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User: I'll do it when I'm pregnant.


Cleverbot: Are Ты really typing now или is it all computerised.


User: Well come on man, you're a small guy. What size shoe do Ты wear? I wear a size 13. Ты look like a 9 или ... What, like an 8?


Cleverbot: And you're a guy! You've got tiny feet!


User: You're exactly right. I'm just sayin', you're right.


Cleverbot: Do Ты think all these Вопросы are coming from 1 person?

User: Ты keep doing that and I'm gonna drop this kid right here.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, you're just not as smart as Ты used to be.

User: They say that this should be served at room temperature, but it's best cold: Revenge.

Cleverbot: Not quite alive?! Ты are a machine. Why can't Ты accept this?
LOL
added by jessy_an
added by missracoon
added by Sen_Kagemiya
added by ember96
added by chelo_monster
added by azkaban
added by Kiniko90
Source: tumblr
added by KatiiCullen94
added by Manicliker123
MARY HAD A LITLE LMB LITLE LMB LITLE LMB MARY HAD A LITL3 LMB WHOSE FLECE WAS WHIET AS SNOW
SNG1!!1!11 WTF A SONG OF SIXPENC3 A POK3T FUL OF RY3!1!! OMG LOL FOUR AND TWENTY BLAKBIRDS BAEKD IN A PEI1!!!11 OMG WTF LOL WHAN TEH PEI WAS OP3NED DA BIRDS BGAON 2 SNG1!1!11 LOL WASNT TAHT A DANETY DISH 2 SET BFORA DA KNG
TWINKLE???!???? LOL TWINKLA LITL3 STAR1!!!!1 WTF LOL HOW I WONDAR WUT U AER1!!11! OMG UP ABOV3 TEH WORLD SO HIGH1!!1 WTF LOL LIEK A DIMOND IN DA SKY1!11 TWINKL3 TWINKLE LITLA STAR!!11 OMG HOW I WONDER WUT U AER111!




i could barely read this and again this is from the internet<33
posted by EllentheStrange
Feel free to use them
1.Your mom
2.Dick
3.Eat it bitch
4.That's what she said
5. The future is bulletproof and the aftermath is secondary
6.Forshizz
7.Holy cannibal cupcake!
8.IDEK
9.Hey ho,let's go!
10.In Soviet Russia,the медведь wrestles you
11.Chuck Norris was here
12.Apple cake
13.Bloody bastards!
14.Ya know,I was welcomed to the black parade
15.Take my fucking hand and suck my thumb
16.Eat the children raw
17.RAWR means I Любовь Ты in Italian
18.I will carry on with the black parade
19.So long and goodnight
20.Ya know,I live life on the murder scene
Things Guys Should Know About Girls

1. Don’t ever lie to us; we always find out.
2. We don’t enjoy talking dirty to Ты as much as you
enjoy listening.
3. Don’t say Ты understand when Ты don’t.
4. Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!
5. Ты don’t have PMS; don’t act like Ты know what it’s
like.
6. Saying something sweet might get Ты off the hook;
doing something sweet will always get Ты off the hook.
7. If Ты talk about having a big dick; we know Ты don’t.
8. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that
want relationships.
9. We don’t like it when Ты act like Mr....
continue reading...
posted by jessicamc26
The Engineer

An engineer dies and reports to hell.

Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.

After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty Популярное guy.

One день God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake -- he should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here или I'll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are Ты going to get a lawyer?"
posted by Jeffersonian
A teacher forwarded this Список of Комментарии from test papers, essays, etc., Отправлено to science and health teachers by elementary, junior high, high school, and college students. As she noted, It is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars can create under the pressures of time and grades.

The body consists of three parts - the branium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the сердце and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u.
Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it...
continue reading...
1 when they ask u what your name is, make a name up (like hello kitty или santino marella. или even better, if youre a girl make up a guys vice versa for da guys)

2 when they ask u what insturment u play, make up a name for your insturment

3 when u have to introduce that person, mess up, like say a stupid name and a wierd insturment they play. then explain that's what Ты heard when they explained it 2 you

4 wear a рубашка over your uniform that makes the other teams band members offended.

5 hug them, and place a beetle INSIDE their uniform

6 bring along your little Brother/sister (if u dont hav one...
continue reading...
posted by cheeeese
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyy
added by Dreamtime
added by BlondLionEzel
Source: Google
added by flippy_fan210
video
Return the slab или suffer my curse
video
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