during the long torture. The torturer would then saw through the victims’ bodies until they were completely sawed in half. Most were cut up only in their abdomen to prolong their agony.

WOODEN HORSE/SPANISH DONKEY

One of the torture devices during the Spanish Inquisition and medieval ages, this is probably one of the most gruesome of them all. The victim is put astride, naked, on a donkey-like apparatus, which is actually a vertical wooden board with a sharp V-wedge...
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Got inspired by 324anna's Статья :)







10. Emily Ratajkowski
I thought she looked odd when I first saw the clip of Blurred Lines. Looked again and completely changed my mind! She does have exotic features but she doesn't look strange to me anymore, just stunning.


9. Olivia Munn
She's very unique looking, she can pull off pretty much anything. I Любовь her freckles and her hazel eyes, it meshes well with her оливковый, оливковое skin and her dark hair.


8. J-Lo
It's gotta be a sin to look this good in your 40s. She's famous for her assets but damn, there's so much еще to her beauty, this woman is mad beautiful....
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A быстрый, стремительный, свифт lunge at your soul but it's all in the mind
If Ты want to stuff me in a suit I'm sure you'll find
That the things that'll creep ya are sure to beat ya
Got to stay alive или they're going to meet ya

10 Rooms 5 vents and no doors at all
Not even a flashlight and no time to stall
Delay for a moment and through the vents they'll crawl
Almost dead, every sound I dread, and I see him in the hall.

YOYOYOYO WHAT'S UP BRO!?
YOU'RE THE NEW GUY, HIGH FIVE, TOO SLOW!
JUST LIVE FIVE NIGHTS, EACH ONE'S DIFFICULTY'S GREATER
YOU GOT THE BASICS DUDE, ALRIGHT SEE Ты LATER!

So night one, here we go,...
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posted by BlondLionEzel
pproaching Shocker, the infernal army.
The black shadow aims for us,
Protecting the peace of the world.
Go! (x2) Let's Go! The Shining Machine
Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Masked Rider (x2)
Rider (x2)

Approaching Shocker, the demonic army.
The black shadow aims for our friends,
Protecting the peace of the world.
Go! (x2) Let's Go! The Crimson Muffler
Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Masked Rider (x2)
Rider (x2)

Approaching Shocker, the terrifying army.
The black shadow aims for our town,
Protecting the peace of the world.
Go! (x2) Let's Go! The Green-colored Helmet
Rider Jump! Rider Kick!
Masked Rider (x2)
Rider (x2)
added by tanyya
added by jordanyeaboi
added by check-it-out13