(THIS Статья IS A JOKE. CALM DOWN MATES. ENJOY :D)

*Cough* I WANNA HANG MYSELF

SO how's it goin' Internet, everyone getting along? It's good to be Главная again. :)

Typical Internet Douche: WHO U CALLIN' A WINY BICH U BICH >:(

I was right.....I AM home. :P

So I'm pretty sure that it's common fucking sense at this point that a hilariously large minority of the internet seem to either be five years old, have never gone to school, или are just mindless retarded sadists who jack off to others pain using grammar worse than that of a goddamn cheese grater.

And today, I'm going to be one of those sadists. To experience what's it like to be on-

♫THE OTHER SIIIIIIDE~♫

(........You know that one line was like, three song references right there. Try to find them all. ;D)

And now.......Without further ado, I'm going to tell Ты worthless bastards why your opinion is wrong.

Also, although I don't have any evidence as to why you'd be worthless...........I don't know, just take my word for it.

So first off, Ты have to realize something. This ain't the city of Townsville или some shit like that, this is the INTERNET. We're going to молоко your goddamn justifications like no tomorrow as is, so unless Ты finally found the fuckin' Da Vinci Code, then keep your god-forsaken trap shut.

Although we can't really make Ты do that.....So uh, just listen to us, I suppose. I'm sure it'll work. I mean, why WOULDN'T Ты listen to someone who has no power over who Ты are and couldn't get your address if they spent their fucking life trying to?

.......You know I can't help but see a flaw in this plan.

Another thing worth noting is that everybody who HAS expressed their half-assed opinions on the internet have NEVER ended up successful. I mean, seriously, just look at these unpopular fucktards!





Pfft, a few million loyal subscribers? What the hell is that to the world? I bet Donald Trump has еще attention than these scrub-lords. Hell, even HITLER had еще subscribers than these two!

....However the hell that works.

Oh, and don't even get me STARTED on how much your opinion will offend the SHIT out of everyone on the Internet. Why Ты may ask?

I...Can't really answer that, people are just people, I guess.

And people are absolutely delusional.

Ты know, at first this Статья was going to be me Актёрское искусство like an immature fuckwad in the mind of your typical internet douchebag, but I can't take this anymore.

Like, seriously! The amount of logic that these brain-dead nimrods have is really starting to make me Вопрос my life decisions, like, WHEN did humanity drop SO fucking low?

WHEN THE HELL did EVERYBODY on Earth become a curse-word loving prick who lives to offend others? And I know I should be talking, but for god's sake, this is just a joke.

I curse for the sake of imitating the morons who Любовь to use them out of hatred. (And the fact that at this point, it's kind of just who I am.)

See, I could go into all this for hours talking about how cursing is only really wrong when you're actually MAD, and how the Internet seems to be еще toxic than a fucking abandoned radiation power-plant, but for the sake of time, I shall conclude with a wise quote that I just made up today.

"Anger is like a wrecking ball. It builds nothing, but can destroy everything."

Oh, and for those wondering why this Статья went semi-serious-telling-me-what-I-already-fucking-know-and-have-decided-to-live-with, I'm just getting this out there for the new generation before it's too late.

Because if it weren't for the better people out there, then the country would be еще done for than the Novaya Zemlya archipelago was in 1961.

....I'll leave now.