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Source: Saxton Freeman
posted by Invincible321
I got this idea from Wanda5.

Rules:
- Put your MP3 player/iPod/iTunes on shuffle.
- Post the first line from the first 30 songs that plays, no matter how embarrassing the song.
- Let anyone guess the Ответы (song Название and artist) and bold the line when someone guesses correctly.

1. Do Ты ever feel like a plastic bag... Firework-Katy Perry
2. In the night, I hear 'em talk... Heartless-Dia Frampton
3. Baby, be mine 'cause even God knows... Scream-Hedley
4. All this talkin' to you, I don't know what I'm to do... Stop Standing There-Avril Lavigne
5. When Ты walk, Ты don't leave tracks... Kiss &...
continue reading...
Man: If I could see Ты naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw Ты naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: Haven't I seen Ты someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this сиденье, место, сиденья empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if Ты sit down.

Man: Your place или mine?
Woman: Both. Ты go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do Ты do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Эй, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do Ты like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would Ты stay there?

Man: Why aren't Ты married yet?
Woman: What? And spoil my great sex life?

Man: Why aren't Ты married yet?
Woman:Why aren't Ты thin?

Man: Why aren't Ты married yet?
Woman: Because having a husband and a child would be redundant.
posted by twilightgirl2
A fwd I got:

The teacher told Pepito to make sentences with his spelling words
1.cheese=Maria likes me but cheese fat
2.mushroom=wen all my Друзья get in the car, there isn't mushroom
3.shoulder=my friend didn't know how to make a тако so I shoulder
4.texas=my friend always texas me fwds
5.herpes=me and my friend shared a piza, I got my piece and she got herpes
6.july=ju told me ju were going to the store and july to me! !! Julyer!!!!!
7.rectum=I had two cars, but my wife rectum
8.chicken=I was going to tje store with my wife but chicken go by herself
9.wheelchair=we only have one soda but ita ok wheelchair
10.chicken wing=my mom plays the lottery so chicken wing
11.liver=a bully was messing wit my sister and I told him to liver alone
12.bodywash=I wanted to go to the bar but no bodywash my kids
13.budweiser=that woman over there has a nice body, budweiser her face so ugly
posted by musicfanaticXD
1. When Ты get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?"

2. When he asks why Ты were speeding, tell him Ты wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend Ты are deaf.

4. If he asks if Ты knew how fast Ты were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......

5. Ask if Ты can see his gun.

6. When he says Ты aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why Ты were speeding, tell him Ты had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him by his first name.

11. Pretend Ты are gay and ask...
continue reading...
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Bla bla bla, clearly I`m on a mega huge k-pop and HU wave lately
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